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Just watched the Barbarian trailer and oh myyyyy I forgot how sexy Bill’s voice is🫠

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Anonymous asked:

Hi lovely!! What are each of the Bill’s headcannons for their pussy eating skills 😏😏

Please excuse my character biases, but if you think me wrong, let us debate! Here are my takes... +

Axel -

Adjective: Masterful

Axel prides himself on his oral skills. Not only is he highly intuitive to his partner's needs, but he also takes enormous pleasure in making them come with his mouth alone. It's not all tongue tricks either - he knows the power of a well-placed moan, a kiss, the exact amount of suction and when to initiate it, and when to withhold. He's vocal during the experience and loves to make you answer questions to earn more attention. At first, it may seem daunting, but if you play along, he'll reward you with the most thigh-shaking experience one could ever expect from a man of his reputation. Axel keeps 'em coming back for more because nobody does it quite like Mr. Cluney.

Clark -

Adjective: Disappointing

Clark's oral aptitudes apply only to his incapability of shutting up, boasting of his (apparently non-existent) talents and fabricating promises on which he does not deliver. Clark, although handsome and charming, falls short on the cunnilingus aspect of sex. He talks a big game and gets you excited for what is to (never) cum. His pussy-eating game is amateur at most, or perhaps downright lazy. If he's not getting his, then he has no reason to care about anything else. Though he's a worldly man of many stories, that's about all he's good for - a good laugh and 4

Dane -

Adjective: Sloppy

This handsome substance abuser isn't renowned for his pussy-eating talents, but he makes an effort. Albeit, a rushed one. Dane is all tongue, enthusiastic to a fault and unaware of the sheer length of his fingers when he introduces them to the mix. Dane's motto is live fast, die a legend, but his accolades will not include world champion pussy-eater. If you like it rough and rushed, Dane's your man. He has no concept of "slow and steady wins the race." But he'll lavish your clit with his tongue until there's a puddle of drool beneath you...so there's that.

Henry Deaver -

Adjective: Methodical

Henry likes to do things by the book... No, really. He literally bought a book on how to perform cunnilingus and has several bookmarked tabs on the subject. He's sweet, steady and likes to really set the mood. We're talking scented candles, fresh sheets spritzed with rose water, dimmed lights and maybe even some romantic music playing low in the background. Mr. Deaver doesn't quite understand that it's not a one size fits all type scenario, but he's willing to accept feedback. Although, not without a furious blushing episode and a solemn promise to never do the thing you don't like ever again. He takes his time with you - slow kisses around your clit for what seems like an hour before he makes contact. This is a balancing act for him, as he has to mentally keep himself in check to not blow a load just from the sound of you telling him he's doing a good job. Henry Deaver will eventually get the job done and take notes afterward to make sure the next time is even better.

Henry Pearl -

Adjective: Timid

Without much experience, Henry Pearl does not put himself out there as a lothario by any means. He'll be the first to admit he has no idea what he's doing and relies heavily on his partner to guide him. But when he gets the hang of it, Henry does well. He's the type to flourish with lots of encouragement, so the more help he receives, the better the end product. He's smart and retains knowledge, so he doesn't need to be told time and again. Once he's got it, it's iron-clad in his mind, but that doesn't mean he won't blush when you ask him to go down on you. He's another slow-burn type of guy, preferring to take his time and really make a meal out of it when it comes time to please his partner. He likes to use his hands, and figures out that incorporating a finger at the right time is grounds for instant orgasm, but he only busts that move out when his jaw gets tired - and boy, this dude never sleeps.

Mark -

Adjective: Amateur

Mark's only knowledge of pussy-eating is what he sees in lesbian porn. Oral sex is an afterthought on the best of days. While this can be attributed to his lack of experience, he doesn't really demonstrate a want or need to improve and will only give when he's asked. The results are exactly what you might expect from a guy who only hears stories in the locker room and thinks sex is all about how many acrobatic positions you can perform in a whole twelve minutes. We do not have high hopes for Mark.

Merkel -

Adjective: Exotic

Merkel knows the body well. His prolific sexual encounters span countries, the entire gender spectrum, age ranges and have deep roots in kink and fetish exploration. Merkel is experimental and is always looking for new ways to make oral sex something his partner will never forget. Whether it's using vibrators to assist in his performance, locking your wrists to your thighs so you have no place to hide, taking you forcefully in a back alley or teasing you for so long you're begging for his tongue, Merkel has it down. He was making pussies squirt before he could legally purchase alcohol. And he's humble. Merkel isn't the type to brag or even give you an inkling of what to expect. He'll simply blindfold you and introduce you to sensations you never knew existed.

