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#problamatic ship – @schwifty-rick on Tumblr
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squanch and chill

@schwifty-rick / schwifty-rick.tumblr.com

+18 only please | occasional #nsfw commissions: open!
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Potentially Unpopular Opinion: I’m honestly getting pretty tired of people pretending that our ship isn’t problamatic.

News flash: it is.

It’s problamatic as all hell. It’s downright disgusting. We know this. We need to own this shit. I want to read more fics that explore the problamatic aspects of the ship. I want to feel Rick’s utter self loathing as he jerks off at night, tipping back bottle after bottle hoping he can forget his fucked up desires. 

I want Morty worrying why the hell he can’t be a normal teenager and just get off to regular porn like any other fourteen year old with free reign of the internet. I want Morty hating himself for imagining Rick’s voice as he sneakily looks up guy on guy on YouPorn. 

I want Rick unable to look Beth in the eye after him and Morty fuck, and him pulling away as Beth leans in to give him a hug because, “Dad I’m just so glad you’re home.”

Please, I’m putting out an official request. Can we stop pretending that when they fuck it’ll be sunshine and roses? It’s not. It’ll be hands clamped over mouths to keep quiet, sneaking downstairs into Rick’s room at night and doing laundry while Beth and Jerry aren’t home so they don’t have to explain the stains on Rick’s bedsheets. 

We need to explore what makes this ship so complex. The dynamic has so many possibilities that can be touched upon, it’s really a shame to abandon it in favor of a good romp fic (even though I do understand why people write them). 

Sincerely,

Schwifty.

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