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Oh Yeah, It's Gay Elf Time

@saltymaplesyrup

they/them, TES fanfic writer and lore enthusiast
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thinking abt the dremora that put a whoopee cushion on molag bal’s throne. funniest guy in TES honestly

#idk if it's canon but it's canon to me

Not only is it canon but:

- it comes from a loading screen in ESO

- the loading screen is for the PRIVATE PRISON REALM in which he's been locked up for "seven epochs" as punishment for "the Rude Cushion Incident"

- the reason you go to that realm is to beat the shit out of him so he's weakened for a summoning

- and all of this is part of a quest where Magister Dratha (yes, THAT Dratha) is trying to make herself immortal, and whoopee cushion man happens to be the Duke of Black Covenants aka one of the few dudes capable of providing immortality to a mortal contractor

In conclusion I fucking love this guy

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Let me return the favor: 3, 6 then 16 for an OC of your choice.

Make this website collapse :3

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Mwehehe, I see your challenge and I accept! OC is Saya, as per usual. OC Trauma ask game from over here.

3. Have they died before?

For Saya, this question has already been answered in this post, but in the spirit of the game I will talk about the Vestige instead, since both of them are technically Saya.

The Vestige, full name Sahyati, has quite obviously died - her story kinda begins with being kidnapped by the Worm Cult and ritually killed by Mannimarco. This first death is also the most profound, since becoming the Vestige has been... traumatic in many ways.

A lot of her journey is about struggling with identity. Even before she was the Vestige, Sahyati was trans - originally a male Ashlander born under the name Suhnayaran, she eventually left her home to search for magical means to change herself to appear as she wanted. In a way, becoming the Vestige has fulfilled this wish - the form of the Vestige is pulled along the shape of the soul, its true expression and how it wishes to be perceived. As such, she appears with the body she desires - or one that the original Sahyati desired.

After all, if the identity is tied to the soul, then what is it that makes Sahyati herself? Memories are fickle things. They can be copied, transferred, removed or made up altogether. In a way, the Vestige both is and is not the Sahyati that was - she is little more than a hollow husk filled with something that has taken those memories and made them their own.

This issue is complicated further by the fact that each death has a cost. Before she acquired Shalidor's spell of eidetic memory, Sahyati suffers from memory degradation with each death - though her body reforms perfectly every time she dies, a little bit of her memories become lost with each incarnation. Because of this, by the time Sahyati finds herself sieging Coldharbour again, there is practically nothing left in her of her past life - there's little more than echoes and faint emotions and imprints of things that she can't quite recall but that make her heart ache nonetheless. The only memories she truly, completely retains are those that take place after her death at Mannimarco's hand.

She had a little sister, once, back in the tribe. A sister that learned of her death and has thrown everything she had away to become a soldier for the Ebonheart Pact, all in a self-destructive quest to avenge Sahyati.

They meet as strangers, as she stares into a face that belongs to her elder sister - a ghost, staring back at her with her eyes - and yet when Sahyati speaks, the only thing she asks is: "I'm sorry, do I know you?"

And yet, she does. There are still wisps, blurs, half-existing recollections of the life they once had. Sahyati gets to know her again, becomes family with her again, knows herself through her little sister's stories that feel familiar but so foreign, so distant so as to not have happened at all.

At the end, she's the only family she remembers ever having.

6. What's their greatest fear?

For Saya, her greatest fear by far is being left alone. She loves strongly and she loves deeply. She is greedy, in that regard. Much of her love life is comprised of her loving someone but fearing to ever admit it because she's scared of losing them because of it - and in so doing, everyone person she's ever felt something for left her life, because she was too scared to commit.

She burns herself away like a candle. It's something that Miraak calls her out on when they fight: she does not care about the world so long as the few people in it she does care about are safe. And in a way, that's also why she's so self-destructive - because if she dies throwing herself at a hopeless task, then at least she won't live to see the people she fights for grow disillusioned with her, and she will instead remain nothing more than a fond memory within their minds.

Serana doesn't stand for it, of course, but it takes a long time to unlearn this behavior.

As for the Vestige, she already lives that nightmare every day. Being a vestige, functionally a daedra, means being immortal and living to see everyone you knew and cared about die before your eyes. Her sister dies in Coldhabour fighting to save her. Her mother and father grow old and die without her ever really calling them "mom and dad" ever again. Her lovers - and she's had many, her reincarnation didn't get her sexual inclinations out of nowhere - all disappear from her life one by one, some because of breakups, some because of death.

