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From Now until the darkness claims us

@rayonfrozenwings / rayonfrozenwings.tumblr.com

Please DO NOT REPOST my creations (art/edits/etc)
Instagram: @rayonfrozenwings
AO3: @rayonfrozenwings
SJM, Nessian, Elorcan, Theories
Tracking: #usernay
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rowaelinsmut

I’m back.

it’s obviously going to take about 5000 years to set this blog back up. but. i’m here. hi, hello. i’ve missed you. i never should have deleted my account after kingdom of ash.

how is everyone? tell me your stories in the two plus years.

KAYLA!!!!! You’re back!!!! I’m lazy and not here much and life is chaotic. But I’m excited you are back for the shit storm that is a sjm release. 😂🤣🤣🤣

OMG RENEEEEEEE. i’ve missed you terribly; thank you for the welcome, lovely. <3 

ahaha, a bit sad i missed the hoeab release chaos but i’m sure this next one will be *controversial*. 

yeah, how’s this wild covid world treating you? how’s the kiddos? the family? the everything?

Of course! So in Nz Covid is this annoying thing that keeps popping up “randomly” and we can’t leave the island unless there is a lot of money involved and you can’t come back because quarantine hotels are all booked up. So that’s - weird. But other than that we are weirdly almost normal. which i feel a little guilty about.  hoeab was a lot of dislike and a lot of like in fandom. bit divided i felt. I was Meh about it - some cool parts but I’m yet to make a judgement. But I didn’t love SJM’s ACOTAR1 and TOG1 sooooo its possible I don’t like how she starts things…

ACOFS will be controversial. First its missing a letter. Who ruins a pattern? The covers don’t match the old ones. Its no longer YA so that means some happy and some not happy people. Can’t please everyone. And the Nesta hate and love is intense in fandom so this is gonna be an interesting story for both sides I reckon. There will be a lot of Hot Takes. 

I still haven’t preordered it which is leaving things late for me - but im like still disappointed with cc a little. 

annnnd what else….. Oh kids are good - Older, D1 was meant to start school during Covid but …. Covid…. so that was delayed but other than that she is loving it now and growing up so fast. D2 is also doing great and is my little mathematician + mummys boy and I love those cuddles. and yeah. I’m still not sure what im doing with my career but workin part time in kindy’s so that is very fun.  How about you? fam? life? etc

Also followers - this is your update too coz ive been MIA for a wee while hahahahaha.

nz has been handling this so brilliantly - i applaud your government! we’re all very proud. canada do be struggling, we’re starting our second lockdown officially tomorrow as my province consistently gets over 1000 new cases a day. we never flattened the curve as naturally alberta is the usa of canada.

yeah, i’m in a few groups on fb so i get to see all the tea. hoeab was fine, but yeah, waiting for that big turning point like with maf. the covers are growing on me - i mean acosf is weird but it’s not dreadful. i’m hoping there will be *meaning* revealed behind the design choice ahah. i don’t think the art fits the world but maybe in an adult world… it might? who knows. i’ll be waiting lol.

i’ve preordered like a billion signed copies (because in the last two years i started collecting books and now have just a bonkers collection of rare/pretty/exclusive/limited edition books). all my sjm books are signed. it’s magical. so are all my red rising ones because i got to meet Pierce Brown last year for Dark Age!! best day ever,

glad to hear about the kiddos and the working. sounds like you’ve got your hands full!!

uhhh, well covid put me in a temporary lay-off since april 20th so i spent a few days getting rip-roaring drunk and then started to plan going to university. which i am doing, just finishing up my first term of a four year degree. planning to major in either history or anthro and minor in classics. i thought i was going to straight major in history but i’ve got the worst prof right now so she’s turning me against it and turns out, anthro is super interesting. still married, still have a dog and cat (two cats now). hubs is good, working his ass off. did some travelling. was supposed to go to Scotland this year but alas, covid. i’ve read 35 books this year lol. shameful. i’ve honestly been super depressed cus mental health is a thing. i came out as bisexual so yay, being open about mental health, sexuality, going off about social issues, having family block me cus they’d rather be racist cunts. it’s been a lot, especially this year. otherwise… my book is in draft two stages! but with uni, i’m a lot slower. and i’ve been playing assassin’s creed valhalla on and off since it came out the other week but again, uni has not allowed me to beat it. and i rebuilt my pc recently and it’s *rainbow*. 

uhhhh and that’s my whole life story rip

OMG! SO Much!!

