The Star Patient

It's three in the morning and I'm bored so have this

Random out of the blue headcanon that Captain Magnum is afraid of heights. I don’t know why, it’s just a gut feeling :/c

Ever since he’d learned that Mark took inspiration from Indiana Jones for his birth, Illinois had felt an admiring kinship for the character. He had binged every movie, read every novelization.

Now, however, he loathed the man more than anything—him and his weapon of choice. Illinois only carried the whip in honor of him. As the leader of the bandits cracked it yet again, a scream tore from his throat, almost as painful as the flesh ripping away from his shoulders.

Blood wept in burning trails down his heaving back. His companion, bound and gagged nearby, wept even harder.

I can’t help but notice that Dark is wearing his AHWM dress shoes, dress pants, and yet when he reaches down he has no sleeves.

Where is his suit jacket? Did my guy just casually stroll out to pick up this highly coveted universe-breaking crystal while still wearing that t-shirt from the AHWM blooper reel? He did, didn’t he?

Nope, I don't think so. Different outfits and aesthetics, see? Illinois is the rugged adventurer on the road, Noir Mark's the investigative engineer. Although if they were the same person or twins or whatnot, it would make for a cool theory XD

“But if you deviate from it for even a single moment...I won’t come back for you.”

This part of today’s video is giving me suspiciously familiar vibes e_e

So Mark has promised that ISWM will be much bigger and better than Heist was, right? That probably means a grander scale, more intricate plots, the whole shebang. Great!

But will it get one of Youtube’s promotional billboards, where Heist apparently fell short? That’s what I’m really waiting to see

Whumptober #20: Trapped Underwater

As Illinois plunged through the surface of the lake, oxygen abandoned his burning lungs in a rush. For a terrifying time he was paralyzed, head hammering in dazed agony from the impact, before the sheer frigidity registered. Water slammed to the back of his throat as he thrashed for some kind of purchase.

He should have been able to reorient himself but his flashlight had spiraled wildly away, quickly vanishing in the storm of bubbles and silt. Which way was up? His fingertips were already buzzing in the blackness; the cold could easily claim him before he drowned.

A half-numbed jolt of pain wrenched one foot sideways. He twisted, trying to kick, and sputtered in blind panic when he found it wouldn’t follow. Something had wedged his leg and held fast. Underwater stalagmites?

No—Please—!

An even deeper darkness heard his silent cries and closed in to embrace him.

Whumptober #19: Stabbing

This was what came of trying to assert dominance in Yancy’s prison. Rival gangs didn’t hold a candle to him and his own. Try to dance with Yanc’, you don’t get a second chance.

Now if only he had a second chance to see that shiv coming. Sloppy mistake.

Though sore with ebbing adrenaline, he held firm, subtly bunching the fabric of his uniform against his side. Blinking hard to clear his vision, he breathed as evenly as he could, smiled and commended each of the others in turn. No weakness in front of the boys. No need to let on. In their eyes he was untouchable.

It was only after they were escorted safely away that he wavered. Slumping against the bars for support, he shot a watery grin at the nearest guard. “H-Hey, uh, pal…Don’t suppose you’se got some kind of permission slip for me t’see the nurse…?”

Pleaaaaase, let Amy play an alien in the space sequel, please, please, please?

When Heist 2 comes out, Mark's channel banner is probably going to change and that's going to be kinda surreal

With knowledge of Heist 2 approaching, I appreciate how the glitches highlight Mark's use of the words "decisions" and "random". I see what you're doing there >_>

It’s slowly sinking in that every day brings Heist 2 a little bit closer. Every day, we’re all a few steps closer toward being sucked back into the black hole that is the Heist With Markiplier franchise

An exclusive picture of Tumblr executives explaining their reasoning behind the Post+ debacle