This may very well be the reason why Saya fears loneliness so much. Another bit of "inheritance" from her past self. But while Saya is relearning how to deal with it, the Vestige has already grown numb to it and no longer fears loss as much. It is part of life, plain and simple. With her eidetic memory, she remembers everything - every single detail, every second spent with them, every word exchanged, every touch, every sensation, every emotion.

The only thing she fears now is forgetting.

16. What's one song that makes you think of them?

For Saya, I think the one that works the most is "The Reason I Wanted To Die" by Amazarashi. I use the cover by Mochi because I prefer her voice, but the lyrics are really what hits home in this case. There are many others, but I don't think I can really quite pick out one that fits her character's psychology more.

As for the Vestige, I think the one most reflective of her melancholy is Rene Ryugasaki's cover of "Monster Song". It doesn't come with lyrics unlike the former, but it's a song about reminiscing about someone you once knew and loved, and remembering them by a song you shared - the one memory that refuses to disappear.

Thank you for the ask :)

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doomed by the narrative but not to death. doomed to survive. doomed to stay alive inside the story. doomed to never escape the narrative, not even through death. you are allowed no exit. there is no way out for you and there never was. you couldn’t die if you wanted to. the narrative has a hold on you and it won’t let go. death is too sweet a doom for you. the story has something much worse in mind. there is no way out.

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Thoughts on Ithelia and her looks? New fallen Magna Ge?

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Cali, Cali, my beloved mutual you do not know what floodgates you have just opened. And by that I mean this is the third conversation I've had about Ithelia in the past fourteen hours, so needless to say I have a lot of Thoughts on the matter.

I'll be putting all of this under a cut because most of the discussion here will contain spoilers for Necrom, for the Gold Road chapter reveal, and for a specific datamined book from said chapter.

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OCs as Song Lyrics!

Hi! Hello! This made me re-listen all the songs i have saved! Fuck!

Rules:

For your fic/current WIP, give us some lyrics that fit your OCS and NPCS-become-OCS perfectly. Do this for as many characters as you wish!

As per usual, this is for my baby Aad Semblio Impera.

Saya: take the bait - DEMONDICE

"miss so cool and untouchable, i-don't-give-a-fuck-able, better than you any day" front is a dumb stunt and damn, i got tired the chains of fame got my brain flying much higher than desired, but- "no shot! she's gonna bitch and whine about being famous?" YOU DO NOT GET TO TURN AROUND AND DEFLECT HALF WHERE THE BLAME IS

And another one from the same song

your obsession with "professionalism" is staggering what kinda lifestyle you imagining? what kind of stress do you think i'm managing? what has the algorithm handed them? RULES and we cannot abandon them- gotta shut the hell up and not say a goddamn word while the rest of the world gets to be heard? shit is absurd i'm done but i'm still learning gotta have a little fun while shit's burning

Serana: Bitter Choco Decoration - syudou

Bitter Choco Decoration I want to be all that you need, I want to make it last Bitter Choco Decoration All of my feelings and uniqueness, burn them all to ash Bitter Choco Decoration Kill my desires and my ego, put them in the ground Bitter Choco Decoration I guess I've finally grown up - hey mom, look at me now

Elra: Easier - SIAMÉS

And now it's easier And now it's easier To run away and hide Who wants to say goodbye And now it's easier It's always easier To hold your head up high than open your heart

Illia: Steal From the Rich, Give to Myself - Simon Viklund (easiest choice of them all, the song inspired the entire character to begin with)

Call me crazy, call me insane The jester and the king are one and the same The question of who really runs this freak show Will have you rattle your brain The sharpest elbows, the sharpest of minds No compensation for the honest and kind I'm digging deep to find the flaws within me Before I'm falling behind You can't control me, I can't even control myself (x2) Steal from the rich, give to myself (x4)

BONUS ROUND!

Vestige: REVIVED - Derivakat Yes I used to have a MCYT phase.