Vahalla looks soo good I was watching someone play on twitch the other day. I miss gaming so much but I do not have the money to drop on a PC powerful enough to play games. hahahaha. 

ANTHRO IS SOOOO INTERESTING - totally regret not taking it earlier in my degree, I did one paper and it was amazing and I did well and was like - well FUCK me why didnt I find this sooner. But Classics is also good, as a classics major I approve. haha. tho I really just did classics for the stories and art, philosophy was hard but rewarding and the history part I managed to mostly avoid through luck. hahaha. Perks of having a small classics department and cross-crediting art history papers. I’m a bad person but I basically spent my degree reading books and talking about them. That is so exciting that you get to do that tho - annoying about the job but exciting about new adventure.

Covid is such a shit show. I’m so sorry you guys have another lockdown, I really hope a vaccine comes out soon so people who aren't assholes and could easily get sick can do things too. 

And book collection sounds fun! I am accidently collecting them, but only with KoA so far. It was an accident I swear. I had to get a signed one. 

and PB better get those next books out soon. iron age was not a cliffhanger i enjoyed.

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rowaelinsmut

I’m back.

it’s obviously going to take about 5000 years to set this blog back up. but. i’m here. hi, hello. i’ve missed you. i never should have deleted my account after kingdom of ash.

how is everyone? tell me your stories in the two plus years.

KAYLA!!!!! You’re back!!!! I’m lazy and not here much and life is chaotic. But I’m excited you are back for the shit storm that is a sjm release. 😂🤣🤣🤣

OMG RENEEEEEEE. i’ve missed you terribly; thank you for the welcome, lovely. <3 

ahaha, a bit sad i missed the hoeab release chaos but i’m sure this next one will be *controversial*. 

yeah, how’s this wild covid world treating you? how’s the kiddos? the family? the everything?

Of course! So in Nz Covid is this annoying thing that keeps popping up “randomly” and we can’t leave the island unless there is a lot of money involved and you can’t come back because quarantine hotels are all booked up. So that’s - weird. But other than that we are weirdly almost normal. which i feel a little guilty about.  hoeab was a lot of dislike and a lot of like in fandom. bit divided i felt. I was Meh about it - some cool parts but I’m yet to make a judgement. But I didn't love SJM’s ACOTAR1 and TOG1 sooooo its possible I don't like how she starts things...

ACOFS will be controversial. First its missing a letter. Who ruins a pattern? The covers don’t match the old ones. Its no longer YA so that means some happy and some not happy people. Can’t please everyone. And the Nesta hate and love is intense in fandom so this is gonna be an interesting story for both sides I reckon. There will be a lot of Hot Takes. 

I still haven't preordered it which is leaving things late for me - but im like still disappointed with cc a little. 

annnnd what else..... Oh kids are good - Older, D1 was meant to start school during Covid but .... Covid.... so that was delayed but other than that she is loving it now and growing up so fast. D2 is also doing great and is my little mathematician + mummys boy and I love those cuddles. and yeah. I’m still not sure what im doing with my career but workin part time in kindy’s so that is very fun.  How about you? fam? life? etc

Also followers - this is your update too coz ive been MIA for a wee while hahahahaha.

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rowaelinsmut

I’m back.

it’s obviously going to take about 5000 years to set this blog back up. but. i’m here. hi, hello. i’ve missed you. i never should have deleted my account after kingdom of ash.

how is everyone? tell me your stories in the two plus years.

KAYLA!!!!! You’re back!!!! I’m lazy and not here much and life is chaotic. But I’m excited you are back for the shit storm that is a sjm release. 😂🤣🤣🤣

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heya, welcome back! Tumblr did some "updates" to their policy, no nsfw stuff and making some blogs explicit without asking. so if this one isn't completely new it might get marked as explicit. just a heads up - tho u prob know a little of whats been going on coz it feels like its everywhere lol . :) (no need to answer publicly or anything just wanted to give u a heads up) :)

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Yeah, @lyannablackbeak was keeping me up to date with tumblr’s shit. Fortunately, fic is still allowed and as the goddess of sin, the heir of smut and angst, I can still do my thing. Thanks lovely! I’ve missed you.

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true true, a place for people to find refuge and read all the goodness when there’s nothing to look at.  :D.  missed u to. <3

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what are some of your favourite rowan quotes?

