part-time soulmate, full-time problem

sorry im too sexy to care about the plot, i just wanna see them doing stupid shit after being in a car together for 5 hours

The thing is, Sam is a freak, Dean has every diagnosable issue ever, and Cas is a war criminal. Hopes this helps someone.

"We'll have to find someone else." ↳ 5.17 - 99 PROBLEMS

9.09 Holy Terror

in my mind dean was always supposed to get older and become the new bobby. like ok you're a hunter, maybe a little new to the scene and still figuring things out. and you're tracking down a werewolf, easy case. except some things don't line up quite right and now you're thinking it might not actually be a werewolf. so you ask around a hunter's bar and they all say the same thing. go to this one bunker in the middle of nowhere in kansas

and you're like sure what the hell. you're stumped anyway, might as well check it out. maybe it's a weapons storehouse or something. but then you get there and there's a doorbell and a bee-shaped welcome mat out front and you're starting to think you've got the wrong place. the door swings open and there's this middle aged guy with a robe and batman pyjama bottoms. and he laughs at the look on your face and tells you to come in, he doesn't bite. not since he got that vampire cure, anyway. you're not sure what to make of that last part but he winks at you when he says it so you figure he's joking. maybe.

he gives great advice about hunting everything under the sun and if you stick around long enough he'll go on and on about how he saved the world at least five times. ok sure. you don't want to be rude so you just sit there and sip your coffee politely while he talks about some guy called chuck and how much of a bitch he is. and another guy who's aged a little more gracefully comes padding down the hallway in a metallica t-shirt and rolls his eyes. has he told you about tvland yet? ('i was just getting to that part!')

if you go to the basement you'll find shotguns filled with salt, wooden stakes, holy water, and demon-killing bullets for sale. and if you're lucky the witch who sells hex bags might be around. low-grade curses only, of course. you better leave the powerful stuff to the professionals. and she'll get in trouble if she gives you anything stronger, not that she can't be persuaded. a girl's gotta make a living after all and she's always encouraged eager new witches. it's worked out pretty well for her so far. and then a guy you swear is twice your height will raise an eyebrow at her and insist she only sell the weaker hex bags, please. you don't need any more witches in your coven, rowena. you've got plenty

pagan god giving you trouble? there's a man who swings by every once in a while who knows how to deal with those. give him some candy or a fun magic relic and he might help you out. it depends. he's a little picky about dishing out advice and he likes to play favorites. and if you've got a demon problem they can give you the number of a guy who swears up and down that he used to be the king of hell. but you've seen him walking around with a purse-sized terrier tucked under his arm and a dozen more following him so you're not really sure if you believe him

idk i like to think that dean got to grow old and retire. that doesn't mean he stops helping people, it just means he hangs up his coat and becomes an old man who rambles on and on about 'back in my day' and makes a dent in his leather armchair. there's a foosball table where the dungeon used to be and sam complains about beer bottles being everywhere and it becomes a safe haven for anyone still fighting the good fight. it's just that for dean and the rest of team free will the fight is over. they're done hunting now

I take requests!

#genuinely don’t know whose reaction is funniest#Sam like 🤯#Dean basically just turning into a loading screen as he tries to process this#or Cas just dropping his head and praying for death bc going back to the Empty would actually be preferable to witnessing Gabe’s hookups (via @ilarual)

@castiel screeeam

like I GET deancrit and I get that perspective but I can never truly get behind it at the end of the day, because if you just shifted supernatural a couple degrees to the left and gave tfw some stable external relationships outside each other this problem would be solved. the show demonstrates to the audience over and over again that actually when dean has stability, when he has people who will check his behaviour and tell him he’s being a dick when he’s being a dick, so much of the weird entrenched misery and nastiness in the tfw dynamic goes away. dean is not some arch-abusive villain who is destined to always be horrible. his maladaptive behaviours are, on the whole, relatively easy problems to solve that he ALSO wants to solve.

but then spn is like yeah but what if bobby died what if mary died what if they could never have a moment of peace what if every scrap of happiness dean manages to claw his way is taken from him what if these guys are single-handedly responsible for solving every dumbass supernatural problem that exists. “see these characters at their WORST” well okay I’ve seen that for ten seasons I don’t want that. that’s boring. I reject that

also they should have put dean and cas in a literal closet. dean is hiding in a closet during a case, hiding from a ghost or something, and cas teleports right next to him. dean can barely hold back a very high pitched scream.

they have the personal space talk right after this

“Dude,” Dean hisses.

“Why are we in a closet?” Cas asks, brow furrowed, as near as he can tell in the dim light coming through the closet doors.

“I am in a closet because I’m hiding from a vampire,” he snaps in a whisper. “I dunno why the fuck you’re here.”

“I’m here because you’re here.” Cas looks around. “This man owns far too many ties.”

“He’s in business. It’s a prerequisite.” Dean is, for a second, grateful that it’s Cas who’s in here and not Sam, because Sam would have busted his balls for busting out a four dollar word like prerequisite. “Cas-“

“Where’s Sam?”

“I don’t know. Somewhere in the house. Cas-“

“Dean.” Cas takes a few steps forwards. “It is imperative-“

“Cas,” Dean says. “I’m on a hunt.”

