Suffering a bit too much from numbers 1 & 7 atm 😒😬

First...I am NOT an artist.

I don’t draw well, but I can paint relatively well, and I throw the HELL out of some pottery.

But I’m also a writer...and I constantly crave validation for my work. It’s what keeps me going. It’s what pushes me to write more. Validation in the form of comments and kudos on one of my fics makes me want to write everything.

Today, some friends and I were chatting about our fics, and how validating comments compels is to write more, and one of them said, “I need them to put Compliment Couins in the Validation Machine...Then I can give them more!”

And I couldn’t get the image out of my head. So I spent 2 hours creating this goofy little piece of art. Because it’s true.

If you’re reading a fic someone has written, leave them a comment, even if it’s just one word, or you just say, “I enjoyed this.”

It’s so important to us. Especially since we spend great quantities of time writing our hearts out.

Drop a Compliment Coin in our Validation Machine and select a phrase! We’ll love it. I promise!

“Getting” yourself to write

Yesterday, I was trawling iTunes for a decent podcast about writing. After a while, I gave up, because 90% of them talked incessantly about “self-discipline,” “making writing a habit,” “getting your butt in the chair,” “getting yourself to write.” To me, that’s six flavors of fucked up.

Okay, yes—I see why we might want to “make writing a habit.” If we want to finish anything, we’ll have to write at least semi-regularly. In practical terms, I get it.

But maybe before we force our butts into chairs, we should ask why it’s so hard to “get” ourselves to write. We aren’t deranged; our brains say “I don’t want to do this” for a reason. We should take that reason seriously.

Most of us resist writing because it hurts and it’s hard. Well, you say, writing isn’t supposed to be easy—but there’s hard, and then there’s hard. For many of us, sitting down to write feels like being asked to solve a problem that is both urgent and unsolvable—“I have to, but it’s impossible, but I have to, but it’s impossible.” It feels fucking awful, so naturally we avoid it.

We can’t “make writing a habit,” then, until we make it less painful. Something we don’t just “get” ourselves to do.

The “make writing a habit” people are trying to do that, in their way. If you do something regularly, the theory goes, you stop dreading it with such special intensity because it just becomes a thing you do. But my god, if you’re still in that “dreading it” phase and someone tells you to “make writing a habit,” that sounds horrible.

So many of us already dismiss our own pain constantly. If we turn writing into another occasion for mute suffering, for numb and joyless endurance, we 1) will not write more, and 2) should not write more, because we should not intentionally hurt ourselves.

Seriously. If you want to write more, don’t ask, “how can I make myself write?” Ask, “why is writing so painful for me and how can I ease that pain?” Show some compassion for yourself. Forgive yourself for not being the person you wish you were and treat the person you are with some basic decency. Give yourself a fucking break for avoiding a thing that makes you feel awful.

Daniel José Older, in my favorite article on writing ever, has this to say to the people who admonish writers to write every day:

The antidote, he says, is to treat yourself kindly:

Writing has the potential to bring us so much joy. Why else would we want to do it? But first we’ve got to unlearn the pain and dread and anxiety and shame attached to writing—not just so we can write more, but for our own sakes! Forget “making writing a habit”—how about “being less miserable”? That’s a worthy goal too!

Luckily, there are ways to do this. But before I get into them, please absorb this lesson: if you want to write, start by valuing your own well-being. Start by forgiving yourself. And listen to yourself when something hurts.

Next post: freewriting

Ask me a question or send me feedback! Podcast recommendations welcome…

I need to read this again and again and again

Honestly, “Forgive yourself for not being the person you wish you were and treat the person you are with some basic decency,” is one of the most powerful things I’ve ever read.

This also makes me think of The Pervocracy’s “little rat” post (it seems like the original blog is now gone, but there’s a reblog here) - the gist of which is basically that when we react to finally doing something we’ve been meaning to get done by beating up on ourselves for not doing it earlier (we sit down to write and feel swamped by shame because it’s been a long time, for example), we’re inadvertently teaching our brains to associate doing a positive thing with pain.  And so our brains will shove us away from that thing even harder because we’ve learned that it hurts.  We can disrupt that cycle by stepping back, noticing how we’re talking to ourselves, and being compassionate to ourselves instead.

