Sen's House of Memes

“Sure, I’d read anybody else’s journals if they kept any,” says Okita. “Even Kondou-san’s. Maybe especially Kondou-san’s. But I’d have to be more careful about keeping that one secret, since I don’t really wanna rock that boat.” He shrugs. “I like knowing things, that’s all, and people aren’t usually straight with me if I just ask. It’s easier, and more interesting, to snoop around instead.” Okita lets out a brief sigh. “Thing is, Hijikata-san’s the only one who actually keeps any kind of diary. That’s why I don’t have as much dirt on anybody else.”

“Hell if I know,” says Nagakura, scowling, and crosses his arms. “My old man didn’t teach me shit, except to shut up and do what I was told.” He snorts. “You can see how well that turned out. Pretty sure the best thing a father can do for his son is to stand aside and let him figure himself out.”

“And as far as I’m concerned, I don’t have a father,” says Okita. “He didn’t have time to teach me anything before he died. I don’t even remember his face.” He pops a couple knuckles nonchalantly. “Why ask me?”

Amagiri lets out a light sigh. “Respect,” he says, turning his head away from Nagakura and Okita’s predictably scornful expressions. “Adherence to a code of honor, according to tradition. The best a parent can do for his or her children is to instill in them good sense and good manners.”

“Yes,” responds Okita, but it is written plain across his face—eyes sharp in warning, brow twitching in the beginnings of a scowl, lips pressed together—that he has no intention of explaining himself.

Hijikata shakes his head. “There’s no way he’d turn his back on the shogunate that gave him his position,” he says. “They handed him his power even though he was just a farmer, so he’d never use it against them—especially since he’s always valued loyalty and tradition so highly.” He lets out a short breath, half a laugh. “He’d have to be a different person, born and raised in another class and family, to fight on the other side. Hard to say whether I’d follow a man like that.”

Okita lets out a long breath. “Yeah, I know, but… I’d still join him,” he says, truthfully, and stares fixedly at the ground. (Hijikata’s expression is grim, but not surprised.) “No matter who he supports, if he showed me kindness when I needed it, then… I’d still have a debt to pay. The bigger picture’s always been kinda blurry for me compared to what I’ve lived.”

“What do you mean, what would I think?” returns Nagakura, raising his eyebrows. “I’d be impressed no matter what, since not too many folks bother keeping up with all the little details once their minds are made up who they’re supporting, but… everything else depends. Mostly on what she looks like.”

Harada laughs. “Not as much as I should, if you listen to Souji,” he says. “But I do put in my time, like everyone else. The spear is my dominant weapon, but obviously, I have to be good with a sword too, in case there isn’t room for it wherever I’m fighting. So I do make sure to practice at least a little bit every day, just in case—if only so everyone has sparring partners.”

“I hope we will all live to see it,” says Sanan simply, but the sadness in his smile says that he does not believe it likely.

“The night we first met Yukimura-kun, she was out cold,” says Kondou, frowning. “The only choice I had besides giving her a room until the morning was putting her to death before she woke up, and I certainly couldn’t have done that. I think we did our best.”

“Knowing what I know now, I might not have let Souji-kun tie her so tightly, or even at all,” says Inoue thoughtfully. “But at the time, it was a reasonable measure to protect the Shinsengumi’s interests. I’m not sure whether it would have been wise…”

Nagakura ruffles his hair awkwardly. “Yeah,” he mumbles, his eyes faraway; his mind is plainly elsewhere. “I don’t know.”

“Well, I could’ve just killed her while Hajime-kun was busy cutting up those furies, but that’d make things a little less interesting around here,” remarks Okita. “So really, I don’t think I’d change anything. All for the best.”

Saito and Hijikata both glance disapprovingly at Okita out the corners of their eyes, but do not address his less-than-subtle threat. “I think we all handled that about as well as we could have, under the circumstances,” says Hijikata, and Saito nods. “Can’t think of anything I’d do differently.”

“I agree,” says Saito quietly, closing his eyes.