“The fate of all mankind is far more pressing, don’t you think?”

“Easy for you to say, I’m the one with his ass on the line with Edward Cullen out there.”

Cas squints. “I don’t understand that reference.”

Dean huffs and glowers at Cas. Cas takes another couple steps, so close that Dean could count each individual eyelash, if he was so inclined.

Not that he is so inclined.

“Do angels have any concept of personal space?” He asks, trying to distract himself from the funny way the dim light strikes Cas’ very blue eyes.

“Not particularly.”

“You should learn.”

Cas squints again, nose scrunching a little. “Is your plan to survive the apocalypse in this closet?”

Dean scowls. “Alright, you know what, you can kiss my-“

The doors fly open and the vampire lunges. Dean lets out what he’d deny was a yelp, scrambling for a weapon.

Cas reaches out, grabs the top of the vampire’s hair, and yanks his head off his body.

Dean stares, first at the corpse on the ground and then at the head dangling from Cas’ fingers.

“Dude,” he says again, a little awed in spite of himself.

“We have business to discuss,” Cas says. “Find Sam.”

Speak of the Devil (poor choice of words, maybe), Sam comes skittering in. He gapes at the body of the vampire and then at the head.

“Oh. Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Sam.” Cas drops the head. “We should go. I have things to discuss with you.”

Cas sweeps out of the bedroom. Sam looks at Dean.

“Did Cas rip the head off that guy?” He whispers.

“Yes. Yes he did.”

“Huh.” Sam shakes his head. “Fucked up.”

“I dunno,” Dean mumbles as they go to follow Cas out of the house. “Pretty cool, I thought.”

I can’t stop thinking about if they’d been allowed to be canon… they’d be exactly the same grumpy, old obnoxious bastards as always but with more sexual bribery. *shrug* We we robbed of so much hilarity and I’m still sour about it. 

(And no Sam’s not a voyeur, it’s just TFW is still cheap enough to share motel rooms on cases, imho) 

—>Don’t repost

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7.23  Survival of the Fittest

Once they got over being wary of each other I think Emma, Claire, and Jack would have SOOO much fun giving TFW endless shit. Like Sam, Dean, and Cas get absolutely ROASTED over family dinners.

Sam tries to make Emma finish her greens before dessert and she's like "sorry I only eat my greens for uncles who haven't shot me."

And Claire and Jack stare bug eyes at them for a second before Claire shrugs and starts stealing Dean's fries while looking him in the eyes the entire time, just daring him to say a single goddamn word. And he does not, because he doesn't want her to say what he knows she's thinking, which is "you think that's bad? Try being part-time coparented by the guy wearing your dead dad's corpse and his formerly demonic boyfriend."

Jack of course, is three, so he very earnestly tries to comfort Emma by saying, in the most chipper voice imaginable, "Dean almost shot me once! He didn't, but then my granddad burned my eyeballs out." At Emma's raised eyebrow at his very intact eyes: "Oh, I got better!"

Cas, Sam, and Dean have a miserable time. Emma, Jack, and Claire have a blast.

They make it a weekly thing.

winchestergifs 5k party  →   comedy / fave scene(s)

i miss vine… :’)

homophobic truck episode with a truck who just wants to run over gay people. anyway tfw to the rescue and they have to provoke the spirit somehow and sam is like ok two of us gotta do something gay, quick. cas? but cas is flat out ignoring him staring at dean. and dean is like fine fine we don’t have time to discuss this and pulls cas in for a hasty yet uncomfortably tender and charged kiss and uh oh here comes the truck 🛻

Wait. Do you. Guys remember. When ppl made a destiel wedding photo album . Can someone take one for the team and make a family photo album/wallet pics compendium. Cas at the beach eileen sitting on sam Claire hanging out w cas etc etc. you know the ones

Here is my vision:

Eileen and some dweeb (New Years 2020)

Cas’s first beach day since the prehistoric! (Summer 2019)

Mom and Jack catching the golden hour (Thanksgiving 2021)

Kicked out of the kitchen for meddling (Thanksgiving 2020)

Three generations! (Holidays 2019)

Only picture Claire didn’t get her hands on to delete (Claire’s birthday 2020)

Kid’s already got a favorite uncle (Twins’ birthday)

Lost a bet have to put “the old man chair” in here (??? Random night of the week)

supernatural // LSAT PrepTest Reading Comprehension

imo my favorite piece of spn meta ive come up with slash connected the red string lines about IS the thing with tfw and the horsemen rings

its like. okay. so if death is killed, the next reaper to die becomes death. thats how it works in-universe. HOWEVER it ALSO works this way in a narrative sense for the other four rings. see below.

dean cuts off war’s finger and steals the ring -> dean becomes war -> the mark of cain enhances dean’s already-present anger and instinct for violence to dangerous levels, to the point of harming the people around him

sam kills famine and steals the ring -> sam becomes famine -> sam continues to struggle with his demon blood addiction (literally) and continues being starved for close connections outside of his immediate circle (metaphorically)

cas cuts off pestilence’s finger and steals the ring -> cas becomes pestilence -> cas intakes all the souls of purgatory as well as the leviathan, both of which cause disturbing, disease-like damage to his vessel, and releases the leviathans into a lake as if they were a water-borne pathogen