Mickey -

Adjective: Romantic

Mickey is a simple guy who loves to love. Valentine's Day is sacred, and he'll go all out with rose petals and champagne (cheap stuff, but it's the thought that counts!) He's better than the average lover but is a bit clumsy. What he lacks in finesse he makes up for with a perfect puppy dog stare and compliments. He enjoys a good pussy-licking and often daydreams of the moment he gets to come home to his love so he can show them the move he swears he invented all by himself. Sometimes, his cravings get so intense that's all he can think about. Mickey doesn't always need sex or reciprocation. He simply wants to make his baby orgasm hard all over his face and he'll do so by any means necessary. Bashfulness is not something Mickey suffers from, so he'll always ask if he's doing well with his face between your legs. If you're happy, he's happy.

Roman -

Adjective: Adventurous

Roman doesn't take no for an answer. On your period? Pffft. Busy at work? Demand an extra-long break or he'll have your manager removed from their position. In a crowd? Better get to a stall fast. Roman wants what he wants when he wants it and you have to adapt quickly to keep his roaring appetite at bay. Roman will fuck you first, and suck the cum out of you after. He's pretty fucking nasty, which comes as a surprise for most who encounter the wealthy and well-dressed heir. But if you say no, he'll find someone else faster than you can say "what the fuck, Roman?" It's not about romance, power or even eroticism. It's all about satisfying the craving before it has a chance to take over his brain. Everything in Roman's life revolves around instant gratification which can result in his impatience if you take too long to orgasm. Though he's skilled with his tongue, his spoiled convictions can get in the way. Give Roman what he wants, and he'll reward you. However, if you hesitate, it's on to the next.

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2k follower celebration

i can’t believe i’m making this post.

2k followers? that’s just bonkers to me. and it’s all thanks to each and every one of you. thank you so much for following me and reading my writing on this silly little corner of the internet. it means more than you’ll ever know.

as a token of my gratitude, i thought it would be fun to do a little challenge. i’m extending this to content creators of all kinds. that means writers, gif makers, photo and video editors, artists, so on and so forth. if you can create something, join in!

guidelines/info:

below are a list of song lyric prompts. choose whichever one that inspires you, and create something based around it

you can choose from the following to base your creation on: bill himself or any of his characters, or any of the skarsgard brothers and their respective characters

once you’ve picked a character, create a story, art piece, gifset, edit, or whatever else you’d like, centered around them

alternatively, i’ve also created a moodboard of different pictures that you may choose from if you’d prefer that over the song lyrics. or, you can use both the lyrics and a picture if you want

there is no deadline for you to post your creation. so no pressure! take your time

prompts:

  1. sometimes i look at the stars, and think about how small we are (pressure machine - the killers)
  2. when i’m with you, it’s just like it’s the first time. never thought that you would turn into my best life (april 7th - the maine)
  3. when we’re dancing this way, the walls around us seems to tumble away (do it with the lights on - islands)
  4. if we fall in love, i will lose you (fall in love - moaning)
  5. your love is scaring me, no one has ever cared for me as much as you do (scary love - the neighbourhood)
  6. everyone who sees you falls in love (your love (deja vu) - glass animals)
  7. if you were church, i’d get on my knees (church - fall out boy)
  8. in the spoils of your mercy, in the reverence of your bed, in the cradle of the morning, what was it that you said? (can’t deny my love - brandon flowers)
  9. the hardest part of making love is breaking up, so if you don’t mind, i think we should stay in love (i think we should stay in love - jesse rutherford)
  10. i know that girls like you don’t come with guarantees, so if you’ve got to spend your time, won’t you spend it with me? (kiss goodnight - idkhbtfm)
  11. all those marbles in the sky, now i see the marble in your eyes (marble - islands)
  12. maybe you’ve become the monster you’ve been running from (gospel - the tragic thrills)
  13. love isn’t what i thought it was, ‘cause i’ve never known love like this before (this life - vampire weekend)
  14. i want to hold you like you’re mine (agnes - glass animals)
  15. i can’t ever be your everything, but i wanna be your loverboy (loverboy - sir sly)
  16. when you’re in love, you can be blinded by your own heart (desperate things - the killers)
  17. these four words don’t come easy…i don’t love you (these four words - the maine)
  18. i went through hell to get to high water, and now i’m trying not to drown (hell or high water - the neighbourhood)
  19. love. love is the warmest color (nara - alt-j)
  20. everything you say, it sounds like sweet talk to my ears (sweet talk - saint motel)

here’s a moodboard for extra inspiration:

you have total creative control here, so go crazy with it. i can’t wait to see all your creations. much love!

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scxrsgxrd

Congratulations🥳it’s been so great to be able to read all of your amazing works and it wouldn’t be the same here without you. This celebration sounds like a fun one!

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if there’s one thing i think we’ve collectively learned from watching clark, it’s that bill brings out the slut in all of us, and i think that’s beautiful

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Watching Bill have so much screen time in a role he’s clearly very passionate about has been one of the best parts of watching Clark😌

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