I'll unalive you

Unaliver it's okay to say kill

No it's not on account of the spell the nefarious wizarder put on me

heh heh heh….

So it is you, wizarder. After all these years. My greatest nemesiser. Why did you do this to me wizarder

unaliver, i simply made you who you are. who you always should have been. i, the wizarder, will wizard and you, the unaliver, will unalive. you could never be anything else

But the two of us could have been something other than the sum of our parts, wizarder. And yet you choose to curse me, wizarder. Because you are scared of commitmenter

maybe we could be something new…if there’a still a chance… i know i’ve done wrong but… i’d unalive to try again… with you, unaliver

My lover......! ah, but no, i simply cannot trust one who would place a curse on me! I long to be in your arms but I simply cannot while I bear the mark of how we parter.

i reverse my nefarious curse, even a nefarious wizard can change his robes…come unaliver, together we can be unalovers…

Ah! Kill!! Kill!! Death!! It's so good to be able to user the common tongue anew....

Now that I have seen that you are serious about your love, I am willing to try and right our wrongs... For I admit i am not blameless in the matter of our squabble either.

as you would say, my lover…

love winners…

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Closest match: Neoneuromus ignobilis isolate Gutianshan chromosome 7 Common name: Dobsonfly

(image source)

i wish ao3 had a shuffle feature for all the fics in my 'saved for later' like pleeeease take the decision out of my hands

#it literally does tho#on the home page it'll show a couple and be like 'is it later now?' - @frodo-of-the-nine-fingers

It does?!

HOLY SHIT IT DOES

Happy Birthday AO3, the gift that never stops giving

i don't care if monday's bleak

tuesday matches wednesday's freak

thursday mispronouncing steak

it's friday, i'm in love

I know most of tumblr is thinking about the USA right now. but fuck the nz government right now too. tomorrow, the treaty principles bill, the 'worst, most comprehensive breach of Te Tiriti in modern times' is being introduced to parliament early, because there were activations planned country wide and the cowards decided to pull it forwards. fuck this government. a friend of mine had to go home early, crying. I've been in shock all day since it came out.

check on your Māori friends, e hoa mā. see what they need. see how you can help. everyday, we see and experience racism. from people around us, up to our government. community care will save us.

it passed its first reading today.

go to the hīkoi if you're in aotearoa.

sign the petition even if you're not.

when submissions open, write one.

reshare Māori peoples voices on social media.

check in on the Māori in your life. fund mutual aid for Māori. send us your aroha.

au where instead of dying airplane finishes pidw and then starts releasing increasingly insane extras catering to every kink and ship he can think of. bingge gets pissed on by a wife. xin mo ends up in someone’s ass. he writes the official a/b/o au. he’s having so much fun writing unhinged shit that his writing actually /improves/. peerless cucumber still complains about the plot (airplane please tell me sqq and lqg didn’t fuck in the ling xi caves that’s not canon right? right??) but even he admits the prose is nothing to scoff at.

once airplane has exhausted the pidm universe he just takes mobei jun out of it and has his oc fuck or be fucked by everything he can think of. bingge? already covered in the pidm extras, but he throws it in few more mobing fics for good luck. a thinly veiled airplane self insert? naturally! every single peak lord? why not? the concept of the demon realm, anthropomorphised and in need of a good dicking down? airplane's pretty proud of that one.

eventually he just becomes the chuck tingle of web novels. he’s equal parts hated and admired. some of his fans have left but a lot stay on (including cucumber-bro, of course) and he gains new fans who haven’t even read pidw and are just here for the insane porn concepts! he’s having so much fun! nobody cares how gay it’s all gotten!

it’s quick to write and it pays his bills so well he’s able to actually work on a new novel in secret. he publishes it under a different name. it has kickass world building, a tender gay romance and tasteful, well-thought out sex scenes. nobody figures out it’s written by airplane shooting towards the sky. not even cucumber-bro - not at first. he leaves a very heartfelt review, expressing his delight at finding something well written with a great protagonist and fascinating monsters that doesnt become a disgusting tropey mess like ANOTHER web novel he could mention!! and then there’s another message tacked on, shyly admitting that the romance has helped him come to terms with his own sexuality. airplane is equal parts genuinely touched and cackling with trollish glee. he HAS to reveal his identity. the resulting meltdown goes down in fandom history. airplane gets a best friend and ( maybe?? ) a boyfriend out of it.

he never stops writing the mobei jun porn.

hey guys we can all agree its like, incredibly sad and fucked up when a trans man feels like he has to apologize for being a man, right. like even jokingly. it’s very concerning that people have created an environment where a trans person is expected to be apologetic about their identity, right.

“sorry to add another straight white male to the world 😔” no brother I’m glad you exist. being able to live your life as YOU is something you had to and will continue to fight for and we can’t afford to be apologetic about it. trans existence is always a celebration.

This was the way I felt back when I was transitioning and it sucked. TERF-ass talking points about trans man were rife Everywhere online to me then. I used to joke about it felt like climbing into a burning trash can on purpose.

And you know what. Not only was it miserable, it's fucking bullshit. Being a man is a wonderful and beautiful thing to be. Being a man ain't inherently Evil or Bad. We shouldn't be out here inventing binary essentially 2: It's Reversed Now So It's Good Actually.

Being a mans beautiful. Bein' masc rules. You got folk in this world I promise will gas you up and celebrate you livin', and folks who make you feel cruddy about it aint worth apologizin' to.

And until people stop saying that stuff about cis men, the pain will never stop. It isn't enough to just carve out some sort of exemption for trans men, that will not work. You have to actually stop.

