honestly, being asexual has been weird because i think im actually kind of repulsed? but only when im actually having it or interacting with another living person. im also very interested in being active in kink communities but just. not like. in a way that involves being sexual? its hard to describe. i think its moreso intimacy repulsion? if that makes sense. im repulsed to the idea that it’ll seem more important than i find it.

my relationship with it is extremely complicated, oof.

this post didn't age well

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most damaging idea of the 21st century: the conviction of vast numbers of people that human history will end within our lifetimes

climate change represents world-altering tragedy if unchecked, but not even in the worst-case scenario does it mean “literally everyone dies”

yet so many people have jumped already to “it’s over, the world is going to end, we can do nothing about it” and are just paralyzingly cynical. How do I explain that the power to imagine a future is essential for creating it

you know the thing where trauma can cause you to just. not expect to live much longer so when you get to 30 you don’t know what to do because you thought you’d be dead by 25

That is happening to all of us right now on a society-wide scale

A lot of people are like. REALLY angry at me for suggesting that “be depressed and do nothing” isn’t necessarily the only response to climate change.

this, this, this, this, this, this, and like, 700 other sources will tell you that most of the effects of climate change will be reversible even if we pass the ‘threshold’ of a 1.5 degrees Celsius increase in global temperature

BUT. Even if the worst happens, it will be important to be doing things other than wallowing in misery???

I’m not trying to be callous but for people living today it’s wildly unlikely for the results to be “literally immediate death.”

People will get displaced from their homes by rising sea levels. We have like, years, probably decades, before that happens. It seems so fucked up to decide that we should do nothing, because we’ve already decided they’re going to die anyway????

If a bunch of us are going to die, why not die trying to help each other? Why not try to make sure fewer people die? Why not do something that might reduce someone’s suffering or give them food or clean water or a place to sleep?

I don’t know how to explain to you that people need socks during the apocalypse

I keep recommending “The Great Derangement” by Amitav Ghosh because it is a very unflinching look at how culpable we are - not for having families, or forgetting to use the right spoons - but for consistently choosing the luxurious delusions of apocalypses. People can lovingly envision a thousand apocalypses, lavishly decorated by the pop culture we’ve gobbled down; but the reverse is not true, and we lack the imagination that is quite literally needed for the future. To the point where planning for the future is actively undermined by people at all levels, stating that it’s unrealistic. We are at a turning point of human history where people are watching each other knock holes in a shared lifeboat, because “everyone knows that lifeboats are predestined to sink.”

It’s considered unrealistic to imagine the prosperous and equitable future of the next generation, because it doesn’t match pop culture. We have actively given up our responsibilities of stewardship - literally the purpose of human existence - because Hollywood made it look hard. We are forgoing our natural bonds and our collective power because we agreed that our neighbours will probably turn on us, and when we look at the self-fulfilling prophecies and natural consequences of our behavior (pandemic, natural disasters) we claim it’s evidence that we can’t improve, instead of addressing the poor behavior.

Ghosh argues that one of the most radical and revolutionary things that we can do (and in the West, the foremost ETHICAL thing to do) is to task ourselves with reprogramming our imaginations to something functional. In this scenario, everyone can participate in the work; writers can literally take readers by the hand and heal them, people can lead and teach each other on social media, unions can include it in discussions, parents can teach their children, children can teach their parents, and everyone can correct each other. Oh, and people who like boycotts and clout can start a movement demanding more imagination in media. I agree with this, and it has underpinned my work and activism ever since.

I hope this doesn’t come off wrong but;

Am I the only one that gets mildly frustrated when I hear allos talk about how being in a relationship with an asexual (or anyone that doesn’t meet their sexual needs) makes them feel, but they never seem to stop and evaluate why they feel that way?

Like, ok you are feeling insecure and unloved, but WHY?

Maybe it’s because asexuals are often made to dissect why they feel they way they do but when it comes to allos “tHaT’s JuSt HoW iT wOrKs, It’S mY nAtUrE!”

