Actually tempted to change my url now. I just thought of one that I like but I'll sit on it for a day or two. I made this url like ten years ago back in the character did blank to you and reblogged your post days. Idk I've kind of grown attached from nostalgia so we'll see.

Nepetaclawedyoureyesoutand -> PetrichorPetals

Okay I'm gonna need one Mr Myung Jaehyun to evacuate the braincell. I don't even go here but I have brainrot over this boy.

I don't even follow boynextdoor in any capacity bc I fear this motherfucker is way too strong and yet still he haunts me on my kpop social media. 🙄 I partially blame Hanbin but it's not all mc stuff. I can't escape him and I refuse to give in because they're over 600 streams and I'm not letting a group I don't even stan be my most streamed group this year. 😫

2day my linguistics professor asked people to name some ships bc she was talking about morphology & how ship names were an example of blending and the room of 100+ people was completely silent bc who wants to expose themselves?? until this one person was like “umm johnlock” and i heard someone behind me go “oh my god……. i hate this”

This is the opposite of one of those posts that would have been wildly popular about 7 years ago that went like, “I made a reference to my OTP in class and omg, the teacher got the reference and they ship it too?? And everyone clapped.”

Character development

being in a long-term committed loving relationship with a neurodivergent person, as someone very much neurotypical, has been a beautiful exercise in both humility and communication

I am high maintenance and I am demanding, and I do expect A Lot from my partner. but for a very long time I lived in this realm of half-coded half-messages, cryptic signals and unvoiced expectations, a spiderweb-like system of relations and emotions - a realm of my own creation - where I'd feel upset and abandoned if those needs were not correctly guessed, anticipated, decoded or fulfilled. and usually that'd only result in my alienating myself and hurting myself even more than it hurt others.

with my partner now I know that those Messages and Codes and Expectations have to be explained, sometimes twice, and in great detail, ideally with examples and data to back them up - initially even called out as they happen - and only after that is done I can reattach this value and emotion to them. if my partner misses those then, I have a right to be a upset. but they're not obvious or set as default, and not knowing them intrinsically isn't my partner's way of being purposefully hurtful.

sometimes I will tell my partner something and they won't have much of a reaction. and I learned that all it takes is just giving more explanation: what I'm saying now to you means that I am upset, the words and tone are both there to tell you that I'm upset, I'm upset because of XYZ, and I would like you to react, preferably by being there for me/hugging me/listening to me.

I used to think that was ridiculous. that it was debasing, that it was humiliating, that it was me begging to be acknowledged, begging to be loved. but in this case it isn't - I only had to do it twice, maybe three times in different situations, and since then they've learned my Messages and my Codes and my Meanings. and they love me so they do their best to follow them and act on them - and ask for guidance if they're not sure. and that's love, that's what love is to me.

and the other way around - oftentimes it had to be me asking for clarification. it had to be me going "what you're saying now, your wording and your tone do not match your facial expressions and body language. what you're saying is positive but your face and body tell me you're angry and distressed" - and my partner would usually just tell me, oops, you can disregard my facial expressions because I actually didn't even know I was making them, I am actually very happy and calm now" or sometimes "what might seem like distressed to you is actually the way my body behaves when I'm just focused on explaining something to you, it's not negative, I'm actually having a great time".

sometimes it had to be me going "I really hoped you'd like this [activity/place/movie/whatever] but to me you seem bored and disinterested, can you please confirm whether you're enjoying this or if you'd prefer we do something else?" and sure, sometimes it would be "yeah I'm not that into this, sorry" but much more often it would be "I really like this but there's this one detail/smell/sensation that gets in the way of me fully enjoying it" or actually "oh no I really like this, in fact I like this to the extent where I focus mostly on it and not on acting outwards with the intention of showing I like it"

and I've learned. even when those are things that go directly against all the Codes I learned for neurotypical people in my life, I now know better. it was embarrassing and sometimes frustrating to ask and to need an explanation, but it worked so well. and that's love. again, that's love.

Tell me a soft memory

we would find out later i had burned off my entire cornea - about 65% of my eye. my doctor told me it is the organ with the highest concentration of nerve endings - i was in an amount of pain that can't be spoken.

and i was blind. for the first time in my life, i was totally blind. i kept thinking about reading, about writing. weirdly, just once, about driving. we had no idea if i would ever see again. just like that - my entire life was different.

it is a strange place to reference for a soft memory, to begin here.

my siblings were taking excellent care of me, but there was a moment in the hospital where, just through bad luck and timing - both of them had to step away for a moment. i was crying at that point; not emotionally. for 3 days after this i would still be crying, my tears, like a mermaid's, a frothy pink with blood.

my brother worried about leaving me. he had another, just-as-bad emergency.