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Oh gods, ALL OF THEM? HAHAHA, okay, I’ll pick a couple.. let’s seeeee…

RENEE IT IS IMPOSSIBLE I AM LITERALLY QUOTING THEM ALL HOW MANY IS TOO MANY THE ANSWER IS NONE WHEN IT COMES TO ROWAN AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

My all time favourite is this one (it’s a long one):

“I missed you,” he said quietly, his gaze darting between her mouth and eyes. “When I was in Wendlyn. I lied when I said I didn’t. From the moment you left, I missed you so much I went out of my mind. I was glad for the excuse to track Lorcan here, just to see you again. And tonight, when he had that knife at your throat …” The warmth of his callused finger bloomed through her as he traced a path over the cut on her neck. “I kept thinking about how you might never know that I missed you with only an ocean between us. But if it was death separating us … I would find you. I don’t care how many rules it would break. Even if I had to get all three keys myself and open a gate, I would find you again. Always.” 

Second top choice:

“I love you. There is no limit to what I can give to you, no time I need. Even when this world is forgotten whisper of dust between the stars, I will love you.”

Another: 

“Even when we’re apart tomorrow, I’ll be with you every step of the way. And every step after—wherever that may be.”

Another: 

“I see you. I see every part of you. And I am not afraid.”

Another:

“Thank you for the oil,“ he added. “My skin was a little dry.”

Another: 

“I spent centuries wandering the world, from empires to kingdoms to wastelands, never settling, never stopping—not for one moment. I was always looking toward the horizon, always wondering what waited across the next ocean, over the next mountain. But I think … I think that whole time, all those centuries, I was just looking for you.” 

Another:

“The three others whirled for Rowan, and there was nothing he could do to get to that fuse. To save the queen who held his heart in her scarred hands.”

Lol another:

“From tears to sass in a few minutes. I’m glad the month apart hasn’t dimmed your usual good spirits.” 

ANOTHER:

“If you’re a monster, I’m a monster”

OKAY LAST ONE OTHERWISE I’LL BE HERE FOREVER (not a bad thing tbh) and I made it a SAD ONE BECAUSE FEELS:

“Where is Aelin? Where is my wife?” 

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Omg Kayla I love you! Also all the feels in those lines. I just felt like some Rowan love as I read Heir of Fire. 🔥

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Two sets of FMK but you choose who is in each set. If you’d kindly. . . The Cadre👏👏*tips hat*

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OHHH, I like these odds okay.

Rowan - MARRY THE FUCK OUT OF HIM. 

Fenrys - Fuuuuuuuuuck

Gavriel - Marry

Vaughan - Kill cus I am not even sure he exists LOL

Connall - ALSO KILL

Lorcan - Fuuuuuuuck

Send me FMK from ANY fandom

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Lorcan and fenrys would be good fucks. Good choice.

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A Promise of Secrets II

Author’s note: I don’t know if it’s acceptable to be turned on by my own writing but I don’t fucking care. NSFW-ish.

Word Count: 3,194

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Human, Party, House Party, Drinking, Swimming Pools, Alternate Universe - After College/University, Teasing, Temptation, Club, Dancing, Sexy

Chapter II: Secrets

Previous Chapters: I

Aelin settled back in her seat and closed her eyes, her lips curving upwards in a small smile. The tension had eased from her shoulders when she was out of sight of that piercing pine-green stare. It wasn’t a bad tension exactly, but Aelin had felt wound so tight that she might combust if there was no release.

And there hadn’t been, at least, not in that sense. Of course, it was a huge assumption to make that Rowan would be interested in her like that.

She had thrown up in his pool, after all.

But the way he tended to her, offering to let her and Lysandra stay because it was safer than going. The burning intensity of his gaze and the promises she’d seen written across his face when he spoke of knowing ones’ limits…

Aelin shook her head and cursed inwardly. She was getting too far ahead of herself. It wasn’t as though she had even gotten Rowan’s number. A stupid move on her part, to leave it so open-ended.

“Earth to Aelin,” a bored voice interrupted her wandering and slightly inappropriate thoughts.

She opened her eyes and gave a halfhearted glare at her cousin who had stopped at a red light and was looking back at her with interest.

“Where did you go just then? I’ve asked you the same question three times.”

Aelin stuck her tongue out and Lysandra answered for her.

