WE WERE EXPLICITLY WARNED ABOUT BUYING THESE FRUITS

Either nobody gets my joke or they are not sufficiently cautious around goblin men

DON’T BE LIKE LAURA

but raven, it says no trick

HE IS HOLDING A KNIFE BEHIND THE GRAPES

LET 👏 RETAIL 👏 EMPLOYEES 👏 SIT 👏

The only major chain retail store that I know of that allows their cashiers to sit is the Aldi grocery store, a German chain. Their starting pay is also $12 an hour chain-wide.

The interior of the store looks like this so they save money on the annoying shelf restocking. Products remain in their boxes until being removed by customers.  No unboxing and putting stuff on shelves, and constantly having to rearrange it. Also, the boxes make inventory a breeze as a sealed box has a defined number of items in it. 

Typical American grocery stores have shelves like this

Every item has to be unboxed and neatly stacked on the shelves. If they get messed up by the customers, everything has to be rearranged back to specific rigid order. When you have to verify the inventory, every item has to be removed from the shelves to be counted and put back. Aldi’s also do not have plastic bags. You can buy reusable bags or simply use the empty cardboard boxes that are available.

Last is the carts. Most grocery stores have their carts strewn across the parking lots, rolling around and hitting cars until a store employee is sent out to collect them, after being yelled at by the manager when they were told to do other tasks in the meantime. Aldi’s chains those carts together and you have to put a Quarter in to release it. When you are done, you plug the chain back in and get your Quarter back. If others are lazy, you can collect and return the loose carts and collect the Quarters. 

It stops this…

Then the employees have to do this

reblogging this because I love Alidis

With the exception of the shelf stacking, all of this is totally normal in every single supermarket chain in the UK… what the heck America

Same for Germany… why would you make it any more complicated than that. Just. Why not let them sit??

They’re not normal for no reason. The right to sit during work seems normal for most retail workers in these countries because they are it is part of the labor rights that have been won by unions. Sometimes the right to sit was won in an agreement with the store and sometimes it was put down in national laws.

For example, in the UK your employer legally has to provide you with a comfortable seat if you do work that can be done while seating. In the Netherlands you have to be provided a seat if you work at a cash register for more than 4 hours a day or for more than 1 hour uninterrupted.

Unionize.

America’s Unions got killed.

Employees in Canada and America are regularly threatened by their employers if even a sniff of unionization is happening. No they cannot legally fire you for trying to unionize but they can cut your hours, emotionally manipulate you, turn your coworkers against you and drive you to quit. It’s awful. All to make the most money.

They DO have Aldi in the US, I love it, it’s much more affordable than anywhere else

Can you imagine that, Karen, a foreign supermarket chain in the US pays their workers more, allows them to sit when they work, AND is much much more affordable for the customers than anywhere else. It must be sorcery!

I have permanent nerve damage in my feet and back from working retail in the US. Sometimes I had to stand so long that my feet swelled up and I couldn’t walk.

I have a law degree.

Not only couldn’t I get a better job with a fucking law degree, I couldn’t even get a job that treated me like a human.

This country is garbage.

“Yoink” is the opposite of “Yeet”

But it’s just as fast

The Lord yeeteth and the Lord yoinketh away

@bax16 SO SAYETH THE LORD!

— Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf (via the-book-diaries)

Thank you, Saint Expedite

You’ve helped me today more than I can describe. Praise and glory to your name.

If you need help, go to Saint Expedite.

I didn’t have poundcake and said I’d get it to him today by hook or by crook. I asked him now to expedite me getting him poundcake, and holy crap, I got an immediate phone call cancelling all my responsibilities for the day. Off to the store I go, time to bake a poundcake.

I guess he really likes poundcake.

Praise again to your name, St. Expedite! You’re getting poundcake tonight!

Oh Lion of Egypt,

Bring your healing hands,

Save here your daughter.

Transform her bellicose ways into the fight to live.

Mollify her and heal her.

May these doctors be your priests as in days of old.

Dua, Mother of Cures!! Continue to bring your hands into this place.

*opens pill botttle*

*opens water bottle*

*pours some water out into my hand*

“Wait. No, that’s…no.”