certified disaster bi

bad greek myth concept: a siren but she only sings despacito

her name is alexa

khajiit has wares to sell

im used to reading y/n as “Yes/No” so whenever i see those celebrity imagines where they call the reader y/n i take it as being a multiple choice answer

“Markiplier slaps your ass so hard it pops [YES / NO]”

Going to the DMV

My favorite thing is when Superman lets people shoot him with this completely unimpressed face like “okay if it makes you feel better.” until he just calmly takes the guns away.

#it’s fun to point out when superman appears in gotham the criminals never shoot him whereas someone WILL shoot in metropolis#which is hilarious#because it’s like gotham’s bad guys have heard so many things about superman#they nearly respect him#but in metropolis it’s like ‘we know you can’t get hurt but FUCK you anyway’#do you think bruce holds a low-key grudge because gotham’s rogues don’t give hell to clark#‘hey bruce wanna assist me with something in metropolis? would love your detective take on this’#‘i don’t know clark why don’t you ask for the riddler’s help since you two have been hitting off so well lately’  (via justiceleaque)

Okay, that’s a funny headcanon, but….

I cant fucking breathe

if we still wanna go by this headcanon, though, then they’re shooting at Bruce but not Clark

I don’t feel so gucci mr.stark

this was all i could think about making when playing the game, i was quoting it the whole time

*romantically calls you dude*

*platonically calls you babe*

Romantically calls you dude: Aries, Sagittarius, Aquarius, Gemini, Capricorn, Virgo

Platonically calls you babe: Taurus, Leo, Libra, Scorpio, Pisces, Cancer

helLOO im the nostalgia critic, i have killed before and i will kill again

I just want to know who read the Archie comics and was like yes you know what this needs? more gang violence and murder

this bitch is in a gang now

radio announcer voice: okay next up we got john lennon’s ghost with “i deserved to die for walking like that” stay tuned on fuckFM for more hit songs

commercial: i cum every day now that i went to the furniture sale

hmmm

where is he. i know he’s there where the fuck is he.