“She’s daydreaming of what Rowan’s hands might feel running over her b-“

“Shut it, Lys,” Aelin retorted much too quickly, which caused Lysandra to burst into laughter.

Aedion, protective as ever, merely shook his head in disbelief and mild concern.

“You don’t even know the guy, Aelin. He could be into some freaky shit. What if he’s a sadist? Do you like being humiliated and hurt?”

Aelin glared at her cousin, “Rowan was a perfect gentleman last night when he was taking care of me and you,” she rounded on Lysandra who was suddenly stone-faced now that Aelin’s temper had appeared, “and this morning there were no indications of anything like that!”

Lies.

She had felt that dominating presence, squirmed under his heavy watchful gaze this morning at breakfast. He hadn’t given anything away but he had been pleasant enough to give her no reason to think he might be a sadist.

She couldn’t speak for anything else, though.

The prospect of that did not frighten her as much as it perhaps should have. A delicious tingle crawled down her spine instead. She wondered indeed what Rowan’s hands might feel like, roving over her body and possibly bringing her to places she didn’t know she was capable of going physically.

She had been with one man before, Chaol, and while it had fell to pieces in the span of a week, Aelin still desired to be worshipped. To be held and touched. But while offers for companionship had come her way over the last several months, no one had piqued her interest quite enough to bring it to that next level.

It was silly, really. Her mind was out of control this morning.

Aedion tapped Aelin’s knee from the front seat.

“Are you even listening?”

Aelin stuck her tongue out again, directing it towards her cousin. Aedion huffed and fell silent. She knew he meant well but he was overreacting based on whatever assumptions he had on where her head was at. It’s not like anything had happened.

Yet.

“No more arguing. We should go shopping for dresses so we can go to that new club tonight. The one that just opened up. I feel like dancing,” Lysandra said, mercifully easing the tension in the car.

“Don’t you think you partied enough what with last night? You didn’t even make it home.”

“Aedion, why are you always so grumpy? Come on, let your hair down and we’ll get you something pretty to wear,” Aelin teased, trying to let go of the animosity radiating between them.

Aedion sighed heavily in defeat, ‘Fine. Where do you want to go shopping?”

“I know just the place,” Lysandra offered with a wicked grin.

~.~.~.~.~

“You call these clothes? I don’t even know if half of this classifies as a shirt let alone a dress.” Aedion was complaining as the girls went through the various displays, pulling different dresses in any shade of colour they could find.

Aelin grinned, holding up a tiny red number that she was certain, even with her lithe form, would not cover much of her at all. “Aedion, this would look just darling on you. Be a dear and go try it on.”

Aedion glared at her before stalking off to find the men’s section, taking the hint.

Lys grabbed Aelin’s arm, careful not to nudge the towering stack of clothing in her arms only to drag her to the changing rooms, clearly deciding that no more options were necessary.

After twenty or so minutes and some grumbling from Aedion, Aelin had finally chosen a dress. When she had shown Lys, her only comment had been, “what is your obsession with gold?”

Aelin chose not to answer, only because she didn’t really have one. It just complimented her features well and she liked looking like liquid gold.

It helped that it was also quite eye-catching.

For the remainder of the day, Aedion and Aelin managed to keep their tongues in check and there were no further arguments. They were able to enjoy their day, eating and lounging at the home they all shared together before they deemed it an appropriate time to get ready and head out.

~.~.~.~.~

Aelin, Lysandra and Aedion were deposited by their uber driver in front of the newly opened club. Aelin let out a low whistle as she beheld the classy décor outside of the club. It was simple but obviously high end, given the red velvet ropes corralling what must have been hundreds of people into neat and orderly lines and the bouncers who looked more like body guards, holding and checking their clipboards with the wireless comms decorating their ears.

The name of the club, Mistward, was mounted on the wall, written in a flowing cursive font with a back-light slowly pulsating behind it.

Aelin nudged Lysandra’s hip and cocked a questioning brow.

“This place is fancy. Where did you hear about it?”

Lysandra took in the building too before answering, “I can’t remember, but I feel like I should know… I was probably drunk.”

Lysandra have a playful grin and pulled Aelin after her, Aedion already standing in line with his arms crossed, looking for all the world like he was about to get his teeth pulled out at the dentist.

“Cheer up, cousin. This should be fun,” Aelin offered, patting him on his heavily muscled arm in a mockery of consolation.

