I saw a really funny screenshot and had to write something for sasusaku ‘cause I fucking die.
Here’s a link to the post I found it on. It’s super short, just a drabble and meant to be funny but I hope you like it lol
“I Would Break You”
He hadn’t meant to say it. The words were out of his mouth before he could process them in his mind.
Suigetsu was holding his stomach, not even bothering to hide his amusement as he laughed at Sasuke’s expense. He had tried choking back on it but it burst out of him when the blonde friend of the pink haired girl slipped Sasuke a piece of paper and winked at him telling him that he would need it.
I can’t believe I fucking said that. And while in uniform.
Running his hand down his face, Sasuke sighed, attempting to compose himself. Sasuke peeked at the slip of paper and noticed a neat row of ten digits and “her name is Sakura btw.”
“Let’s go,” Sasuke grumbled heading to his patrol car. Suigetsu followed him, never ceasing in his laughter.
. .
Sasuke was barely in the station when he heard his cousin roaring with laughter. He looked over at Shisui and his brother who was biting his lip, the corners of his lips twitching upwards.
“Okay, what’s so━”
“Cuff…” Shisui gasped out, trying to contain his laughter, “oh, my god, cuff anyone today Sasuke?”
“What?”
“Just,” Shisui took a deep inhale and then exhaled out, giggling. “I would break you? Really?”
Sasuke whipped his head behind him to confront Suigetsu, but his partner was nowhere in sight. He was smart enough to get as much distance as possible from the cousins.
“You weren’t supposed to hear about that,” Sasuke hissed. “Who else knows?”
At that moment, the police chief━Fugaku Uchiha, his father━stepped out of the elevator and walked by the group of desks. He stopped right in front of Sasuke and shook his head before continuing on.
“You told dad,” Sasuke muttered, mortified. Itachi placed a hand on his shoulder in what was supposed to be sympathy, but a chuckle escaped his mouth ruining the effect. “I swear to God, none of you ever let me live.”
. .
It was hours later and Sakura was still sitting curled up on her couch with her hood over her head, the strings pulled tight as she tried to hide from the world.
“It wasn’t that bad,” Ino teased her from their kitchen. “I could have told you to say something worse.”
“I’m never making anymore bets with you again!”
“I think it’s the best thing that’s ever happened. I’m still dying at what he said.” Ino paused in her chopping as her entire frame shook from repressed laughter. “I bet he calls soon.”
Letting go of her hood strings and shaking her hood off of her head, Sakura narrowed her eyes at her best friend.
“What do you mean you bet he calls soon?”