Leaving My Abusive Partner GoFundMe Project
www.gofundme.com/wingsofsurvival Here’s everything you need to know about my situation and why I need your help: 1. I have survived an entire childhood of abuse. I’ve finally decided to go No Contact with my mother and I’m free from her. I’m gonna be doing the same thing with this man. 2. My partner and I met in 2011 and he was abusive even then. I had only moved in with him to escape my abusive mother. 3. We had a baby and he was nice to me while I was expecting, so I thought he was a good man who just got angry at times. But he was emotionally abusive in ways that I didn’t yet recognize. 4. I began to realize that I absolutely could not deal with this forever when I saw how uninvolved he was with his own beautiful and perfect baby. I took it as ignorance and figured he’d grow into his role of fatherhood. He didn’t. 5. He yells at the baby all the time, scaring him. When the baby reacts, he tells him to “Stop fake crying.” This is very similar to how he reacts to any thoughts or feelings that I express in the relationship. He invalidates our feelings so that he doesn’t have to take responsibility for them. He must always appear to be “the good guy” and he must control every situation and conversation. So now I just don’t talk. 6. I called the police on him both times that he was physically abusive so he knows better than to do that anymore. I’m not just “letting it happen”. He just slams things now to terrify us whenever we are here. And no, he doesn’t care that he scares the baby. 7. He gaslights, lies to everyone and has a split personality so I can’t stay and argue. He invalidates every single thing that I say when I open my mouth. Even things I’m obviously right about that are just random topics. He has no respect for me and tries to make me doubt myself. He literally laughs at me when I cry or show any emotion at all. I caught on and stopped showing them. Now he’s even worse and that’s why I ended things for the second and LAST time. 8. It used to work when I still loved him, but I don’t anymore. Without the love goggles, I see myself and him more clearly. That’s why I decided to end the relationship. 9. Now I need to move out. However, I don’t have childcare for my baby, don’t have a place to stay and need money for travel. I don’t have the time or safety to just stay here and save up either. My baby is stressed out because now that I’ve ended things (I HAD to in order for him to realize I’m not going to have sex with him), he’s in a horrible mood and tries to intimidate us both. It’s very hard to downplay your reaction to someone who is scaring your baby. Due to alienation I don’t have reliable friends here and my mom obviously doesn’t care. I have called every shelter, the abuse foundations - there aren’t funds or housing for mothers in my state at this time. The shelter in the state that I am going only accepts mothers who’s abuser lives in the same state. (It’s like…. do they wanna help victims or not) 10. My close friends mother has a daycare in her home and would be able to watch my son while I work. My friend also can get me a job in her company, because I have the credentials. The rent is much cheaper where she lives. So there is hope here. I can survive this, I just have to get there. 11. I will need to fly there, get a studio apartment and work hard to save up. I’ll need to buy a used car for the commute to and from work. That’s what the GoFundMe campaign is for. 12. I made an Instagram @wingsofsurvival for the campaign, but I am going to keep it for victims suffering through what I’m dealing with now. I will continue to come up with new ideas and ways to support people who have dealt with these things. 13. I am not ashamed of the things that other people have done to me. You do not need to feel shame for their actions. I want to be an example to anyone suffering right now that you can get out. I understand that not everyone has money to donate and that’s okay. Sharing it is free! The more people know, the more awareness we raise for my campaign and other victims, the smaller the donations can be for everyone, the quicker me and my baby can get out of here. It’s always easier when we work together. I want every woman to find their wings of survival. www.gofundme.com/wingsofsurvival If you have anymore questions, just message me.