Aedion rolled his eyes. “I’m just surprised you can’t think of anything better to do with your time. You were just at a party last night and now you’re here?”

Aelin stuck her tongue out at her cousin, “I certainly do have better things to do but you would miss my stunning personality and my quick wit.”

Aedion finally broke into a grin. “Someone thinks highly of themselves. And that tongue of yours is going to get you in trouble someday.”

“I have to, in order to keep up with your sass and you never mind about my tongue.”

Lysandra linked arms with both Aelin and Aedion, “Enough you two. Let’s just have fun.”

“If we ever get in,” Aedion complained, eyeing the long line ahead of them.

“Maybe we could flash the bouncer,” Lys offered, a mischievous smile gracing her full lips.

“Maybe Aedion should, he could find men attractive, you know.”

“No one is flashing anyone, look.”

The bouncer was coming towards them, an aura of agitation stalking along with him.

“You three,” he snapped, “you’ve been moved to the front of the line.” He then stalked away, taking his aggression with him and not checking to see if they were following.

Aelin’s brows rose and she looked to Aedion and Lys who both wore the same confused expressions on their own faces.

“Well, I suppose we better follow the man.” And Aelin slid under the velvet rope with her companions in tow.

When they reached the door, the man ushered them in and immediately, it was as though they were in another world. The pulsing from the heady beats from the sound system reaching them from even the entrance. The smoky atmosphere from the various fog machines around the dance floor mingled with the coloured strobe lights and Aelin could swear she was drunk off of the sensory assault alone.

They walked down the stairs, the lights glinting off the metallic gold of Aelin’s dress the rested high enough on her thighs that it could be indecent if she bent over.

Could be was the key word, just enough to tease but never enough to be improper.

She fixed the spaghetti straps on her shoulders and stalked down the remainder of the steps, her swagger and confidence taking over from the confusion of their sudden and unexplained admittance.

“Shall we dance or drink first?” Lys asked, taking Aedion’s hand in her own.

Aelin’s eyes glinted, “Like you have to even ask, my love.” She teased, blowing a kiss to her dearest friend.

After having a few shots a piece, the girls and Aedion made their way to the dance floor with Aelin leading the way, fearless as always.

She lost herself to the music, letting it overwhelm and consume her thoughts and desires before she was nothing more but a whisper on the wind, her body no longer bound to the world around her.

When her sweat trickled down her forehead into her eyes, she wiped the moisture away, certain her mascara was running before opening them to take in her surroundings. She saw Aedion and Lysandra a foot away, lost in one another’s movements. Aelin smiled as she beheld the two closest people to her so deeply entwined with one another that there was no room for insecurities or doubts. It was just them.

She closed her eyes and made to spin around but halfway through her spin, she was caught by someone.

Her eyes flew open.

There he was.

As disarmingly attractive and intense as he had been this morning when she had left him, uncertain of when she may see him again.

“Aelin,” he murmured, pulling her vibrating body towards him so his voice caressed her ear.

A whisper of pleasure licked down her spine at the pure dominance he uttered her name with and she pressed her thighs together unabashedly.

Rowan caught the motion, eyes darkening as he took her in.

“Are you who I should be thanking for getting us in here?”

Rowan’s hands settled on Aelin’s hips as he moved seamlessly along with her to the music.

“Perhaps.” His face gave nothing else away.

“How did you swing that?”

“I have my ways.”

Aelin looped her arms around Rowan’s shoulders and pressed closer to him, the hard outlines of his body melding perfectly with her own curves. She felt alive in his arms. She felt like living flame as she writhed against him to the beat of the song.

“So mysterious tonight, Rowan. Why the secrets?”

Rowan’s pine-green eyes bore into her own turquoise and gold ones almost as though he could read straight through to her soul. She felt bare under his scrutiny. Normally, her inner walls were so solid that she never had to worry about anyone seeing the real her.

Not Rowan, though.

Her knees quaked slightly as a hand drifted from her waist to cup her chin. He ran a proprietary thumb across her lower lip.

“So many questions tonight.” He merely said.

Aelin’s eyes narrowed. “You’re not playing nice.”

“I never said I did. If you’re looking for nice, then you’ve come to the wrong place.”

Aelin’s mind whirled at the implications. “But last night…”

Rowan cocked his head, running his wandering hand down her neck and over her bare shoulder, setting Aelin shuddering under his warm touch.