The idea that men are inherently cruel and violent is actually an important support of patriarchal thinking. It simultaneously strips men and boys of any aspects of their humanity that can't be used as tools of dominance, and excuses the violence and cruelty of the patriarchy and the individual men willingly reinforcing it by positioning it as natural, universal, and inevitable. But there is nothing natural, universal, or inevitable about misogyny. Misogyny is taught, not inherent.

Of course, misogyny is baked into our culture. Its influence is vast and insidious. It takes time and effort to unlearn, and much like with other societally reinforced, hierarchy-reinforcing prejudices, the work of unlearning it may last your entire life. But acting as though the prejudices a person absorbs makes them inherently tainted or evil is incredibly counterproductive, because it turns the work of dismantling that thinking in yourself and others into a flat, emotionally charged, usually useless and time-wasting attempt to either prove yourself Good or atone for being Evil.

Part of holding men accountable is recognizing they can be decent human beings, fully capable of engaging with other human beings with consideration and respect, and pointing out when they are choosing not to be. We can't do that if we pretend there's no choice being made.

And part of fighting the patriarchy is recognizing and breaking the restrictions it places on human expression, emotion, and identity, regardless of gender.

ok last thing. but what people fundamentally need to get through their heads is the significance of gaza fundraisers not being the same as like mutual aid when you're helping someone get groceries, because it is a genocide. there is insane deliberate scarcity and prices are unmanageable, because there is nowhere nearly enough for everyone, so only people who can pay can eat. and what positioning individual fundraisers as the only course of action does is quite simply give a tiny percentage of random people whose fundraisers take off the ability to pay those prices while thousands of others can't. and every one of those thousands of people without a fundraiser is suffering through the same inconceivably horrific reality. it is giving a few completely desperate people out of hundreds of thousands a slightly more favorable position in a horrific war economy of imposed scarcity. and what grassroots community kitchens do is try to mitigate in some small way that inconceivable hierarchy of who can pay and who can't, by stretching ingredients as far as they can last to cook meals at large scale and give them out at no cost. and obviously people are still going to send money to their friends and families because this is hell what else are we supposed to do but please just think about that before promoting endless individual fundraisers as somehow the most ethical way to help

Operation Olive Branch has a spreadsheet dedicated to mutual aid, local distro, community kitchens, etc. in Gaza.

This is a good place to start if seeking to donate to a community resilience action. Just contact the group(s) directly to make sure they are still active. Life in Gaza and Palestine is full of uncertainty.

My Buddhist friend was stopped by a Christian fellowship and asked if she would consider following the word of Jesus Christ. She replied, “No, thanks, but maybe next time around.” I don’t think they got the joke but I nearly died laughing.

AITA?

So a bunch of teenagers were outside my unit from 2 to 4AM this morning honking their horn over and over again. I haven't slept in about three days for various reasons, so I opened my window and said "Hey, can you stop? We need to sleep", to which one responded, "Go to sleep, then", an honked the horn.

This move struck me as so ludicrously inconsiderate and stupid that I started laughing despite myself, and just managed to hear, "Yeah, I thought that was pretty fucking hilarious".

Cut to about a minute and a half later, I am running down the street in nothing but combat boots, sweatpants, and a binder, and these litte turds are gunning it.

I have no plans to hurt anybody, or even catch up with them, but as they turn the corner off the end of my road I stop in the middle of the street and stare after them, motionless, hands on my hips under a streetlight like Tboy Mike Myers in one of the worse sequels.

I didn't have my glasses on, but it looks as though the driver looked back in my direction before they turned out of view.

Was scaring the shit out of a bunch of dumb city kids a dick move, or was this justified?

The roads were otherwise empty, and it was a Wednesday.

Im not the only tenant in this complex, just th only one who responded.

AITA?

In my defense the alternative was homicide

If you caught up to them, what was the plan?

Other than the potential answer to that, NTA.

I assume the answer is something harmless like run up to the side windows and screech like an angry creatute while waiving your arms around like one of those wacky inflatable fellows, before eventually settling on some form of "okay I'm done" body language and strutting away.

In those situations, never get directly in front of the car, and if you go behind be ready to leap at the first sign of reverse lights.

I hate to give away my favourite techniques but my ripcord for situations like this is to say a random date in the future like "August 22nd 2039" and then walk away without another word

The only acceptable form of micromanagement.

can't even jerk off because i'm thinking about the horrors of society

fucked up vampire who sucks COCKS instead of blood. ha ha. I Will Just Say Anything On This Website

challenge: there is a trans man. he is pre-medical transition. you must not infantilize him. go.

when I was in high school my dad was speeding like crazy because I was running late to my job at the cemetery. and the cop who pulled him over gave him three whole tickets because who the hell goes 95 in a 25??? but then, when my dad went to court the cop didn’t show, and so the judge looked over at the charges and just couldn’t believe it. he thought the cop must’ve been so racist that he made it up because who the hell goes 95 in a 25? so my dad got all 3 tickets dismissed bc of racism. that he didn’t even experience because he was in fact going 95 in a 25.

to clarify. my dad used to be a cab driver in ny and he also grew up in india so he just drives like a dickhead.

It's baby waddle dee season! as the weather gets cooler, baby dees will typically travel in groups to find a heat source they can cuddle up to.

They are completely harmless, however, these guys can really cling onto clothes! make sure to keep a waddle dee roller around so no stray dees will be stuck on you all day!

As for setting the dees free, you can return them to the king or to the nearest adult waddle dee.

[This has been a Dreamland PSA]

science fiction as a genre was invented specifically to show lesbians some greasy sweaty women in tank tops fixing machinery