sometimes I think about dean’s childhood and want to cry
#winchester problems#that scene is still and will probably always be my favourite in the series#i stopped breathing the first time i saw it#i damn near break down every time after that#because this is in many ways the purest essence of#Dean Winchester#Daddy's blunt little instrument#deep down inside he KNOWS he deserves better#but john would never let him actualise it#never let him love the way he needs to#never let him be the person he wants to#he's so afraid every minute of every day#so afraid he can only say this to himself alone in the dark in a dream#never out loud#daylight confessions and self-worth are things for men that#dean was painstakingly taught he could never be#fucking try to tell me john wasn't abusive fucking try me#not a john winchester appreciation blog (via)