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#otp: much of the time i'd rather be here – @selfihateyouithink on Tumblr
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round and round the winchesters go

@selfihateyouithink / selfihateyouithink.tumblr.com

I am an Angel of the Lord who probably would do well in finance, and I don't like to do what people expect. Thirty-four. White USian. Autistic, anxious depressive (with PTSD). Nonbinary/genderqueer (demigirl). She/they pronouns. Sex-indifferent pan gay greyromantic demisexual. INFP/ISFP. Survivor. Socialist. Feminist. Relativist. Agnostic atheist. Struggling college student (yes, still). Honest misanthrope (because humans are works of art but humanity is tainted by its hatreds, conceits, and deceits), almost never neutral (because the status quo isn't), and unapologetic slasher 'til death do I stop. I am things, I question things, I like things, I hate things, I watch things, I read things, I write things, I say things, I do things. Things happen on this blog.
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Anonymous asked:

maybe i have internalized heterosexism or maybe its my fear that spn will be heterosexist but i still think casxhannah could be a thing. like there hasnt been any build up from cas yet but why not let cas say that clearly instead of the thing about feelings getting in the way of the mission, in the end they can go oh yes cas tots wants hannah but he thinks they dont have time for it.ifeel like they left a loophole i need my mom i dont want this *baby crying noises*

I understand your concerns, and Supernatural has justified this particular worry many times in the past, but I don’t think it’s a possibility at all?

The reason for the specific wording, in my opinion, was—as I said in my tags—metatextually sending out a pretty clear beacon of “no more distractions, no detours, we’re all in on this arc”: that Hannah is our last False Romantic Lead before we get to our destination (and I will, if I’m wrong about that, admit it as I did that I was wrong about sibs > romance).

Honestly, have you ever called someone you genuinely want to be with “a distraction” when you realize they like you, telling them “none of this, focus on other important stuff” because they pale in comparison to your self-professed real “priorities”? Imo, the same as the “a dramatic narrative creates conflict and we fuck each other over cos we live in that universe” metatextual leanings Edlund (who made little secret of his issue with the S6-S7 Cas arc) made in 7x21 with his “Sorry universe” conversation with Dean, with this conversation shooting Hannah down, Carver and Cas are both asserting their priorities.

I don’t really see it as a loophole whatsoever, honestly, but then, I actively fight against heterosexist thinking (and no, there’s no maybe, babe, you and I, and probably everybody else I have ever met and plan to ever meet has some internalized heterosexism; it’s a thing whether you know it or not) at all times, and tbh, sometimes naively because I sometimes see the world as it should be over how it is. I guess time will tell which one of us is right.

yeah i definitely see the world from a “everything i hate/fear will happen no matter how much speaks against it” pov.

I can understand that. I mean, I have #anxiety and #depression so I totally have those thoughts a lot. But that’s part of why I’m so deeply invested in something going right, as well. Contradict my thoughts, world, do it.

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