Thoughts on Beren, grief and depression
(This post includes a discussion of suicide/suicidal tendencies.)
One of the things that strikes me about Beren is that his early life was so full of suffering. Dorthonion was overrun by the forces of Morgoth when Beren was still very young, only in his early twenties. His mother left with the remnant of their people and it is implied that he never saw her again. After five years of defending Dorthonion with a small band of men, he lost his father under terrible circumstances, when Gorlim betrayed them, and Barahir and the other men were killed. Not only was Beren’s father killed by the treachery of one of his own men, his body was mutilated; Beren had to win back the ring of Barahir from the Orcs, who had taken his severed hand. Beren swore an oath of vengeance upon his father’s grave and defended Dorthonion alone as an outlaw until he was finally forced to escape to the south.
What it says in the Lays of Beleriand about Beren during this part of the story is really heartbreaking. When he buried his father, he ‘wept not, for his heart was ice,’ and because Barahir was dead, ‘sorrow now his soul had wrought to dark despair, and robbed his life of sweetness, that he longed for knife, or shaft, or sword, to end his pain.’ And afterwards, ‘danger he sought and death pursued.’ This is painful to read, but it also makes sense to me that Beren would feel this way: he has experienced so much trauma and loss. Even though it doesn’t say that he was planning to kill himself, pursuing death in battle seems to be so similar to suicidal ideation that it is almost indistinguishable from it, and that’s what these lines suggest to me.
I kept thinking about this part of the Lays of Beleriand, and why I found it so moving, and I think the reason is because in a lot of stories, heroic male characters like Beren aren’t usually shown to be depressed. If they’re portrayed feeling something after the death of a loved one, it’s usually anger, not deep sadness, grief and depression. And it’s comforting to see a heroic character like Beren portrayed as someone who went through all this—the grief, the depression, and wanting to die—and still had a happy ending. In many ways, it reminds me of Éowyn’s struggle with depression in LOTR.
I also think that Beren’s time in Dorthonion seems to reflect aspects of Tolkien’s own life. We all know that the tale of Beren and Lúthien was based on Tolkien’s relationship with Edith, but I think there are other aspects of his life reflected in Beren’s story: losing his parents at a young age, losing all of his closest friends, and the depression that would come with that. When I read about Beren living in Dorthonion, after his father and all his companions are dead, I think about how Tolkien lost all his friends in the war and was the only survivor. Along with characters like Frodo and Éowyn, Beren strikes me as another character where Tolkien’s own experiences of grief and loss really come through.