Hope for the 'Verse

It was late, most of Serenity's crew already asleep. River was curled up on the extra bed in the infirmary, her face turned towards her brother's, her breathing matching his.

Mal sat on a chair between the two med beds, idily keeping an eye on the door. He wasn't taking any chances, not after everything that had happened.

The rustling of fabric brought Mal out of his reverie and he glanced at Simon, smiling slightly when confused blue eyes met his.

"Hey, doc', how're you feelin'?"

Simon mumbled something, turning his head to look at River, smiling softly when he saw the blanket thrown over her.

"She passed out not long after you did. Today's been hard-"

"Wish you were my dad," Simon suddenly mumbled and Mal froze, his smile slipping.

"Shen me?"

"Would have been better," he went on, looking at the Captain through half-lidded eyes.

He tried to move his leg and hissed, sluggishly trying to throw the blanket off. Without thinking, Mal put a gentle yet restraining hand on his ankle, stopping him from moving. Rolling his head, Simon looked at the hand on his ankle and giggled, trying and failing to tap the Captain's chest. Frowning in concentration, he tapped Mal's arm instead, his eyes drooping.

"See. Better. You- you care."

Mal shook his head and folded his arms, looking at the doctor like he lost it. Maybe he did. Whatever Zoë drugged the doctor with was off limits whenever it was Mal's turn to keep vigil as far as he was concerned.

"I'm gonna let that slide, doc', 'cause you got shot and all-"

The doctor smiled, his eyes sliding closed.

"Mhm," he slurred, "Kaylee, she, she w's right. Ya ain't mean."

Before Mal could think of anything to say, Simon was out like a light, his head tilted to look at his sister.

"He's right," River whispered in a sing-song voice, glancing at the Captain with sleepy eyes, snuggling into the thick blanket, " 'for sons and daughters and fathers and everything and nothing, tis family in every sense if not in blood'."

Giving the Captain one last smile, she also drifted off, leaving the Captain with his thoughts and the ghosts hiding in the shadows.

Okay, so I was in a deep dark depression all day today, but the sis and I have been rewatching Firefly, and the episode "Safe" kind of fucked me up. The way Simon loves his sister so much more than their parents love either of them. His complete disregard for all the wealth and status he loses by searching for her. His life meaning so little to him without her that he's willing to die with her. And the contrast between that love and their parents' selfishness and indifference: how they refuse to listen to Simon or help, how status means more to them than the possibility that their daughter is in trouble.

And then the contrast between their father and Mal. Their father bailing Simon out of jail once and telling him, "I will not come for you again," because it will harm his reputation, and then this exchange after Mal rescues Simon and River from the witch burners:

Simon: Why did you come back for us?

Mal: You're on my crew.

Simon: Yes, but... You don't even like me. Why did you come back?

Mal: ... You're on my crew.

And Simon is so happy, because his own father abandoned him and River at the first sign of trouble, but Mal, who has so much more to lose than to gain by helping them, who barely knows them and doesn't even particularly like them, will come for them. Because his crew means more to him than their father's family ever meant to him.

Simon came for River, and Mal came for them both, and those are the people who really give a damn: the ones who will come for you in spite of everything.

I want to see characters being taken care of in an explicit and worshipful way. Home-cooked meals. Hair brushed and braided by gentle hands. Little gifts just because.

I want to read about characters who are not used to kindness being bombarded by acts of service. This trope works romantically and platonically. Give me found family and acts of service - all the ways a character is wrapped up in wordless, explicit care after years of cruelty and having no idea how to handle. I need it.

sir that’s my emotional support character who believes themselves unworthy and unable of love because of all that they’ve gone through but eventually realises they are worthy of love when they reach it through their found family

u know what makes me bitter? Firely was doing such a good job at setting up Mal's father-daughter/father-son relationship between himself and River and Simon, better than I've seen in most shows and movies, and we'll never get to see the payoff for that.

It was a slowburn.

They took time to sprinkle all these little significant moments throughout season one so we could see the slow progression of Mal going from "idgaf about you" to "you're crew/family".

I feel the most noticeable transition was with River. You can see him go from thinking of her as nothing but a liability, to "weird witchy girl i'm not 100% sure how to deal with" to "i actually care about this girl and don't want anything to happen to her", and you can see this especially in the season finale and Serenity.

Simon's case is a bit more frustrating, on the other hand... as it looks like Simon carries some daddy issues from his bio-dad abandoning him and River to their fate and caring more about Simon's reputation as a doctor than finding out what was going on with River. So he exhibits kind of a..rebellious attitude? towards Mal? A reluctance to trust his decision-making? Especially when it concerns River? And I feel like this is leftover trauma from his father abandoning them to their fate, so now Simon perceives Mal as another authority figure who will also abandon them withotu a second's thought if he doesn't remain hyper-vigilant, which often results in them butting heads.

I think the true emotional pay-off would've been when Malcolm had finally convinced Simon that he's not leaving him or River because they're family and he cares. That he doesn't need to keep thinking 10 steps ahead, because he's got an entire crew watching their backs and the weight of taking care of himself and River doesn't only fall on his shoulders anymore. I think of Mal noticing that even though River seems to be opening up to him and the crew after season 1, Simon is still neurotic and can't seem to relax. I think of River gently telling Simon it's ok, that they can trust Malcolm, that he should give him a chance. Simon saying she doesn't know what she's talking about, thnking her naive, perhaps even telling her in anger what their father did even though he regrets it when River's eyes well up with tears and she runs off. But in his mind, it was for the best because she NEEDS to know they're not safe, they'll never be safe. Cause if their own father was capable of abandoning him, who COULD they ever be safe with? They just have each other. And perhaps this playing into the reason he will not let Kayleigh in as well, cause she might like Simon and River but if it becomes a matter of the crew or the Tams, they're out (they're not of course). It all coming to a head with Malcolm learning of what their father did, and Malcolm swearing he will never do the same. Maybe he even confronts the bastard? Some mission taking them to where the Tams are from and running into him and the father expressing disappointment at how now they're running with criminals. MYABE THE DAD EVEN ALERTS THE ALLIANCE THEY'RE THERE, and Simon fears they'll be left behind by the crew because it's too risky, but they DON'T. Malcolm looks the dad straight in the eye and says "..You don't deserve them." and walks off calling after Simon, and he looks between the two men and this is when he realizes.. this is his family. And Malcolm Reynolds is more of a dad than his own will EVER be.

This could've taken anywhere from 2-3 seasons to happen, and it would've been so, SO satisfactory.

And I'm just upset we'll never get to see it :(

If you didn’t want to be assimilated into into my found family then you should have killed me when you had the chance

Also nothing will ever be funnier than the whole Leverage crew spending the first episode whining about how they work alone and this is a one-time thing ONLY and they DON’T work in a team EVER and then like two days later Nate tries to get rid of them and every single one of them is like “why are you trying to tear this family apart :(”

I’ll see you again. I promise.

firefly rewatch ☀ safe    

forget slow burn romance, give me slow burn found family. give me enemies to friends to siblings. tired, weary old mentors learning to live again for their plucky young apprentices. heroes sharing apartments after world saving adventures because they’re so used to living with each other. dramatic “oh shit” moments where one gets kidnapped and the other realizes “god, that’s my kid.” i want to sit and watch in agony for thirty chapters while two idiots slowly adopt each other, someone get on it

Star Wars + Found Family