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pray you catch me - p.l. dubois

A/N: This blurb is based off of pray you catch me by beyonce! I would like to extend a big, big thank you to @moritzseider and @jamiedrysdales for reading and editing.

word count: 811

warnings: very angsty, mentions of cheating

You were trailing back to the master bedroom with a glass of water when you realized your husband was on the phone. Your curiosity and suspicion getting the best of you, you decided to lean against the door and hear what was being said on the other side. Little did you know how much you would eventually come to regret that decision.

“I know, babe, I know…” his whispering voice trailed off. It was that snippet of a phone conversation you weren’t initially meant to hear that told you everything you needed to know.

You had caught Pierre-Luc calling someone, who wasn’t you, babe over the phone, in your own house. It all made sense; Why he seemed so distant as of late, why it felt like the last time you saw a genuine smile from him was one that belonged in a distant memory.

You sighed as the weight of your body retreated against the doorframe. You were conflicted with emotions. Obviously, it left you shattered now that you knew where his loyalties stood. However, you felt a great deal of confusion at the strange fact that you held a sense of relief, too. In an odd and almost cynical sense, you prayed that he would catch you eavesdropping and see how destroyed you were. Pierre-Luc should be the one to realize he was the one who caused your marriage to fail.

You were brought out of your thoughts by Pierre-Luc’s voice once again, this time meant for you to hear. “Babe? Are you ready for bed?”

You struggled to keep your composure at him calling you babe this time, but decided against confrontation at this hour. Understandably, you had to take a moment to collect yourself, but apparently, Pierre-Luc considered the moment to be a bit too long. “Babe?” He had the audacity to repeat that word. That nickname of affection haunted and mocked you as you came to terms with no longer being the only one who held that title.

“Yeah…” mumbling but finding the strength to continue, “just give me a second!” You called out, taking the time to rid yourself of the lingering tears and evidence of heartbreak. Heading towards the master bedroom, you took a deep breath and faked a perfect smile when your eyes met his.

His smile mirrored yours, even the fakest parts. However, that didn’t stop him from approaching you for a goodnight kiss. As your lips connected with his, they acted as a test to confirm what you already knew. You had no idea how he could pass it off so cavalier, it almost made you angry.

Selfishly, you chased his lips with yours once more, hoping to find more passion behind them. And then you stopped. You remembered, you were kissing the lips of someone who was capable of loving you so deeply, so ardently— and yet he chose to lie to you. He chose to give up on you.

A look of concern quickly flashed across Pierre-Luc’s face, “Are you okay, babe?”

You quickly shook yourself out of your sorrowful trance, “Hmm… what?” As his words sunk in, you made sure not to laugh at the ironic usage of that word again. “Yeah, I’m just exhausted,” you feigned with a yawn.

Looking back, there was some truth in that statement, which was more than what Pierre-Luc could say for himself. You were exhausted. Emotionally exhausted, that is.

Apparently satisfied with your answer, he shrugged, taking your hand and leading you to your shared bed. He quickly shuffled into the sheets with you. While these sheets never bothered you before, they managed to make you itch and crawled over your entire body at his next words.

“Good night, I love you.” At their utterance, you couldn’t help but wonder when those words had transitioned from being an unquestionable truth to a bold-faced lie.

Previously, you would have never considered leaving those three simple words unanswered. It would simply be out of character. But as you lay there, next to the person who you considered to be the love of your life, you settled for playing pretend for one more night. You would stay in character and break your own heart as you went along with the next lines in the script, “I love you, too.” Despite it being an act for him, you knew every syllable that moved past your lips was the truth.

As his breath evened out and he trailed off to sleep, you prepared yourself for what was to come tomorrow. You twisted your wedding band around your finger as a way to exert your nerves. For now, however, you would put your nerves aside as you went to bed with him by your side one last time. You carded your hand through his hair and softly whispered into his ear.

“What are you doing, my love?”

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