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Sakti Rising

@saktirising / saktirising.tumblr.com

Burn it all away, Kali
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Leaving is not enough; you must

stay gone. Train your heart

like a dog. Change the locks

even on the house he’s never

visited. You lucky, lucky girl.

You have an apartment

just your size. A bathtub

full of tea. A heart the size

of Arizona, but not nearly

so arid. Don’t wish away

your cracked past, your crooked

toes; your problems

are papier mache puppets

you made or bought

because the vendor was so

compelling you just

had to have them. You had

to have him. And you did.

And now you pull down

the bridge between your houses.

You make him call before

he visits. You take a lover

for granted, you take

a lover who looks at you

like maybe you are magic. Make

the first bottle you consume

in this place a relic. Place it

on whatever altar you fashion

with a knife and five cranberries.

Don’t lose too much weight.

Stupid girls are always trying

to disappear as revenge. And you

are not stupid. You loved a man

with more hands than a parade

of beggars, and here you stand. Heart

like a four-poster bed. Heart like a canvas.

Heart leaking something so strong

they can smell it in the street.

By Marty McConnell - Frida Kahlo to Marty McConnell

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Ode 314

Those who don’t feel this Love pulling them like a river, those who don’t drink dawn like a cup of spring water or take in sunset like supper, those who don’t want to change,

let them sleep.

This Love is beyond the study of theology, that old trickery and hypocrisy. I you want to improve your mind that way,

sleep on.

I’ve given up on my brain. I’ve torn the cloth to shreds and thrown it away.

If you’re not completely naked, wrap your beautiful robe of words around you,

and sleep.

rumi

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God, please show me how good it can get.

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This, the darkest day, makes way for the light.

But first it will grow so cold your bones forget the feeling of anything but the shiver. The skin becomes chapped and pale. In the deafening silence the mind starts to scream. It lies, sneaky little snakes that make their way in to the unguarded space where it says your fingers will never be soft again.

The moon knows well the sound of my howling.

My fists are familiar with the smell of the floor.

It takes stamina to make it through the dark.

But subtly the sun comes, and the heat. Your body will remember how to yield under its touch. Covered with sweat and fresh honey dripping from the comb, you will forget that you ever doubted,

In the long and cold winter

That the darkest day is only making way

For the light.

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Lake and Maple 

I want to give myself utterly as this maple that burned and burned for three days without stinting and then in two more dropped off every leaf; as this lake that, no matter what comes to its green-blue depths, both takes and returns it. In the still heart that refuses nothing, the world is twice-born – two earths wheeling, two heavens, two egrets reaching down into subtraction; even the fish for an instant doubled, before it is gone. I want the fish. I want the losing it all when it rains and I want the returning transparence. I want the place by the edge-flowers where the shallow sand is deceptive, where whatever steps in must plunge, and I want that plunging. I want the ones who come in secret to drink only in early darkness, and I want the ones who are swallowed. I want the way the water sees without eyes, hears without ears, shivers without will or fear at the gentlest touch. I want the way it accepts the cold moonlight and lets it pass, the way it lets all of it pass without judgment or comment. There is a lake. Lalla Ded sang, no larger than one seed of mustard, that all things return to. O heart, if you will not, cannot, give me the lake, then give me the song.

-Jane Hirshfield

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Ho hum

Here I am

Sitting on the rocks

Listening to the water fall

Longing for transformation

Still

The second yellow butterfly goes by

I didn’t know they were still alive

Here

In November.

Even Snoop is going sober.

It’s sunny and warm

And I am free

I have the daughter and the dogs of my dreams

I have everything I need to be happy.

I am ready.

I am giving up being sick.

I am giving up being sad.

I am giving up my longing.

I am giving up my story that I am anything but

Love.

So if I am god, and I can make of this life whatever I want

Why waste any more time

Feeling anything but gratitude and joy?

Karma karma karma

I’m ready.

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she told me, you don't get over it you just learn to live with it the pain never goes away but it fades.

i'm waiting for it to whisper.

now i know what it means to be born again and now i know how it feels to wonder if god has forsaken me and now i know why we lose our religion and still pray.

I want to see your face in the morning. 14 months waking up alone, except the times someone new was in my bed and i saw their face instead and i got so angry I had to wash the sheets the promises the matrix made lied to me being under someone new didn't make me get over you it just made me want you more.

you will always be the one i'm looking for.

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"hello old friend, thank you for visiting me. let me take care of you now."

Drop the story, be with the feeling.

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When things fall apart, may I be soft and allow the falling with grace.

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Dear god. I’m ready for my miracle.

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May you be happy.

May you be healthy.

May you be at peace.

May you be free.

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I’ve always been afraid my kindness would be mistaken for weakness.

I decided to be kind, anyway.

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Peace Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace: where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy.

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen.

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