My god, thank you whoever wrote this stuff. I’m so hard on my myself and I don’t know how to S T O P, but maybe this will help me start treating myself better.

This might be a little perverse, but the turning point for me was when I realized that beating myself up was ineffective. I hoped it would make me work harder, but it just didn’t, so the most rational thing to do was to look for another approach. It wasn’t just a self-care “I don’t deserve to suffer” thing (although it was that too), it was an efficiency analysis thing. Tearing yourself down DOESN’T WORK. It’s the very definition of “doing the same thing and expecting different results.”

#writing is always so hard for me because my head constantly feels murky#like the words are there#but theyre blurry and dont form sentences#it always feels so exhausting to reach for them#and by the time i get through one sentence#my brain has already forgotten the next one#i will try to be less hard on myself#and see if putting the nonsense jumble of words#on the page will help

I have this issue too, and yes, that’s a good idea. My first drafts are at least 50% three-word phrases taped together with dashes. For whatever reason, forming complex syntax takes all the effort and attention I need to, you know, tell the story, so I have to form the sentences later. That’s the only way the word-generating part of my brain can keep up with the narrative-generating part.

Me, throwing em dashes, semicolons, commas, and ellipses into a jumbo-sized trash bag and then shaking it vigorously: hang on I gotta season my fic before I upload it

I quite often get comments on my fanfic that say “I don’t want to quote your whole fic back at you” but you know that? Please do! Because when you quote the parts that you like and add your own comments - whether that’s an in-depth analysis or a series of emojis - just for a second I get the experience of seeing my own writing through someone else’s eyes. I get the tiniest vicarious moment of being the reader rather than the writer. And I love it.

Fic Writer Tag! Writer Fic Tag! Tag Fic Writer!

Rules: none. Tag: anyone

1. Fave fic I have written: Broken or maybe (vir)Us.

2. A Struggle™️ Disco 2000. Still not happy.

3. One shots. Am better at them.

4. Mostly pantsing.

5. I’m often surprised that stuff I thought was good doesn’t get much love, or stuff I posted reluctantly cos I thought it was kind of rubbish is loved.

@hobbeshalftail3469 @robinlestrange @zoesongs @highfunctioningflailgirl @vgriffindor @bluerobinwrites @chillyhollow @pools-of-venetianblue

Ooh fun! Thank you for the tag :)

I’ll go ahead and no-pressure tag @lemon-verbena-writes​ and @lovebeyondmeasure​

why you should keep writing your story

how write book?

like that but more

oh noooooo

There’s 3 parts to this if you’re in need of a little inspo…or a good laugh! @hobbeshalftail3469 @lulacat3 @bluerobinwrites 

I’ll take both inspo and a good giggle, snicker, guffaw or laugh!

I’m also tagging in @pools-of-venetianblue and @vgriffindor @chillyhollow and @diefrau98 and @lemon-verbena-writes

yes i made this because I didn’t want to work on a WIP 

This is an ultimate masterlist of many resources that could be helpful for writers. I apologize in advance for any not working links. Check out the ultimate writing resource masterlist here (x) and my “novel” tag here (x).

✑ PLANNING

Outlining & Organizing

✑ INSPIRATION

✑ PLOT

In General

Beginning

Foreshadowing

Setting

Ending

✑ CHARACTER

Names

Different Types of Characters

Males

Character Development

✑ STYLE

Chapters

Dialogue 

Show, Don’t Tell (Description)

Character Description

Flashbacks

P.O.V

LANGUAGE

✑ USEFUL WEBSITES/LINKS

Last but not least, the most helpful tool for any writer out there is Google!

So so helpful

Dunno if I’ve reblogged this.

Me: *stops writing* well that’s enough writing for now

Me: *later* Alright time to write!

Me: *staring at where I left off*

take your time, they said.

the words will come to you, they said.