Márgu: *exists*

Me: She. She is my fictional daughter now.

Márgu icons because she is the most precious lil angel on the planet

Fun lil' crossover thingy I drew as my contribution for this year's Xmas lol (if it even counts as one)

Reindeer!Jesper design by KateFlynn btw!

Christmas Movies Ranked by How Anti-Capitalist They Are

It’s a Wonderful Life

Movies that make you want to pick a fight with the 1% and also weep with joy. Absolutely a classic and anti-capitalist at its very core. Will convince you we need to start oppressing landlords again.

“Just remember this, Mr. Potter, that this rabble you’re talking about… they do most of the working and paying and living and dying in this community. Well, is it too much to have them work and pay and live and die in a couple of decent rooms and a bath? Anyway, my father didn’t think so. People were human beings to him. But to you, a warped, frustrated old man, they’re cattle.”

SAY THAT!!! George Bailey said fuck landlords, all my homies hate landlords, they have NO rights. Local man believes poor people are human, dedicates his life to helping them, and in his time of the need literally the whole town comes together to support him and his family. Class solidarity ftw!

“Remember no man is a failure who has friends.” Bitch I CRY EVERY GODDAMN TIME. 

10/10

Home Alone

Soundtrack goes hard, the wacky hijinks even harder. 

Loses points because the bandits had a prime opportunity to seize and redistribute some of the wealth from this ritzy Chicago neighborhood and instead they focus their energy on trying to kill an 8-year-old who outsmarts them at every turn.

2/10

Elf

A family favorite in our house. Touches on the overworking and mistreatment of employees through Greenway Press – Walter forced to choose between being with his family on Christmas Eve or losing his job, it’s implied Deb has a pet grooming business on the side to makes ends meet despite being a receptionist at a NY publishing company, etc.

Honestly most of the points come from Jonie’s underrated yet highly relatable storyline. She works in retail, exhausted and cynical towards the high-paced Christmas season which gives her little to no relief or reward, since she’s surviving on ramen noodles and using the employee showers because her water was cut off. Not expanded on enough to be considered a true Marxist piece but the effort is appreciated.

5/10

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Although the meme is correct in that Rudolph’s red nose becomes desirable only once it proves to be useful, it does get points for exposing the harmful nature of forced conformity and those alienated by these capitalist ideals – Rudolph, Hermie, the island of misfit toys – are given a place to belong despite the perceived “flaws” that before made them undesirable.

Also the elves definitely have a free dental-plan now thanks to Hermie and are hopefully on their way to unionizing. Fucking superb you funky little misfit.

6/10

Klaus (2019)

Turns a member of the bourgeoisie into a man I’d trust to carry my mail. Respect for postal workers this movie contains was ahead of its time.

 No direct takedown of the establishment but a heartwarming message – “A true selfless act always sparks another” bITCH I may be crying – that emphasizes the importance of giving to others even when there is no selfish motivation to do so, which is inherently anti-capitalist.  

8/10

The Santa Clause

Scott Calvin starts as a toy executive who takes part in the commercialization of Christmas. He was probably a business major so automatically loses points.

The Santa dynasty itself seems to operate under the cutthroat rules of the business world where you must overthrow (or in this case, throw him off the roof) the former CEO in order to seize power. 

Elves have not unionized or seized the means of production by the end.

0/10

A Christmas Carol 

THE ORIGINAL. Charles Dickens was not even in the neighborhood of fucking around with this one. CREATED the anti-capitalist Christmas genre!!

Rich man treats his employees like shit and gets terrorized by three ghosts on Christmas Eve. Force him to redistribute his wealth by dragging him through a montage of his most epic fails – oh, hey, remember when your fiancé left you? – and make him listen as all his employees and relatives complain about his stingy ass. 

They end this slideshow by throwing this dude into his own grave. DIRECT ACTION. 

Like damn, the ghosts really said, “If you hoard your resources and ignore those in need when you could directly improve/save lives with no cost to yourself, you will die ALONE and you WILL pay for your crimes in hell.” Literally watching this movie is a catharsis for anyone who is or has been poor and working class. 

I’m including all versions of this movie but a special shout out to the Muppet version because it fucks the hardest. 