“I already told you this morning, you were sick. I wouldn’t leave your safety to chance while under my roof.” He reminded her smoothly.

She knew, it was more of a test for his consistencies but she wanted to know more. Needed to. And the effects of the alcohol combined with the music and dancing had made her brave.

“What isn’t nice about you?” Her voice didn’t falter but it came from a more seductive place within her.

He pulled her closer, a distance she hadn’t realised she had let come between them while she was lost in the velvet smoothness of his words, the utter intensity of his presence.

“Do you want to go somewhere else?” Rowan asked.

“Somewhere more private?” She gave him a sultry little smile.

The sides of his lips quirked up just enough in answer to her question.

“One second,” she stepped away from Rowan towards her cousin and best friend, head dizzy as she left that bubble that had once again formed around them, blocking everything and everyone but them out.

She tapped Aedion’s shoulder and he looked up and away from Lysandra. Aelin pointed to Rowan who stood a few feet away, arms crossed and clearly waiting for her.

“I’m going to go talk to Rowan somewhere I can hear him. I’ll catch up with you later, okay?”

Aedion sized up the other man, not sure if he should trust him. Lysandra poked him in the chest.

“No pissing contests tonight, let her go. She’ll be safe.”

Aelin could barely hear over the music but she pecked Aedion on the cheek and hugged Lys before turning back to Rowan. He offered a hand to her and normally she would have swatted it away, citing something about not needing assistance, but she secretly craved the electricity that buzzed between them at his touch.

Rowan led her off the dance floor and up a hidden set of stairs she hadn’t spotted while she had been dancing. The hallway still pulsed with the music but it was more muted, more private and away from prying eyes. He took a key from his pocket when they reached a non-descript door halfway down the hallway. When the door was unlocked and opened, he held it open for her and she slipped by him into the office.

The room was decorated much like Rowan’s home, classy and clean with lovely art bedecking the walls. An oversized sofa took up one of the walls and a desk with a massive chair and computer lined the far wall. He closed the door behind him and allowed her to take in the surroundings.

“So, you do own this place.”

Rowan nodded, face unreadable.

“You’re awfully young to be a business owner.”

He prowled towards where she was standing in the middle of the room and her stomach squirmed as he neared.

“This is what you want to talk about?” Rowan’s voice dominated the small room.

Aelin’s pulse was erratic as he stopped behind her. There was an irrational part of her that thought her heart might stop the next time Rowan touched her but he didn’t. Not yet.

Rowan’s breath tickled the back of her neck and Aelin’s core clenched in an involuntary response. He wasn’t even touching her yet and she could hardly breathe with the need for more.

“What do you want, Aelin?”

His voice was low, guttural but more in control than Aelin herself felt.

She cleared her throat in an attempt to find her own voice.

“You have to tell me,” he murmured, more commanding than she’d yet to see from him, giving her a taste of what was to come before she decided how far she wanted to go.

She had her suspicions about what “not nice” might entail but the reckless and wild part of her craved more regardless. Aelin wanted to know just how not nice he could be.

Her breath faltered as she felt the heat of him close in on her and her desire to touch him again was almost painful. Aelin’s skin felt too tight and she swallowed audibly, refusing to be embarrassed as heat pooled at her centre. She could feel the wetness between her legs already, and there was no part of her that doubted where this encounter might end.

He settled his hands on her shoulders and pulled her close to him, her back snug to the warmth of his chest.

She felt every hardened inch of him pressed against her but his hold on her shoulders tightened as if knowing she was dying to turn to face him, to trace the clearly defined lines of his abdomen with her fingers and explore his body as thoroughly as she wanted him to explore her own.

Rowan ran his hands over her shoulders before leaning down to press a searing kiss on the tender spot between her neck and shoulder. She shivered and a whimper escaped her lips when he grazed his teeth over the same sensitive flesh.

“We cannot move forward if you don’t tell me, Aelin.”

Aelin, mustering whatever senses hadn’t abandoned her when Rowan had prowled towards her in that predatory manner of his, finally spoke.

“I want to know.”

Rowan’s teeth grazed her skin again and she shivered under his knowing tongue.

That tongue.

What it could do to her already and it wasn’t even near where she desperately craved.

“It’s not as easy as all that, Aelin.”

Gods, the way he said her name should have sent her running but all she wanted to do was jump him. Jump him and fist her hands in the short silver hair, tug him to her and taste him on her own lips.

