until i reach the rainbow

it was a stroke of genius to give James T Kirk a bitchy flip phone in the 60's, truly amazing to watch him slam it shut like a pissed off socialite girl in 2000's teen shows

ATTENTION NEW TUMBLR USERS: This website is different from twitter and there are actually four (4) things that every blog needs. Go to the woods and fetch the cow as white as milk, the cape as red as blood, the hair as yellow as corn, the slipper as pure as gold

shoutout to whoever stole my amazon package containing nothing but a single pair of shoelaces.

#that giraffe is being so cute and curious and gentle#and that is running full speed because this is the worst fucking day if his LIFE#like IMAGINE having your butt gently scooted by the snoot of a pressence so massive#your body is not designed to even see high enough to see the top of#abd hes just gently nudging you along as you run for your life as fast as your legs can carry you#giraffe is playing humans are enjoying turtle is living out a cosmic horror story

Vs.

+ IMDb trivia | in/sp.

THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING 2001 | dir. Peter Jackson

Humans are awesome

Alien 1: “So you see, this is why we do not provoke the humans.”

Alien 2: “Yes, this is an insightful battle simulation training recording.”

Alien 1: “You misunderstand. The humans are not battle training. They are doing those things for entertainment only. For fun.”

Alien 2: “…What?… for entertain… Even the human young?!”

Alien 1: “Yes.”

Alien 2: “I… I understand now.”

This is awsome holy fuck

I mean, not just for fun, though. 

Like, the fun helps, sure, but the three strongest motivators of the human race are “it was there,” “hold my beer,” and “they all said I couldn’t… so I did”. 

And that’s probably pretty damn close to a perfect summary, here… 

It's Autumn, which means if I make a Big Pot of Soup it will Fix Everything. No one fact check me on this. We need to let the soup speak for itself.

I'm at a :.|:; for words.

Clue (1985) dir. Johnathan Lynn

[This idea has been rattling in my brain and I had to share it.]

I know we all love the ‘humans are space orcs’ concept… but imagine, onboard the new ship they’ve been assigned to, the human meets an actual space orc. A massive monster… fangs and tusks and scars and a battle-hardened stare, looming over all the other life forms on the ship in its thick indestructible armour it refuses to remove. It barely drinks, it doesn’t need sleep, its massive shoulders are heavy with the terrible things it has experienced. Compared to the squishy & delicate human body, this thing is a walking tank.

… Except instead of hating/ignoring one another, the human and the monster start bonding over both coming from death planets. The human is excited to find a life form who doesn’t quiver with fear at the vague description of a jellyfish and the monster is ecstatic to meet someone who understands the feeling of being bitten by a qua’lem (cats are pretty close). They sit together and compare dangerous animals and locations as the other aliens look on in confusion and fear… oh, you also have dense jungles of deadly hidden predators, boiling acid lakes, tamed predatory killers, and areas with horrendously high and low temperatures? Sick!! 

It doesn’t take long before the two of them become totally inseparable. The human loves not feeling like some kind of crazy outsider and the monster is overjoyed they’ve finally found an equal in this unkillable marshmallow.

Monster: When I was a youngling, a grol-lik stung straight through my armour. The pain lasted for approximately 16 human hours. Human: Oh yeah man, I get that. As a kid I got a wasp stuck in my shirt. It stung me like four times, it was awful, and all my cousins just laughed at me… Monster: [using their arm screen to research human courting methods] I see.

Not quite an ‘Orc’ per-se, but eh, close enough. See here giant spiky Deathworlder simping for tiny shouty Deathworlder.

This art is amazing and makes it so much better.

we love supportive friends

On Isolation