🦁Rawrs🐯

It’s no secret Astarion hates himself. Like he deals with a lot of insecurities and self loathing. He just puts on an act of self confidence and narcissism to properly play the role of sexy vampire.

But I think a lot of people miss when he Ascends this gets so much worse. Not only does he still think he’s only good for sex and has nothing to offer beyond that. Now he’s a monster, not by force but by choice. He choose to become a monster. Now he’s expanded his act from sexy vampire to evil sexy vampire. He’s playing the villain because that’s what he thinks he is. And as we know he’s really not that great at acting.

I think it’s interesting everyone always talks about seeing through Astarion’s facade but when it comes to him ascending they’re so quick to fall for his act all over again.

There’s the line “if you stay with him he will always see you as degrading yourself” in his post ascension romance scene. A lot of people interpret it at face value as he hates and looks down on Tav. But I think it’s miss understood because he could never hate Tav as much as he hates himself. Infact I’d say he has Tav put up on the highest pedestal. He sees them as the kindest most caring person in the whole world. He adores them and holds them in the highest regard. That’s why them wanting to be with him so much they would even put themselves beneath him is the ultimate degradation. It’s also why he feels he has to turn them because he doesn’t believe there’s any reason they’d choose to stay with him of their own free will while at the same time he can’t bare to loose them. He can’t wrap his head around the idea that you could actually love a monster like him.

If you say you want freedom in the reunion party he panics. Why would you want freedom? To leave him? You want to leave him? Why? When he’s given you the only things he’s good for; luxury and sex. That’s the only reason you choose him in the first place. He’s desperate to make Tav happy. With out Tav he has nothing. He is nothing.

He hides his hurt and insecurities behind that mask of the villain, behind his facade of power and dominance. Under it all he’s still the frightened spawn cowering in the kennels. And there’s no one he’s more desperate to hide this from than Tav lest they realize their mistake of caring for him and leave.

Ok but that What We Do in the Shadow-Cursed Lands stream was so good!

I’m just gonna incorporate Vincent and Asatrion a default group mom when a more responsible adult isn’t available into my headcanon.

I think although he should have a beautiful singing voice in theory, Astarion is painfully tone deaf. He always manages to be sharp and off key. I also think he can make a good tone in his chest voice but can’t sing in falsetto to save his life. Way too pitchy and breathy. He can sing hushed lullabies best, a skill his partner will never know because he’ll only do it when he’s sure they’re 100% asleep.

I really love that Astarion will just straight up kill you. And he really just does not fucking care if he does.

A Bhaalist and Banite sandwich

My pre-tadpole durge having a casual night out with their favorite boys.

I always liked the idea of my durge knowing Cazador pre-tadpole. Like the Bhaal temple and his dungeon are right next to each other. Also I can only imagine there are hunting territory conflicts. It kinda came the scrapped concept that Cazador was going to be more connected to the plot as a Bane worshiper (maybe why him and Gort have the same terrible taste in shoes). It’s also interesting that they all have an involvement with the hells.

Since the three of them are all so involved in the city underworld. I like to headcanon that my durge met Cazador first by killing a spawn that was later replaced by Leon. He later introduced them to Gortash at one of his parties. Eventually they drop him in favor of Kethric.

Been seeing it circulate on Twitter that Cazador looks younger than Astarion and I’m sorry but no he fucking doesn’t 😭 Cazador looks significantly older than Astarion like he’s closer to Halsin’s age.

Do you play the dark urge because you like the extra lore or do you play the dark urge because you’re greatest fantasy is your loved ones seeing the absolute ugliest side of you and deciding to treat you with love and patience anyways.

I knew Astarion’s fuck ass bob from the new animated short reminded me of something…

I spent an embarrassing amount of time on this.

Ft. my main redemption dark urge (they/them). Between life and death after Bhaal drains them of their blood. They see their sister and love taunting them as the fear of dying sets in.

Old Habits Die Hard.

Ascended Astarion x Dark Urge Reader

Set after the events of the game. Lord Astarion falls into old habits and gives his pet Bhaalspawn some much needed enrichment.

Completely gender neutral reader, but they are a bottom.

Warnings: gore like really fucked up gore. Cheating. Smut. Dub-con/non-con. Not at all safe or sane for either parties. Dead Dove, Do Not Eat.

The rite of profane ascension had given him so much. The ability to see his own reflection, the ability to permanently walk in the sun, the power to take whatever he pleased, and the power to keep his beloved at his side for all eternity. However for all these gifts there were many things that remained. Much to Astarion’s disappointment ascension had not magically healed 200 years of torment, it had not fixed the feeling of disgust and loathing.

As much as he wanted to indulge, as mush as he had dreamed of a hedonistic life style awash with blood and sex; he could not over come the deep rooted disgust, the bile in the back of his throat. That night with his dear sweet consort and the two drow prostitutes had been deeply disappointing. Despite his desire to enjoy himself, he hadn’t. All he felt was disgust and anger, it took all of him to hide the hurt it caused him.

He could lie to you, but he could not lie to himself. Yours was the only touch he could tolerate. The only touch that didn’t cause his skin to crawl and his guts to twist. He could hardly stand the idea of any hands, other than the hands of his little love, touching him. He only longed for you and the familiar comfort of you body and blood. Not that he would ever tell you this, gods forbid you ever know the power you command over his newly beating heart. He needed to retain some semblance of dominance and control.

I wish you still got the option to offer your blood even after telling Astarion that you don’t care if he feeds on enemies :/

Bg3 fandom is waaaay to obsessed with what’s “canon” for an rpg game where the game events and characters change completely depending on what decisions you make as the player in a way that there are no “wrong”decisions and even if you make the same decisions each time you replay things will still change.

No because I don’t even romance Wyll and getting his low approval greeting every time is like dude why is my best friend mad at me. We’re not even past the goblin camp and I have 70 approval with you Wyll, you’re damn right I’ve got something to say.

Daddy issues are the only thing keeping me from romancing Shadowheart every single game. I always have the highest approval with her and she’s so so cute and pretty. However I am nothing if not a slut for a man’s approval and attention.

I love both versions of his story and it kinda rubs me the wrong way how Spawn Astarion purists will harass and judge people who enjoy Ascended Astarion while also picking and choosing traits they like from Ascended Astarion (and Wyll but that’s another discussion) to give to Spawn Astarion.

Batstarion? That’s a power only A!Astarion has. Spawn don’t have powers like that.

Dadstarion? A!Astarion actually mentions wanting children. S!Astarion doesn’t want to settle down.

Married Domestic Astarion? A!Astarion is actually happy to settle down in Baldur’s Gate. S!Astarion wants to travel and adventure, he even says settling down sounds boring.

You don’t want either Astarion, you want this guy:

Sorry for loving Ascended Astarion so much. Hearing David Bowie tell Sarah “Fear me. Love me. Obey me in all things, and I will be your slave.” when I was five changed me as a person.