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#john – @sgt-revolver on Tumblr
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Nothing Is Real

@sgt-revolver / sgt-revolver.tumblr.com

Anna | late 20s | they/them | queer | aquarius
Just ever so slightly obsessed with the Beatles
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"I think I was suicidal on some kind of subconscious level.… Night and day drinking or taking Librium or whatever," he said recently, sitting in one of his luxury apartments at the Dakota building. "The goal was to obliterate the mind so that I wouldn't be conscious. I didn't want to see or feel anything. Part of me can't believe I would self-destruct — the youthful part that feels invincible. Yet another part realizes that I could have died. I was consuming at least a bottle of vodka a day, and a half bottle or more of brandy. Also, I did things like jumping out of cars. It was a crazy kind of teen-age game I had: telling myself, 'I wasn't meant to die at this moment so I can jump out of the car.' What I was ignoring, of course, was that the next car after us could have run over me. Making music was no longer a joy. For twenty years, I had been under this pressure to produce, produce, produce. My head was cluttered. Every time I’d sit down to write, there would be a cloud between me and the source, a cloud that hadn’t been there before. I was trapped and saw no way out."

John Lennon for Robert Hilburn, L.A. Times, November 16, 1980

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Cher: The night I took a drunken John Lennon to the Playboy mansion - and he stripped stark naked in front of me in the infamous secret Grotto

Walking into an Italian restaurant in Los Angeles one Sunday evening I bumped into John Lennon and his friend Harry Nilsson and they asked if I could take them to Hugh Hefner's house for movie night.

'John's dying to see the Playboy Mansion,' Harry pleaded.

Hef held parties all the time, many of which became notorious as drunken orgies with some of the Playmates, but his Sunday movie nights were calm and casual affairs for friends to enjoy cocktails and dinner before watching a new release.

I didn't have anything else going on that night in 1974 so I agreed to drive them to Hef's and realised too late that they were drunker than I'd thought. There were about 50 people there and just as the movie was about to start, the two of them put on aristocratic English accents and started chanting, 'Hef! Hef! Hef!' except with the accents it sounded like 'Huff! Huff! Huff!'.

Mortified, I could tell Hef was starting to get annoyed.

'Stop that!' I told them. 'Come with me.' It was like I became the mother and they were two 14-year-old boys.

Giggling and falling over each other, John and Harry followed me out into the grounds. Sitting them down inside the infamous Grotto – it was like a huge cave that one end of the swimming pool went into – I went to find a drink and when I came back they were standing in the middle of the Grotto naked but still in the water, thank God.

'This is not pretty what I'm seeing,' I said when they started to emerge from the pool. 'Guys, please do not come out.'

I was trying not to laugh, but it was impossible not to as they threatened to wander around the mansion naked. It took me ages to get them back in their clothes. It was like herding drunks.

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John Lennon and Yoko Ono at Tittenhurst Park posing with figurines of themselves from the album cover "Two Virgins", November 5, 1969.
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