There’s nothing wrong with me, I’m better now that I’m free ‘Cause I’ve seen the other side and now I’m back where I wanna be It was thirteen and a half years I spent On that platform in hell but I’ve come back hell-bent White streak in my hair but no stress now Trade-off, that guy’s looking like a mess now Driving off the tracks, but I’m back And I’ve seen hell but this is a bit more my style I’m alive, I’m revived, I survived, you surprised? Gonna cry about it? You should see the other guy I’m returned and I’ve waited my turn A decade of time to make everything mine

Miraak: wanting, getting, wanting - DEMONDICE

Just pretend it's nothing an endless "Wanting, getting, wanting" i never stop "One thing, always one thing" I'll always keep wanting, wanting more What is a man to a king and a king to a God? What is a God to a devil putting up a facade? I need an outlet now I need to write this down
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kagrenacs

That Taddeus Cosma guy fascinates me. He's a time traveller+possibly from another reality, representing a certain organization he's not allowed to name, wearing Dwemer armor and a stupid hat. I have half the heart to think it's possible Falion met someone of this organization and mistook them as Dwemer, as it's very possible with an elf. Or they could actually have Dwemer members, if the armor is not meant to simply appear 'futuristic'. But I think it's more likely Bethesda & Zenimax did not mean for these two things to connect whatsoever.

I find the "stupid hat" comment very hilarious here because it tells us more about the sneaky bastard than literally anything he says.

He's wearing the Imperial Mananaut Cap & Goggles, Imperial mananauts being a mysterious group that existed during the Second Empire that were tasked with the exploration of reality, namely through researching the planes of Oblivion and trying to reach Aetherius.

So yeah! Time and space explorer from either the past or the future.

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I think the Vestige deserves to casually drop the fact they’ve been murdered more often

Me daydreaming about my nonexistent ESO fic exploring how the Vestige's lack of soul causes slow degradation making them forget a little bit of their past life with every single death until one day they encounter a sibling or loved one who threw their entire life away to avenge their death and is now part of the higher-ups in the alliance army, and their haunted look is answered by a confused:

"Hello, do I know you?"

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On the Origins of the Nords and the Birth of Dragons

So! This is something that has been cooking in my head ever since I saw @jiubilant's dragon headcanon post, and I feel like it is something should be shared. It's a pet theory of mine, and the core principle of it is:

Dragons are born from myths.

To back up: it is known from numerous sources that I shan't list that dragons are children/fragments borne of the Time God AKHAT, with Alduin (also known as Ald) being the first of these aspects to separate, as the existence of time naturally necessitated the existence of an end.

It is also known that gods in general are born of ideas. The most primordial form of an idea is something indescribable, not possible to define by language. A deity is born when that idea coalesces/crystallizes into a concept and separates from the greater whole that is the Aurbis. The first concept to crystallize was AKHAT, thus giving start to Time and starting the chain reaction that would lead to the birth of LKHAN and then every deity to follow.

The key takeaway here is: AKHAT = Time, dragons = children/fragments of AKHAT, therefore dragons = fragments of time. This in and of itself means rather little as far as specifics go, but it already begs the question of what, exactly, this entails and what the significance of this is.

For this, we need to understand that all of the Aurbis is made up of myths and stories. No, literally. This is a recurring motif in just about every culture present in TES. All of time is made up of myths and stories, and the first myth is the myth of the Aurbis being born, which effectively begins with the birth of AKHAT, as prior to this any attempts at imposing chronology are even more impossible than after.

Given that the world is made up of myth and magic, this means that powerful enough myths are able to permanently alter it. This is a phenomenon referred to as mythopoeia, or myth-making. An example of mythopoeia would be Mantling, an act of a mortal becoming a god by following in their footsteps. This occurs when the idea-myth that the person embodies approaches and eventually assimilates with the target deity, modifying and expanding on the myth in question.

That being said, significant enough mortals have gone on record becoming myths. The most explicit examples of this would be Ysmir and Tiber Septim. By "Ysmir" here I mean not the individual Wulfharth Ashking, but rather the so-called "composite hero" (that is, a myth consisting of the deeds of multiple individuals), incorporating myths of many mortals - namely Wulfharth, Harrald Hairy-Breeks, Hans the Fox, Pelinal, etc. With Tiber Septim, the situation with Zurin Arctus and Wulfharth both impersonating the Emperor is explicitly written out in the Arcturian Heresy and mentioned in dev Q&As, so I will not dwell on it more than is needed.

