gunpowder, gelatine

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

prev's tags are too good not to save

high school is soo funny in hindsight. the entire time you're there thinking it's the most important period of your life and then the second you're out you're like well that was fucking stupid

Reblog to give prev a fucking break holy shit y’all

never forget the universal rule of the order of things: People Will Not Read It

signs at stores? émail? menu ?? instruction ? post online ? caption with andswer to question ? group hand outs ??? street sign ??? no. The Written Word Is The Enemy

yeah well. I'll jump off that bridge when I come to it.

many of you could benefit greatly from a bit of “playing pretend”

Going back to sleep is so powerful im a huge fan of going back to sleep

are we sure the only way out is through? like. are we sure we can't just. go around

Hank Azaria as Agador in The Birdcage (1996)

i should be allowed to wear a sign around my neck that says "HAD WEIRD DREAMS LAST NIGHT DO NOT SPEAK TO ME UNLESS I SPEAK TO YOU"

never underestimate the power of granada holmes to cheer you up

giving birth sucks tbh. not only do you and the baby you’re birthing almost die, usually you shit yourself and often you tear your taint. then you have to push an organ out of your body (placenta) and if even a little of that remains in your body, you can hemorrhage to death or develop an infection that essentially rots your body from the inside out. even if you had a relatively “easy birth”, you bleed for weeks on end. even after that stops, your body and brain is changed for the rest of your life, the pregnancy leeched minerals from your bones, that can cause osteoporosis later. minor urinary incontinence is not uncommon, brain scans of people who gave birth show permanent changes in their brain, you’re never quite the same.

I say all of this not to say giving birth is disgusting but it is a harrowing and visceral experience. society downplays how fucking awful it is and makes it out to be a ~magical~ experience but it isn’t a magical transformative experience for everyone. it can be an extremely traumatic experience for someone who wanted to carry a pregnancy to term, much more so for someone who did not want to be pregnant in the first place or someone who knows their baby won’t survive the birth. anyway, abortion is a right. pregnancy and birth aren’t just inconvenient, it’s fucking awful.

I was never more firmly pro-choice than when I was in the hospital actively birthing our daughter.

Our daughter was planned, wanted, was coming into a life with two parents who were able to financially support her, health insurance and paid(!) maternity leave, with extended family and friends waiting in the wings to support all three of us. All these advantages, and I was *still* scared. And frankly, it's still fucking dangerous.

And I imagined being alone and what it would feel like if I had been forced to birth a child I couldn't adequately care for or didn't want.

No one should have to go through that.

nice things will happen but first you have to lose all hope and die 45 times

far from prudish but just got blazed porn of someone's pussy spread out so hard and up close like it's a map of the polish-lithuanian commonwealth and I'm king and grand duke sigismund II augustus inspecting his lands to plot defense against the swedes

I. Love this. 

Love it.

Oh my god

yes.

This is it, I found it, the funniest post on this entire godsforsaken website

I will never get over how brilliant this comic is. The artist could have just drawn a single image in response, but instead we have this masterpiece. The world doesn’t deserve @iguanamouth.

you go too fast for me

NGK!