Perhaps it’s bitterness over knowing how small my dating pool is as a sex-repulsed asexual, but I can’t help but wonder. How much of the importance of sex to allo relationships is due to allo/amatonormativity? If it affected me to the point of hurting my mental health because I couldn’t fit the mold of what society told me to be, why couldn’t it affect them? Maybe I just need to sleep.

the internet HAS been turned into a series of easily swallowable pills for quick consumption and standardization and I don’t think it’s ‘boomery’ to discuss how the internet no longer feels like a wild wild west and has been massively gentrified for quick access to anything you could ever want or need and that next hit of dopamine. there is a difference between ‘social media bad’ and ‘our experiences online are increasingly manufactured by algorithms looking to make money from scraping metrics of data about who we are to either sell us stuff or sell who we are to people who will sell us stuff’

fact

actually that is WRONG here is ONE(1) source to prove it >:)

bad opinion

actual explanation and list of sources

but just when you think the post is over

"hey guys did you know that op condones dog murder and was twice arrested for vehicular manslaughter"

blocking people would be improved by having a little animation that makes their account blow up on your screen

daily reminder that ‘porn addiction’ is a myth perpetuated by far right evangelical groups.

As long as your porn consumption is not interfering with your work or social life, it’s considered normal.

Actual psychology research shows that people who identify as ‘porn addicts’ don’t actually consume more porn than average. What do they have in common? They were raised to view sex as shameful.

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2020-04888-001

It’s also commonly used as a way to avoid taking responsibility. The number of men I’ve seen saying “porn MADE me misogynistic, porn MADE me dehumanize women, porn MADE me see women as objects, porn MADE me sexually harass women.”

On the flip side, I’ve also seen women blaming porn for the same reason. Instead of. You know. Misogynistic, dehumanizing abusers.

Porn is often used as the scapegoat for a lot of problems in our world, I’ve often thought it’s the equivalent of people saying video games causes mass shootings and a rise in violence.

There’s also a good bit of evidence and studies saying an availability to porn (as well as prostitution) has shown a link to decreased sexual violence.

i’m just glad these kinds of myths only exist among far right evangelicals like could you imagine how pathetic it would be if leftists thought certain kinds of porn could taint your mind making you inevitably become some sort of awful abuser? but surely nobody would believe such a thing and ostracize people for that kind of stuff while also regularly spreading around posts like this lol

Y’all will say y’all care about autonomy on a fundamental level until people start exercising their autonomy in a way you personally don’t like. If you give a fuck about the liberation of oppressed people, then your belief in autonomy cannot be conditional. If someone isn’t hurting others, then mind your fucking business.

Source

Urgent homeless situation!

My fiance and I have been homeless and without income for a while now and with the holidays raising the price of staying in a motel, things have gotten especially hard. My car insurance is about to lapse and we have no money for food or a place to stay this weekend. If anyone could send a few dollars our way, it would mean a lot to us. Please help a homeless gay trans Latine couple out this holiday season!

Venmo: @Elsa-Leon-89

CashApp: $ElsaLeon

Zelle: [email protected]

PayPal: [email protected]

if i'm being 100% honest I don't think anyone who isn't disabled tries to get disability i legitimately do not believe it. "x amount of people make false claims" no, x amount of people who make claims are declared not disabled by the government, an institution that doesn't give a shit about disabled people and wants to find any reason to deny us assistance. if somebody goes through the effort of applying for ssi, which isn't a simple process, just for the CHANCE to get a max of $794 a month (but likely less.) and not even be able to save that money up. they are genuinely struggling with something. nobody would choose this if they had other reasonable options

Even if there are people lying I think it’s fine I hate the government and don’t mine people stealing their money

i dont know why people are like ‘we need to bully people so they are more normal’ when if the internet has been anything its been a series of longitudinal studies showing that prolonged large scale bullying tends to lead people to becoming increasingly weird, paranoid, sometimes off-putting, traumatized, emotionally troubled, ethically disregulated, etc. even unethical modalities like behaviorism don’t focus exclusively or primarily on punishment. like people should literally just be honest and say they want more bullying because they like to do it and have fun hurting other people