i don’t understand the point of Head & Shoulders shampoo. no one has hair on their shoulders. who is shampooing shoulder hair. please come forward now. no questions

absolutely nothing, in my eyes, will ever surpass this in terms of sheer comedic value

me: life sucks everything is horrible

me: *remembers i get to see darth vader on a giant ass screen with surround sound while i eat pop corn and drink a damn icee and cry*

empire strikes back is so fake because luke is from space nevada & he was hanging out on hoth like no problem. he would have spent the whole time complaining about the cold!!!!! it would be so annoying han would have let him die

We should all be thankful that “anti-thunderstorms” with flashes of extreme darkness (during the day) followed by loud, high-pitch screeches, don’t exist.

what the actual fuck

@ 2017 bitch before u even think about fuckin us over just please…….. think abt what that hoe 2016 did to us,, you don’t have to stoop to their level, you can be great, you can be the bitch everyone loves, the bitch everyone appreciates, the bitch everyone thanks for being giving us a good year, you are capable of being That Bitch™

If you’re alienated by media portrayals of teenagers having the time of their lives, going on big adventures, making the best friends that’ll be their friends for life, going to parties every weekend and being generally very happy to be alive to the point that you feel worthless for doing absolutely nothing and you have to do your best just to stay alive, much less happy, and you worry that you’ll wonder why you wasted your youth and have nothing to show for it when you’re old and you feel like you’re running out of time to change that and probably never will but you’re still haunted by the regret you know you’ll feel in the future and your eventual mortality, clap your hands.

[obi-wan’s disappointed, accented voice] anakin,

ily: i love you

ilysm: i love you so much

dlmoisttlotjidnftdsaydihbpjfastmne: Don’t lecture me, Obi-Wan. I see through the lies of the Jedi. I do not fear the dark side as you do. I have brought peace, justice, freedom, and security to my new Empire.

je suis sick of this shit

furiohsa:

you fuckkng fool. youre assuming scooby is running at top speed instead of slowing down for his good friend and pal, shaggy. how did you not think of this. you fucking fool.

leave me alone but also shower me with attention

self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the Fucking void

my dashboard: read this post thats more than two  sentences long me: what is this. some kind of book club. Some kind of university PhD literature analysis study group

@sites that openly call me out for using adblock

did I ask