Let's Rank the Animaniacs segments!
The order won't surprise you too much if you've followed me for a while or have seen a few of my Animaniacs-related posts (although my opinions on some segments have changed), but I figured it would be fun to rank them anyway (plus it relates to something I wanted to say regarding the characters, but I'll save that for the end). Sub series like Wheel of Morality and Dot's Poetry Corner don't count.
Segments I actively dislike
Worst - Katie Ka-Boom
"lol teenage girls amiright?" No. Shut up. This isn't funny. Her catchphrase is dumb (“I’m not overreacting, I’m a teenager!”) and honestly her parents suck too (“Teenagers should be locked away until they’re 30.”) This is easily the most mean-spirited segment on the show, it reeks of bitterness.
The Hip Hippos
The fat jokes suck and both hippos are boring characters with no real goal or motivation; but they are a genuinely wholesome couple and the idea of out of touch high class people being the stars of a segment is at the very least a good idea, they just botched the execution.
Chicken Boo
The Chicken Boo segments are an okay joke told too many times in the exact same way.
Buttons and Mindy
This segment is too mean spirited and is basically the same segment every time but I'm ranking them higher than Boo because Buttons and Mindy, as characters, are adorable and actually have personalities, unlike Boo (I'm aware Boo being like that is the point, but still).
Segments that are...OK
Mime Time
I think The Mime being such a bland character actually improves these bumpers. I don't feel too bad when he gets hurt because we barely know him and his bumpers are brief, so we don't see him suffer for too long. Although I do think the slapstick is kinda just...fine.
The Flame
These are little boring. I feel like the Warners do a better job with educational segments. These segments pretty much just exist to teach US history, but in a more tame yet in your face about how great they want kids to think America is way than when Warner segments would.
Randy Beaman Kid/Colin
It sure is...a bumper.
The Incredible Gnome in People's Mouths
This might be the weirdest premise of any Animaniacs segment, and that's saying a lot. It's alright.
Good Idea Bad Idea
Easily the best non-sub series bumper for sure...but it's still just a bumper.
Starbox and Cindy
This segment is kind of like Buttons and Mindy but since the protagonist is a bad person, his pain can actually be funny. It's also kind of like Pinky, Elmyra and the Brain if they didn't turn an iconic double act into an unremarkable trio. Hearing Cindy ramble about random stuff in the background is both cute and funny (I'll admit the Gnome probably should be higher because it's more of an original idea...but Cindy's adorable so I'm putting this higher lol).
Goodfeathers
I didn't like their first segment, but a lot of their later ones are OK, even though many over-rely on the whole "and then the Goodfeathers get hurt" bit. They're not much more than a (now dated) reference, and I think the writers realised this eventually because they clearly gave up on them at one point. They get no segments in season 3, only one in season 4, in season 5 they just get cameos and bumpers, and they show up really late compared to everyone else in Wakko's Wish. Pesto's the only standout character here to me, I don't really care for Squit or Bobby.
Minerva Mink
I like how she loves to wallow in self pity about how hard her life is yet is incredibly vain, manipulative and loves to be ruder than she needs to be. She's not a saint, but that's funny! I would've put her segments in the next tier if not for 1-the fact that she only has two segments so she never got to reach her full potential as a character and 2-the sheer amount of perv-pandering...which happens to be the reason why she only has two segments.
Segments I like!
Rita and Runt
Their segments can be hit or miss, but I think the bad ones aren't bad enough and the good ones are good enough to warrant them being this high. Rita and Runt are both likeable characters, their segments aren't the funniest but they have a lot of heart. Not gonna lie Rita's probably the best singer on the show.
Slappy Squirrel
She's basically what would happen if a Looney Tunes character ever actually grew to be old. She solves modern day problems with old school cartoon solutions, she's great!
Pinky and the Brain
In truth, if it weren't for their spin off series and the Animaniacs reboot these guys would probably be under Slappy. I've dedicated at least four long posts to these two I'm not going into further detail lol.
Best - Yakko, Wakko, and Dot
Chaotic good puppy children live out every kid's fantasy of fighting back against adults who mistreat them or others, what's not to like? I like that out of all the characters (aside from Slappy) they're the best homage to classic cartoons, between their designs and the fact that they often have entire segments that are homages to classic cartoons, like "The Girl with the Googily Goop", "The Warner's Vault" or "Yakko Amakko". Plus the Warners have one of the least formulaic segments on the show so that helps-great songs, cute sibling/family shenanigans, fun parodies, and just a whole bunch of zany chaos!
In all seriousness, the main reason I made this post is because a couple times I've seen people post/tweet something along the lines of "real Animaniacs fans like all/most segments" or "a true Animaniacs fan should like *blah blah blah* segments" and I just wanted to say...no.
If you only watch the show for the Warners, or just Slappy, or both Pinky and the Brain and Starbox and Cindy, or just Rita and Runt, Hip Hippos and Mime Time, or even literally only for Katie Kaboom, that's valid.
There's no quota for which segments you have to like. If you're a fan, you're a fan, no one else gets to decide that.
