The Serpent of the Moon

RULE NO. 1 OF WOUND CARE: ignore itttt :33

DO NOT

The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.

how dare you say we piss on the poor

all hail the 1 million note Piss Post

Would being called big dog fix me? Who knows?

Mixed reviews

"What's up, big dog; I'm ratsmacker" is going to live rent free in my head for a little while

Boys who up smacking they rat?

the lovely woman who owned kabosu, the shiba known as doge, should get to take a point blank shot at elon musk with the doohickey that killed shinzo abe

Every day is a reason to celebrate 🥂🥳

I hope you don’t mind, but I slowed the gif down because that is a FANTASTIC move.

this is the kind of shit that gets described as “quickly disarmed him” in writing and truly doesn’t do it justice

songs used to have a bridge and a third chorus

let’s get you to bed grandma

used to have sick 3 minute guitar solos also

"omg stop saying fat lesbians you can just say butch. You can literally just say butch." Hey guys? Butch isn't a body type? It's like, a complex set of identity factors? You guys know other people, yes even other lesbians, can be fat, right? You know femmes can be fat and hairy, right? You know lesbians who don't/don't want to fall under either label can be fat right???? You guys know people can be fat, right???????????????

Ok this is the best one i've seen.

saw a grown woman on tiktok snidely calling gen z the christopher columbus generation bc someone’s fifteen year old son ‘thought he’d discovered weezer’. newsflash every generation finds out about the music of the previous generation at some point it comes free with being fifteen. being annoying about music also comes free with being fifteen. a kid saying yeah i’ve just found this band nirvana have you ever heard of them should be a thing of joy

encouraging young people to seek out older art is how we prevent everything we love from being forgotten to time--or worse, rebooted and replaced like a reanimated corpse

the bartender asks if i want the usual and i make a joke and say i want the unusual if they have it in the back and he giggles and walks through the door i havent seen until that point and comes back carrying a handful of wet colorful river shallow rocks and puts them on the bartop and we both look at them for hours until they dry and go dull and then we pour a little water over them again and look on

Yesterday my little brother told me something very sweet and touching, that when he was a kid and had nightmares about monsters chasing him or whatever he would be able to end the nightmare by finding me in the dream and I would protect him by fighting off the zombies, or carrying him away. This is adorable, and makes me feel like the greatest older sibling in the world, but the hilarious thing is that when I was a kid I had nightmares of needing to save him from zombies and such. so many dreams where he was in trouble and I needed to save him. Like my nightmares began where his ended. Low key I think he mastered the ability to psychically transfer his nightmare to me as a child and I'm kind of annoyed with him.

me n the girls walkin into target headed straight to the clearance bread rack

jerrod how long did it take you to photoshop all that bread

Did it the lazy easy way: 

It may be less than stellar, but I have a strict personal rule: “don’t put longer than 30 minutes’ effort into a fetish joke”. The second you hit 30:01, the exposure becomes lethal and the fetish becomes unironic.

FETISH?????????

god i wish i were you

Whitch part is the fetish? Bread or Pokémon?

I’m so sorry to have to be the one to tell you this but it’s the bread

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS THE BREAD

I told my students they're allowed to be creative and don't have to be factual when writing about themselves in German because I keep getting questions like "what if I don't have roommates or what if I don't have hobbies" and I'm like guys just make something up! Have fun! I won't fact check you!

So now I am grading homework where a student is claiming to be from North Korea and his hobby is tax fraud

I fully believe that as long as it's grammatically correct, coherent and answering the question students should be able to write whatever the hell they want. I don't care about their actual hobbies and the names of their siblings.

One of my students is writing about a ghost he "interviewed". The ghost is called Walter and died in 1865 . The ghost has ghost friends.

This is making grading homework significantly more fun.

juice disappears faster than any other liquid it is a frightening world we live in