“Then teach me,” she whispered, breath abandoning her along with her senses.

Rowan groaned low in his throat and she felt the impressive length of him against her backside. She ground into him, cheeks flushing as her blood heated. If she could see herself in a mirror, she knew what she would find.

Rowan spun her towards him, no longer gentle. He pulled her as close as was possible and then set his hands on her rear, pulling Aelin up so her legs wrapped around his waist. Rowan stepped towards the wall and pressed her into it, carrying her as if she was nothing more than feather-light.

Her back chilled as she leaned into the hard, cool wall and her breathing was so heavy she was almost ashamed at her lack of control.

Rowan pressed against her, taking all her air, consuming and dominating the almost non-existent space between them.

His eyes had darkened and his nostrils flared as Aelin’s heated core pressed against him, her hips gyrating selfishly for release from the hedonistic atmosphere.

Rowan took her chin in his hand again and leaned in, close enough that she felt his breath on her lips and then he murmured the one word that shattered the last of her senses.

“No.”

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My tumblr couldn't find your blog and I freaked out that you were gone gone! Stupid tumblr giving me a heart attack. While this blog is still here I still have hope and a connection. 😂 miss you. Xx Ok morbid thought but it's like visiting a grave or something lol (oh god if you ever post this I'm a weirdo). 😂😂😂 but at least you kinda get me right? Hahaha.

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I’M NOT DEAD, RENEE! HAHAHA. I fucking love you, you’re amazing.

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Haha 😘

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Happy New Years

This has been such a… consuming year. I’m drained. Emotionally, physically. Some good things happened. Some not so good. I’m alone and it’s 45 minutes to midnight. My husband is in another country having a worse time than I am but he for some reason won’t talk to me. I lost my best friend of 11 years because when I told her I was going to buy a house, she was only concerned how it would negatively impact her because we rented her other home from her. She hasn’t spoken to me since June. I lost my great grandmother which I didn’t think would hurt but she was the last close person to my dad so I feel like I lost my dad all over, which again I shouldn’t care about because of who he was but I’ll never get to figure myself out. I’ve realised I don’t have people in real life who actually care what happens to me, I’ve realised I’m alone even when I’m not.

But… I discovered tumblr. I discovered this fandom. I discovered many amazing people who do care from all around the world about what happens to me. I’ve discovered new books which is one of the only things that keeps me happy. I built a gaming computer which was super exciting but maybe also lame lol. I bought a house which even with the negativity from that selfish woman, is still wonderful. I’m getting a raise at work and was told I’m in a good position to become the next team lead when mine retires. My dog and cat both made it through the year with no illness which hasn’t happened for a while. I discovered fan fiction and rediscovered my love for writing, even if I’m not great at it.

I made a wonderful friend who if I go a day without talking to, I feel out of sorts because she just gets me. She keeps me going and keeps me grounded and she and her partner are coming to my country and they’ll stay at my place for Halloween. I hope she knows that I value her more than I should. I think she’s amazing and brilliant and talented and beautiful. She deserves the world. @paperbacktrash

So maybe some of these things are small compared to the bad stuff, but they’re the things that I hang on to so I don’t fall apart on those bad days.

To my Queens, @songbirdsbooks @throne-of-ashes-and-beauty @peppermintpekka I am so excited for the TOGNet to drop tomorrow. I’m excited to work with you guys and let’s be real, spread my love of ToG (and Rowaelin) to tumblr (even more than I already do).

To The Thirteen. Despite the weird ass drama, we have each other. Thank you for always being there and making me laugh even if I have nothing of worth to add to conversation (which is a lot of what I say tbh lol). I have never felt luckier to know such a wonderful group of strong and beautiful women. @paperbacktrash @foxboy-lucien @dreamilyzealousbird @aelin-and-feyre @queen-archeron @justasimplereader @fiery-feyre @songbirdsbooks @lyannablackbeak @highladyfxyre @runesandfaes @havilliardandgalathynius

Special thanks to the girls who make every day better when I get to talk to them - shenanigans included. @rowan-buzzard-whitethorn @paperbacktrash @throne-of-ashes-and-beauty @squaddreamcourt

To those of you I admire, am intimidated by and am not sure how to make decent enough conversation to get to know you better… I value you anyways and think you’re all beautiful people. @cassianandfenrysaremyboyos @catastrophicallyinlovewithbooks @cassiancalore @nessiansmut @tacmc @bookofmirth @rayonfrozenwings @aedicn

To @seashade Emma, I’m beyond excited for your book and I can’t wait to read more. I’m grateful for the opportunity and am excited you thought my input worthy enough!