And one less obvious example of this is... Ysgramor. From the comment by Hasphat Antabolis (an in-universe historian and known persona of Kurt Kuhlmann), we can see that Ysgramor's legends span an impossible amount of time for a regular mortal to have lived. The implication here being that Ysgramor was not a single individual, but is instead himself a "composite hero" whose myths comprise multiple humans, and the one we commonly know as Ysgramor was simply the one who started the myth (same as Tiber Septim).

But that "Ysgramor was a dragon" comment at the start might've already set some gears turning. And while I can pretty confidently say that in this case, this is just MK being a shitter, there is something that adds depth to this thing.

This unhinged mess of a text is primarily a list of names, which themselves are forum references to various users ("Merry Eyesore the Elk" for example was a nickname used by MK himself) or other texts (such as the 24 Perrifs, which are a reference to "Water-Getting Girl"). However, actually reading the text reveals an underlying narrative: it is a (very rough and sporadic) retelling of the Return, and... other things? Specifically, it follows through Ysgramor's line all the way up to Borgas, the last High King to descend from him. In other words, until the myth of Ysgramor and his line is exhausted...

That is, until the final paragraph, where it picks up from the beginning - except this time, it lists dragon names. Fucked up dragon names, mind, and ones that do not follow the established patterns, but dragon names nonetheless. What's more, these dragons very clearly parallel those who came before: for example "Jeorr the Rabbit-Hawk" and "Heimnelraw the Regular Hawk" become "the Rabid-Thought", and "Heimnelraaliagus the Regular Thought". In fact, we even encounter a familiar name - "Hans the Fox" becomes "Pelinaalilargus the Pragmatist".

But perhaps most important is the leader of this dragon crew, Ysmaalithax, whose story ends with being slain by Ysgramor, and the cycle begins again - the implication being that the myth of Ysgramor and his Companions is so ingrained into Nordic culture that it transcends time.

From Nordic mythology we are already aware of the belief that the Nords hold, which is that the first Nords were born at the Throat of the World from Kyne's breath. However, combined with the actual design document for the Nords' Totemic Religion, we see that the situation may be a bit more complicated: Kyne's breath does not simply give birth to the Nords, but also leads them to the end - to Sovngarde, where heroes who have proved their worth await the "Last War" at the end of time-

-which is also the First War at the beginning of time, also known as the Ehlnofey War or the War of Manifest Metaphors, which takes place in the Dawn Era and therefore repeats every time the kalpa begins or ends. In other words, the first Nords of each kalpa are also the greatest warriors, thinkers, etc. of the previous kalpa.

Their myths do not end with their lifetime - they span multiple world cycles, imprinted upon them as a universal constant. And if a myth is imprinted so strongly... well, where do dragons come from, again? Ah right. They are fragments of Time.

AKHAT and LKHAN are twins, doubles. This much is already established. At the beginning of time, they confront each other in a war that always ends with the loss of LKHAN and the finalization of the Mundus. As per the Five Hundred Mighty yadda-yadda, it would appear that each side has its own vanguard: Shor has his mortals, meanwhile Ald has his immortals - the dragons. And yet just from the fact that they mimic each other so strongly, to the point where they almost seem like two halves of the same whole...

Olaf was Numinex, in human form!

Perhaps the least hinged but also most significant part of this theory. It is a known meme theory that Olaf One-Eye is actually the dragon Numinex, shapeshifted into a mortal and dragging back his own discarded corpse as a "slain dragon" which earned him the renown he used to become High King.

But under this theory, there is a much more convoluted but possibly interesting explanation: Olaf's myth is so ingrained into Nordic cultural history due to his role in uniting all of Skyrim and ending a Succession War that spanned centuries that Numinex was indeed Olaf - his myth, born into a dragon.

Let us draw a parallel to the Five Hundred text.

On the one hand, we have Ysgramor and Ysmaalithax. The story begins with a tale of how Ysgramor came to be in the incident of Saarthal, then taking up his role as Harbinger and leading his Companions into war until he dies and is taken to Sovngarde, only to return again at the birth-end of time. His story culminates in a confrontation with the dragon Ysmaalithax, which Ysgramor wins, thereby earning him the title Ysgramor the Returned, thus finalizing the myth and starting it all over again.

