I talked about how world-altering Stede's reciprocation at the dock must have been for Ed, but equally, I need to scream about how world-altering Edward's affinity must have been for Stede.
Growing up with a distant family, so little in way of emotional openness, fondness, simple kindness; Stede's been shown, time and time again, that he's not worthy of something as natural and fulfilling as love. Not from family, not from peers, and not from his arranged marriage. Yet despite this incessant cold shoulder from the universe, he ends up giving in to this obscure flight of fancy of his: Stede chases his freedom. But of course, the novel world he enters is no kinder, this is pirating! His crew wants him dead, other pirates want him dead, he wanders his way into chaos at every turn and the whole thing is falling apart before it ever truly begins. As Badminton shoves in his face in episode one, no matter where he goes on this planet, Stede simply isn't wanted, isn't accepted. Forever a mockery.
But right as he enters the absolute culmination of the catastrophe that is his life- right as he fails his fatigued crew, bleeding and hanging by a rope- an ambush occurs, and not only is his life saved, but someone beams at a world-weary Stede Bonnet and sprinkles hope like fucking gold-dust. With a twinkle in his eyes, this stranger tells him with utter sincerity, "I've heard all about you." What that must have done for Stede at that moment?! Right as his life falls into the pieces that society forever told him it would, someone wants him. Someone would ambush a ship for him, someone would save his life for him, someone had heard about him and instead of wanting to ram a blade through his gut, they want to nurse him back to health. From the moment that Edward appears in Stede's life, he's offering a genuine sincerity that I can't imagine Stede's felt much of before.
From there it only spirals. Not only does Ed save him, but he also saves his crew. He takes control of the Revenge with skill, maintains order and personally sees over Stede as he recovers. Upon waking up, one of the very first conversations they have is Edward gushing at the eccentricity of Stede and his ship- there's no mockery, there's no disgust- just pure amazement at the world Stede's created. Then, as if any of this could be more shocking to Stede, it turns out the man that heard all about him, the guy that saved his life and lost his own men in the process, is none other than Blackbeard. Once again, can you imagine how that must've felt for Stede? Decades of being mocked and belittled and shunned for all that makes him ... him, and not only does someone enter his life who refutes those sentiments, but it turns out to be a person he admires? I have no idea how he was still standing after the closet scene!!
Before Stede realizes the extent of his affection, I think it's incredibly important that he discovers this genuine bond with Ed. When Izzy's giving his "we've been a fortnight aboard the Revenge" speech, we see these snapshots of Stede and Ed absolutely enjoying one another's company. They well and truly hit it off, and for the first time in likely both of their lives, they're building a relationship with someone who sees them for them- who indulges in the other's eccentricities, who negates their fears and validates their aspirations. Stede wants Edward to know how he sees him- the moonlight scene in episode five, "you wear fine things well," yes it's unintentional seduction but what's absolutely intentional is that Stede thinks so highly of Ed, not simply as a pirate, but as a human with struggles and desires and worries, and he wants Ed to know that- to understand that he is worthy of 'fine things'- he is worthy of love. He already cares so profoundly, even if he's yet to recognize the extent of that affection. It's terribly endearing.
There's an awful lot of push-and-pull that follows- Ed almost leaving multiple times, and Stede's desperate plea for him to stay in the form of an exciting scavenger hunt- but there's no denying that Stede knows he's found something utterly novel in his relationship with Edward. By episode eight, he doesn't deny Lucius' words when he regards the night's events as a break-up, he doesn't refute the fact that he cried at the prospect of Edward leaving his life so soon, so chaotically. I think once we get to episode nine, and Badminton #2 informs Stede that Blackbeard admitted to the murder, there's an undeniable reality hanging heavy in the air. Stede tries to deny Ed's confession and admits to it himself, but Badminton turns around and asks the crucial question:
"why would he [Blackbeard] lie?"
The answer to the audience is obvious, he would do so to protect Stede. I don't think it's a jump to assume that Stede came to the same, swift conclusion. There's a bond there, something teetering beyond friendship and veering into waters that are utterly unknown to the both of them.
By the time we arrive at the dock, Stede's brain is most comparable to a volcano close to eruption. Overwhelmed, wracked with guilt, and verging on panic. But he's with Ed, and Ed always has a plan. It'll be fine, they're together, they'll escape! But then ... Ed doesn't have a plan. The panic heightens, and he heads straight for the dock. What follows was what I can only imagine's the most poignant and sincere moment in Stede's life to date. There are the words Ed says- Stede makes him happy, being with Stede is the happiest he's perhaps ever been- which must be some over the moon level affirmation for him- but then there's the kiss.
Weeks ago, on a Spanish vessel docked in the Republic of Pirates, Edward Teach saved Stede Bonnet's life. He offered a world-weary, exhausted, knocking-on-death's-door human a care that he had never received before. Ed saw this eccentric little dude and fell in love with the whole deal- showed him that his life wasn't mere mockery and ridicule, that it could be worthy and fought for. More than anything, the dock scene offered Stede a truth: that he's capable of making someone happy.
But of course, Badminton happens. He takes Stede to those woods and is the antithesis to the speech that Edward gave him just hours before. He plays on every last one of Stede's fears, validating each one until he's crying in agreeance- heart raw as he admits aloud what his brain's been screaming for weeks: everything you touch, you taint. You're not for making people happy, you're not for bringing joy into others' lives. The final walls come crumbling, and he convinces himself that in loving Edward, he’s broken him. That he’s taken some mighty pirate and ‘reduced’ him. Stede runs away, and with the mistaken intention of saving Edward from the curse of Stede Bonnet, he instead forsakes him.