100/10

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

Listen I’m not even in realms of joking with this one. This movie is THE anti-capitalist film of the holiday season. 

WhoVille commercializing Christmas and a fixation on consumer culture to the point where anything and anyONE who cannot be commodified – aka the GRINCH – is alienated? The Whos rediscovering that people should be cherished over material items once it all is stolen and they must confront how empty the holiday has become??

Cindy Lou becoming disillusioned in Christmas – at an age that coincides when many children (those who celebrate Christmas at least) lost belief in Santa and had to wrestle with what the holiday means with the magic gone and they’re more aware of the rampant consumerism that taints the season?? Her resolve to find a meaning that goes beyond material consumption because if a holiday founded on goodwill doesn’t extend that goodwill to everyone, even those society deems undesirable, then what’s the point???

The Grinch despising Christmas because he is unable to participate and isolated from the Whos and also the better qualities within himself? His alienation serving to demonize him further as it allows the public to narrow his valid criticisms of the holiday down to him being different and thus inherently predisposed to evil?? And hmm isn’t it interesting that a LOT of this demonization comes via Mayor Augustus “generously paid for by the tax-payers of Whoville” Maywho, Mr. 1% himself.

The upper vs working class divide evident in the light show competition between Martha May and Betty Lou Who?? The opening scene of the shopping frenzy that mirrors our own consumerist culture and overworking of retail/poster workers??? This entire monologue:

“That’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? That’s what it’s always been about. Gifts, gifts… gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts! You wanna know what happens to your gifts? They all come to me. In your garbage. You see what I’m saying? In your garbage. I could hang myself with all the bad Christmas neckties I found at the dump. And the avarice… the avarice never ends! ‘I want golf clubs. I want diamonds. I want a pony so I can ride it twice, get bored and sell it to make glue.’" 

MARXIST KING. MENTION IT ALL.

1000/10

Top 25 Christmas Films (5-1)

5. Klaus (2019)

The only film of my top 5 that came out past the 60’s, Klaus came out in 2019 and was instantly a Christmas classic. Essentially a “Santa Claus origin story”, Klaus is a heartwarming and humorous tale about the healing power of doing good. But it’s not just the story; every part of Klaus is perfectly put together. The voice acting is phenomenal across the board. The score swells with the emotional moments and compliments the humour well. And the animation, the animation is on another level. It’s traditional 2D animation, but through volumetric lightning and unique textures it has a 3D effect, despite being entirely 2D. It’s a work of art that shows the effort put in by the whole crew to create something with interesting shots, beautiful images, and spectacular performances. You are doing yourself a disservice if you don’t sit down and enjoy this new Christmas classic.

4. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (1964)

You know the song. Everyone knows the song. And you probably know the movie too, since it’s played year after year. And for good reason. Rather than just being a simple retelling, the animation expands the story to include catchy songs, fun side-characters, and a solid plot about who Rudolph was and how he came to save Christmas. In re-watching, I’ve realized one of the reasons why this film is engrossing is because the story is Joseph Campbell’s “The Hero’s Journey”. Rudolph faces challenges, heads out into The Unknown, and returns after growing; it’s a classic story formula that we come back to because it works. Animation-wise, the stop-motion puppet work has an ageless quality to it, always endearing to watch. It’s a timeless animation that will endure, snowy winter after snowy winter.

3. A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965)

Much like Rudolph before, there’s an ageless quality to A Charlie Brown Christmas. Of all the M. Schulz Peanuts animations, this is the one that lives in my head. The iconic opening, the dance scene, Snoopy’s humour side gags, the songs, and the warm, cheery feeling when watching is hard to beat. Apparently its jazz soundtrack, child voice actors, and lack of a laugh track were unconventional choices in the 60’s, but I can’t imagine this any other way. It’s timeless in the simple designs, slow but comfortable story, and exploration of the feeling of Christmas. It may be slow, but it knows to take its time, making something comfortable and warm to return to. There’s nothing negative I have to say about this animated special.

2. Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas (1966)

It was a bit of a toss up for me between Charlie Brown and this one. Between the two, this one is the one I prefer for Christmas Eve. Boris Karloff’s voice is perfect for both the narration and The Grinch, and the rest of the cast fit the whimsical Whos. Credit must also go to Thurl Ravenscroft as the bass vocalist for the iconic "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch". This half-hour animation is lively, hilarious, and all these years later, still a blast to watch. And that’s no surprise, since it was directed by Chuck Jones, aka, the man responsible for some of the best Looney Tunes animations. The story is simple but engaging, and Dr. Seuss’ eye-catching, wild designs help to keep everything fun to watch. The Grinch is as much a staple of Christmas as reindeer, presents, or stockings by the fire.

1. Miracle on 34th Street (1947)

Perhaps the classic Christmas movie to end all classics, 1947’s Miracle on 34th Street is sentimental, smart, silly, and a delight to watch. All of the cast is fantastic, with special shout-outs to Natalie Wood’s natural, sweet performance and Edmund Gwenn's spectacular turn as Kris Kringle, which won him an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor. He’s jolly, kind, a bit mischievous, and a joy to watch. He really makes you believe, or want to believe, that he is Santa Claus. The script is solid, never feeling flabby and always keeping your attention. It’s got comedy and heart in equal measure, and its sentimental message is not overdone, perhaps best showcased in the courtroom scene. That scene has stayed with me since viewing it. It’s not just a classic because of its age, but because it is smartly written, timelessly funny, and fully heartwarming. It’s a special type of Christmas magic.

Klaus

The image is from a Google search btw. And there's no spoilers here.

Hey! Ever watched Klaus? You should, it's on Netflix. You won't regret it.

It's the best Christmas movie I've ever seen and I've seen some of the really good old Christmas movies.

I love this movie so much and it just makes me so so happy and always makes me cry at the end.

It gives such a warm, happy, satisfied feeling, like the feeling when you have your absolute favorite food and it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy and happy and feeling satisfied after. That's what this movie is. It doesn't leave you wanting more, the story is complete by the end and it's such a good ending.

And it's not like anything I've seen, most Christmas movies made now have the same basic plots and are kinda the same but this one is just so different, yeah it's magic and the Santa origin but it does it so well and it's so wonderful.

'Invisible' by Zara Larsson is an amazing song and fits the movie so well.

I love this movie, it's the best and I will watch it every year for Christmas season, multiple times with joy!

It's so wonderful and will make you feel so good.

1000/10

Watch it is you want to and please experience the joy of Klaus.

Age headcanons for these two

Alright, starting with Klaus

I headcanon him as 46.

He might look too old for being forty, especially when accounting for the all white hair, but he does have colored eyebrows which leads me to believe he's more youthful than he appears.

The whole head of white hair by 40 is entirely possible, as my dad has always had white hair ever since I was born, really.

Also, white hair can be caused by stress. And which bitch had to watch his wife slowly die?

This bitch.

One thing that also ages him are his eye and mouth wrinkle-things. But one of the first few pictures of "46 year old man" on google is this.

He's got them too.

Also the fact that Klaus is going around chopping wood all day and all sorts of physical labour, which is much easier to do with a younger body.

Jesper

Jesper is a 33 year old man.

His dad has tries multiple forms of education with him prior to Smeerensburg, and education takes a long ass time. So that adds to the age thing.

The fact that he's spoiled at the beginning of the movie doesn't equate to age because I have met plenty of bitchy, spoiled men older than 33.

Jesper's face also has wrinkles under his eyes and around his mouth.

The mouth-lines do only appear when he is like, really expressive with his lips, though.

Also, to back this up, Jesper looks like he is in his early to mid forties after the 12 year jump at the end of the movie with his graying hair.

Unlike Klaus, he probably doesn't gray easily or fast. My mom barely started graying a few years before she became 50. So the hair thing is perfectly understandable.

If he still looks too young to you, well, he's lived a pampered life, and lack of stress helps people not age super goddamn quickly. He also doesn't strike me as much of an outdoor's person, and staying inside a lot can help one collect a more youthful appearance.

Klaus (2019)

The “animated masterpieces that lost their deserved Oscar to the Toy Story franchise” club

yeah I’m still salty.

Sorry I had to...

Animation from last year was good

2019 was such a great year for 2D animation ~

This decade was truly the decade of animation. We got so many amazing shows that literally shaped a generation and I can't wait to see what the next decade will bring.