still thinking about @evilwizard 's concept so I, make a fake book cover about it I guess
the post:
character concept: hardboiled detective who uses a vast underground network of trained rats to solve mysteries and track down criminals
P.I. Ed Piper
BWAHAHAHA yes!! he even has a pipe!!!
What if someone actually wrote this
shaking hands shaking hands with you nodding nodding
just for this, here's a quick piper in all his colorized glory!
Eu fiz essas ilustrações durante o Dia dos Namorados de 2022, eu amo demais esse projeto! "Uma moça inteligente e determinada, que para salvar seu pai de uma dívida, vai trabalhar na mansão de um jovem veterano da Segunda Guerra, recluso e amargurado pelas cicatrizes em seu rosto devido ao campo de batalha." >>> I made these during brazilian's Valentine's Day 2022, and I love it so much! "An intelligent and determined lady, to save her father from a debt, decides to work on a manor of a young, World War II vet, recluse and bitter due to the scars in his face caused by the battlefield."
i will read warlord content if its about calanthe
Mad. Yes. I want this.
the conflict of how do you comprehend that someone you love and who loves you has an agenda of violence; that that violene is what gave you luxury; that you would never know about this or care about this is it wasn’t forceibly put upon you to deal with it; what does it mean to love your kingdom but your kingdom is built on death; etc etc
i would structure it first with the pov of Calanthe’s mother (no idea if she’s ever given an in-text mother) witnessing her lioness daughter rise to military power. let’s also pretend calanthe’s mother was also a military might. then thru pavetta’s pov; then ciri’s. that way we an have a nice intergenerational destablization of Cintran female authority. i will make at least 7 digs at #girlboss culture while im at it
Mad your brain!!!!!!!!
t shirt that says “HENRY DAVID THOREAU’S MOM DID HIS LAUNDRY”
not that i’d actually wanna live in a different time period, thanks very much, but also lately im vibing the idea of being born hundreds years ago when an army trudges through my city and kills all my loved ones and i must assume a male disguise in order to seek revenge in this male-dominated society so i cut my hair short and slick it back and join the army and learn how to use a big heavy broadsword and i soon have a reputation as a great swordsman which is only overpowered by my reputation as a great lover despite the fact i never take all my clothes off but i still manage to get all the women and the other guys in my regiment can’t figure out how i’m so good with them but i just gotta shrug and play up the ladies man thing until one day i meet a princess of the blood and im charged with protecting her on a journey out of the capital but we get separated from the rest of the regiment and i start developing feelings for her because she’s spunky but i know It Can Never Be for a number of reasons and then one night she catches me bathing in the moonlight and i instinctively draw my sword because No One Can Know My Womanly Secret but also she’s the princess and also also now i’m in love with her so i simply hand the sword over but she throws it aside with a clatter and throws herself at me and we make love by the lakeside and the next day i put on my soldiers gear and we keep moving wondering what the future will hold when the enemy horde comes upon us and i defend her but am outnumbered when suddenly our separated guards catch up and we fight the invaders and i kill the man who slaughtered my family because he is conveniently part of this regiment and we’re all happy for our victory but i still look sadly at the princess because It Can Still Never Be and i must take her to the capital to meet her betrothed and we kiss and make love sadly in a tent one last time but then we finally reach the city it turns out her fiance is a huge Gay too and has a huge entourage of gays following him around and brushing lint out of his fur coats and he hires me to be the queen’s bodyguard wink wink nudge nudge and i meet her nightly using a secret passageway under the castle and also i get a really cool new sword and history doesnt remember me as anything more than a friend to the queen until centuries later when a bunch of love letters are found in a secret compartment under the castle by a lesbian librarian who was researching the local history and she falls in love with the lady castle tour guide as they bond over an interest in our love story the end
OP you just wrote a whole ass novel get that published
Why would you hide this gem in the tags
You’re right. It’s true and I should say it
OP POST THAT MOTHERFUCKING NOVEL
Forget posting. WRITE AND SELL.
This! This is how they should advertise period products!
This is how it’s done. Screw that blue liquid and twirling in white dresses in a shower of flowers. Just *punch a man in the face*, “buy tampons.” *punch another man in the face*
Tagline - Tampons: not just for bullet holes.
Ok, so consider this: a novelization of Jupiter Ascending, written in the style of everyone’s first fanfic.