To everyone else I’ve undoubtably forgotten because I’m on mobile and all these tags will blow up if I save this as a draft to check, thank you. Thank you for your messages, your asks and your support.

To those of you I didn’t get the chance to get to know, message me. I’m horrible at messaging and talking generally cus I’m an awkward bean but I’ll do my best.

Thank you for everything. It’s been half an hour since I started writing this and now I’m 10 minutes to the New Year and my heart feels lighter. I’m gonna go save my dog now from the fireworks.

- Love Kayla

xo

Haha kayla 😂😘💕 'tis all good. It's coz I have notes on for you so I don't miss your stuff! Lol.

But you did give me a mini heart attack with the way you put two sentences together- I need to remember to read to the end of the sentence not the end of the line because I thought..... that you lost your friend of 11 years - who was your husband and that he wasn't talking to you and I was like what!? No! That's not cool! Then read it properly and had to tell myself off for not finishing the sentence. 😂

And I was sad at the start and wanted to shout "but we all love you Kayla!" And then I realised that was ur pre-fandom thoughts and I'm just glad that ur happy! 💕💕💕

plus gaming pc's = awesome news - hamish just brought more ram today because that's the new reason his pic is slow.......... 🙄

I told him he might as well just get a new awesome pc and I'll have his one so I can play games (with my gazillion hours of free time - not).

Haha! Anyway happy New Years! I ramble. 💕🎉

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1k Giveaway!

Does anyone else just LOVE that that rhymes? K so, first and foremost: THANK YOU. For the support, the lols, the fics, the questions - literally EVERYTHING. You are all amazing people and thank you to the 1000 of you who decided to follow me. To celebrate, I’ll do a giveaway! 

There are a couple of rules and I totally stole them (no shame) from Becca.

  1. MUST be following me
  2. Must like AND/OR reblog this post.
  3. Must be at least 18 years of age OR have permission from parent/guardian to give me your mailing address.
  4. The winner will be randomly selected.
  5. The winner can choose one of the following options:
  • $15 (CAD) worth of books from book depository (please make sure the books ship to your country).
  • The ACOTAR colouring book
  • The Throne of Glass colouring book.

If you choose one of the colouring books, there may or may not be something extra slipped in there, who knows. Guess you’ll find out. ;)

The giveaway will officially end December 2nd. Hopefully we can time it so you get your winnings before Christmas!

Yey Kayla! 🎉🎉🎈👏👏😘

Also, if you don't follow this lovely lady you should because she's so nice.

And 🤷‍♀️ why not enter the giveaway. Lol

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Hello there Kayla I wanna know who you consider your “tumblr family” (since you’re one of my cool aunts)

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Leeeettttssss seeeeee hereeeeee. So I’m 25 which means by default, I’m older than probably most of the people I’m about to tag haha.

Nieces:

@foxboy-lucien (can’t mess with the family haha), @darlingfireheart @fiery-feyre @queen-archeron

The cousins that I admire but am not often in touch with: 

Aaaand I think that’s it off the top of my head? Thanks Marci!!

(look at that, got on a computer and can do a proper link)

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Aw Kayla!

Your making me feel stuff, like seriously my heart is like getting all big n it's like weird! Def fandom sisters!

💕💜😘

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shalizeh7

Rowan

@rowaelinsmut have you seen this? It’s amazing!

😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

I AM FUCKING DEAD. RIP MY HEART.

ALSO:

@aelin-and-feyre PLEASE TELL ME YOU ALSO SAW THIS BECAUSE I AM LEGIT FANNING MYSELF LIKE AN OLD SOUTHERN LADY DRINKING ICED TEA ON HER FRONT PORCH SAYING MY STARS AS THOUGH I WAS OFFENDED BUT AM REALLY JUST SECRETLY DROOLING BUT IM A LADY SO THATS ON LOCK.

Haha best reaction! It deserves a reblog. 😂👏👏👏

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Anonymous asked:

can you recommend some good acotar blogs please? :)

Aww thanks Kayla 💕💕💕 hope your move went well. 😊

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