On the other hand, we have Olaf and Numinex. The story begins with a tale of how Olaf came to be in the wake of the Succession War, taking up the mantle of Jarl of Whiterun and leading his troops into war. His story culminates in a confrontation with the dragon Numinex, which Olaf wins, thereby earning him the title High King Olaf, finalizing the myth and...

...starting it all over again. Because if you recall, Olaf One-Eye also goes to Sovngarde and thus will be there at the Last War, becoming one of the first Nords. And true enough - in the Five Hundred text, there is one "Olaf the Dog, a berserker who had been to Hsaarik’s Head a thousand times or more and knew leaping magic." What's more - this Olaf's story ends with his being burned in Haafingar, which now happens every year.

But wait, what does this have to do with dragons?

Well... everything!

Dragons are fragments of time, and important myths are imprinted unto the fabric of time. From this, the natural consequence is that when dragons are born during the Dawn Era in-between kalpas, they are born from significant moments in time - from myths that spirits and mortals create and perpetuate.

If we examine the dragons under this lens, a lot of things suddenly start to make sense about them.

For example, Alduin being the firstborn god can be easily explained under this interpretation: the existence of a beginning necessitates an end, so Alduin was born to embody the End of Time. His was the very first story to be told, the story of time itself.

Another example is the odd elemental affinities of dragons. Sometimes they correspond to the basic three elements of Destruction: fire, shock, frost. But at times, there are outliers - dragons who manipulate the earth, who hide in ash-filled mountains, who swim in the waters or even breathe disease and poison. Their effects upon the world are very varied, and one might even say cataclysmic - which would make sense if these dragons were born from stories told about natural disasters!

This could also explain their desire to eat one another - if dragons are myths, then devouring other dragons would naturally incorporate those myths into that of the victor. As a result, not only does the dragon's power and wisdom broaden, but it also grows closer to usurping the ultimate myth - that of Akatosh himself, which is a desire that dragons are known to share.

So, to sum up:

  • Sovngarde and the Hall of Valor specifically are not just an afterlife. They are the repository where Shor holds his hand-picked warriors that will be at his side at the beginning of time.
  • Skyrim really does belong to the Nords - the first of them came down from Sovngarde, carried by Kyne's Breath to the Throat of the World, where they became the first of their people, bringing with them stories of their culture.
  • Dragons are born from fragments of time, which includes both universal constants and man-made stories that have become strongly ingrained into the fabric of space-time.
  • As consequence of the former, dragons can sometimes be born from significant myths, such as Numinex being born from the myth of Olaf One-Eye.

Aaand that's about it! Hope this was an enjoyable and enlightening read. Thoughts very welcome and appreciated.

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uesp

Did You Know: Rhythandius, a Doctor of Transliminal Mythomysticism, speculated that if a Soul Shriven possessed a different intrinsic Anuic aspect (besides their absent soul), and had a sufficiently high Anuic valence, that they could nearly instantly create an unflawed body from Chaotic Creatia? The Xivilai Sojourner built upon this theory by adding that this would be most likely to occur if Mundus was in jeopardy, or as the Doctor put it, “The Heart of Nirn would spontaneously generate such “paragon” individuals as a way of defending itself from destruction, in a manner analogous to the way the mortal body fights off infection.“

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caliblorn

I know that ‘die’ is missing from one of your sentences but I like to think it was directed at me lol

Anyway yes, the lore around the Vestige’s nature is very interesting and contradictory at the same time. Which is a pity because they were able to perfectly justify them coming back to life in most of the game zones. I would have loved to have a bit more dialogue and acknowledgement of that. And one thing that was really missing, in my opinion, was fighting against your reanimated corpse at some point. That would have been cool! Probably hard to pull off on a technical way tho. 

The (relatively) new Balfiera Isle tutorial expands on this actually because it seems to imply that the "Heart of Nirn" being talked about here is not the Heart of Lorkhan but the Adamantine Tower. Which would make sense, since Lorkhan is primarliy Padomaic, while the Adamantine Tower is the crux of Creation and is more broadly aligned with the Time God.

Moreover, in that tutorial it's shown that even before you lost your body and animus and got a daedric vestige shoved into your soul to replace it, you were able to absorb Skyshards. Those things are charged with Aetherial energy! Hell, the Direnni mage who's with you even suggests that the Tower itself summoned you here!

Paragon lore lives on! Now if only they explained what the fuck that actually is.

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