“Can’t remember,” says Nagakura. “I know I’ve had a lot, but I’m not really the best person to ask. But if passing out counts, that’s probably my biggest problem.”

“Not to be boring, but I don’t know that I’ve had any moments I’d take back,” says Harada thoughtfully. “All of us need to unwind now and again, and sake brings out the kid in all of us. Or maybe the teenager,” he adds, glancing sideways at Nagakura.

Heisuke nods, looking faintly envious of Harada’s easy self-acceptance. “Well, one time I walked into three doors in the same night in front of geisha because I kept getting distracted,” he mumbles. “I couldn’t show my face there for the rest of the week.”

Shiranui shrugs. “Eh, why not,” he says, glancing sideways at Harada. “If he’ll have me, anyway. I’ve drunk with plenty more obnoxious guys, even on my side, so it might be a nice change of pace.”

“I don’t know yet,” says Harada gruffly, crossing his arms and staunchly ignoring Shiranui. “Depends on whether the bastard kills any more of my friends before all’s said and done.”

“So that’s the way it’s gonna be, huh,” chuckles Shiranui, looking not the least bit concerned, and rests his hand on his holster.

“I believe I drink less often,” says Sanan. “Not that I drank particularly often before I became a fury, either, but… now, there is even less time for it amid all my research. But then, I don’t think I miss it all that much.”

Note: Aw, thanks for the compliment!! ^w^

Yamazaki and Shimada exchange a glance. “We don’t mind in the slightest,” says Yamazaki, and Shimada nods in agreement. “It’s our duty, after all, and it doesn’t happen very often to begin wtih. We’ve been able to work out a satisfactory routine with Yukimura-kun, since the only time we get called in as her guards are when she must bathe unexpectedly for some reason.”

“If someone approaches, we just tell them that the area is off-limits for maintenance,” adds Shimada. “Like Yamazaki said, we have to guard Yukimura-kun so seldom that it’s a believable excuse. Almost nobody needs to bathe at that time, anyway.”

“As for what we do in the meantime, we simply enjoy the downtime,” says Yamazaki, sharing a small smile with Shimada. “The two of us rarely have the chance to catch up amid all the work we have to do, and even standing in silence gives us the opportunity to reflect and meditate.”

“I’ve never had a girlfriend,” says Nagakura, “so… I don’t really know. I’d want to spend as much time with her as possible, whatever that means, but work comes first. She’d have to know that.” He sighs. “An exclusive relationship would be a new thing for me, too. We’d have to play it by ear.”

Heisuke nods. “I haven’t ever had a real girlfriend, either, so we’d just… do whatever feels right, I guess,” he says. “But I know I liked the feeling of holding hands when I was a kid. Other than that, it’d just be the obvious—hugs and kisses and little surprises now and then.”

“I’d take her out shopping, or out to meals,” says Harada. “I’d make sure to go out in public with her, to show the world how much I love her—and to show her that I love her enough to let the world see.”

Kazama narrows his eyes. “If she is drunk, spiriting her away would be too easy,” he says, crossing his arms. “Of course I’d permit her to kiss me, but no more than that. I must marry her first, and she must be sober and in the presence of the Shinsengumi before I take her away. So you see, there are a number of hidden prerequisites; I cannot subvert them for the sake of indulging shallower desires, whether hers or mine.” He sighs. “No matter how sorely I am tempted…”

“What life?” returns Kazama sardonically. “I’d have nothing left to live for—no legacy to protect, no reason to fight this war, no capability of finishing what I have started. Why keep on living at all?” He sighs, glancing aside. “I am fully aware that the only reason I outmatch the Shinsengumi is because of my natural superiority. I have never had to work for my strength, and the fact that even the humans among them can put up a decent fight speaks volumes as to theirs. Without my demon powers, any one of them could defeat me with ease; unlike them, I have never received any official training with a sword.” He bows his head. “I could not allow them the satisfaction of killing me so easily, and there is no joy to be had living as an insect, so… the only solution is to take my own life. I may despise the humans who throw their lives away rather than face the consequences of their actions, but I would never have asked for this. Death is preferable to such a fate.”