You and the Doctor are a well-matched pair of pests.

this is a typo in a textbook written by the professor of this class, it cost me $105, i will be sharing with the world

The Pillows - Brand-New Lovesong

I don’t need to go out and get “turned up” to have a fun time!

My cat Tesla

2010. A Japanese woman sits down to take photos of her shiba inu dog for her blog. Suddenly, a man leaps out of a time portal. "Sorry, I can't let you do this. I cannot tell you why." She asks: "Is it forbidden knowledge from the future?" He sighs: "No, it's just too fucking stupid to explain."

Item: Tear Gun that collects your tears and freezes them into bullets to shoot the people that made you cry with

this is absolutely sending me

What a way to find out that you’re a vampire

Reminds me of this story:

I just love her stomping on the notebook at the end, comedy gold

You think THATS a denim jacket?

Surely you

That punchline hit me like a sack of wet mice

Like a sack of what

IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST

my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old

Op this is the funniest thing I’ve ever read

op how could you just hide this from me in the tag this makes this objectively 10000000% funnier

50 First Doses

You trick Louis? You trick Louis like a common fool? Oh jail, jail for owners ONE MILLION YE-oh what’s this? A treat?

my mom got me this little thing and im obsessed with him.... little creature..

I have been thinking. about the creature

I think it's cute how so many art movements are simply called "new art" to differentiate "not like the old stuff". Contemporary dance. New wave fashion. Pop (literally popular) music. Art Nouveau. Modernism. Postmodernism. Even terms starting with neo- (neo-classicism, neo-expressionism) all are just saying NEW ART. And yet all of these things are now distinctive styles of the past. It's kind of beautiful how humanity never stops outgrowing itself. Art is a state of matter that refuses to sit still, old as soon as it is new, original upon its thousandth performance, new forever so long as there is someone who has not yet seen it, and old the second the artist picks up their instrument again.

New new NEW art (14)(THIS ONE!).docx

Shipping a man in a canon het relationship with another man but I'm shaking my head the whole time so you know it's not out of misogynistic disregard for the woman character

i have a suggestion

lets hear out tumblr user isuggestpolyamory