"i got her," someone said. "don't worry."

a soft hand held mine, and then she started talking.

her name was jess. she has a wife named clyde. they live a few blocks up the street. clyde fell down, but the x-rays seem to be coming back better than expected. jess says she's got long dark hair and "more wrinkles than an elephant". jess describes every chair in the room and every person. she talks about her two kids and her cats and her favorite memories from college.

a doctor came. i had to switch to a different waiting room. i tried to stand up to follow the voice - i found jess's hand, following me. she didn't let go. she kept talking the whole way: lamp to your left, just a few more steps, okay to your right is the ugliest painting, good, now a little more walking straight, you got it baby

in the new silence of the next room she sat me down and called my brother for me, telling him where we'd gone to. and she stayed there for a bit, just chatting, her voice echoing in the eerie quiet. gently describing the room to me. and then someone was rude. from the sound of the voice, a kid, i think.

"why is she crying?"

"she just lost her vision," jess said. "she can't see."

"oh." said the kid. "that's scary."

the kid tells me he is here because he has peas stuck up his nose. that makes me laugh, his mom (?) groans. she tells me about the kid (he's 6, he likes paw patrol and eating cheese), about herself, about moving from cali.

jess says she's sorry, but she has to leave now, she's gotta go check on her wife.

"don't worry," says the mom. "i got her." and then i felt her hand press into mine.

for hours like that: i am taken care of by strangers. each person just talking with whatever comes to their head - not for any reward or celebrity or real reason, i guess. just because i am scared and alone and in the hospital and blinded and need to be distracted. not everyone even got told the story - they would just pick up in the silence with - oh by the way the television is playing HGTV - do you like that kind of a thing? yeah, me too, but could never quite get into those open-floor plans, i'll tell you -

by the time my brother is able to come back, the room is buzzing. we talk to each other like old friends, laughing, cracking jokes about if you don't like hospital food wait until you get on an airplane and can't believe i'm up past two in the morning what a party animal i'm becoming. i am holding the hands of someone named drew, who likes my crow tattoo and making crochet snails.

there are many dark moments full of pain in this world. this - in the low of absolute-dark, absolute-pain: people find a way to paint in it anyway. the color splash of their voices: this triumphant, radiating kindness of - let's be here together, let me help you, let's keep going.

i never saw their faces. i can't remember many of their names. but i think about them often, and the way we all took a deep breath - and did something gentle amongst the pain.

Most of us could probably stand to benefit from reading this. I did. It’s really lovely.

x

this is mind boggling levels of insane. if you've never done needlefelting you can't quite comprehend how fucking difficult it is to not only make things so precise at such a small scale but like, not get the fibers tangled into literally everything else they interact with. and then ANIMATING it??? bro this is witchcraft

LMAO the last one! The strongman’s immediately like “No. No, absolutely not. Nope.” and the bodybuilder looks around like “Are you kidding me? I’ll die. You know that, right? I’ll die?”

The Rogue, the Paladin, the Barbarian have a day to themselves and enjoy some friendly competition.

This is such a fun video to watch. Not only do you see 3 versions of masculine fitness and strength but with each movement you can almost see where their weight is distributed and where they place their control. Which makes it fun to think about body builds and fantasy characters.

There's a middle aged dad that lives downstairs and he stopped me in the hallway today and was like "what size shirt yo boyfriend wear?" And I was like "large to xl....?" And he hurried into his apartment and came out with some polos and jeans and stuff for Axel and was like "I got these an Platoes Closet and cant return them so I thought I'd see if yall would want them" I'm like. I don't even know this guys name I just call him Mr. Dad (not to his face) and aaa there are nice people out there still!!! 😭😭😭

Also like a year ago when I got a knock in Britney's engine Mr. Dad saw me crying in the parking lot while my uncle (a mechanic) was telling me the car was fucked and the next day he stopped me in the hallway to check on me and was like. Ready to fight my uncle because he thought that he was my dad and he was making me cry lol

He’s also a single father of two teenage boys and he fosters kids occasionally too. I only ever found out because sometimes (he’s black) he’ll have some lil white kids following him around lol.

I need to learn this man’s name. And then bake him cookies.

And he’s a good dad too. His kids are always holding doors for me and offering to help me like carry up groceries. Dude…. There’s still good in this world and the kids are alright

Went and knocked on Mr. Dad’s door and his oldest boy answered, and Mr. Dad is already at work. I told Mr. Dad Jr. that I was on a mission. We are now currently conspiring in his living room to bake Mr. Dad his favorite cookies.

His name is Cornelius!

Made him and his kiddos oatmeal raisin cookies and they love them ☺️

I think the greatest irony of my life is when the cafeteria at my college changed all the lights to blue bulbs for “autism awareness”, which fucked with my sensory issues badly enough that I could barely stand to be in the building

I was certainly aware of my autism, at least.

Stuffed Animal dashboard simulator

🐻feltedfur Follow

pray for me human put me in the wash on fucking hot water im never gonna be the same colors

23 notes

🐇velveteen-everything Follow

got left outside in the backyard but this is kinda nice actually im okay with this (:

🐇velveteen-everything Follow

the hawks

14.1k notes

🐉shinyscales Follow

this is bullshit ive been bragging to everyone in the toy chest because my tag says i was made with love but i got torn today and guess what. its just stuffing inside

🥽pooltoy82 Follow

lol imagine having stuff inside you lmao

🐉shinyscales Follow

i literally see you outside the window looking smug. log off

4 notes

🦭 sealofapproval Follow

FELL OFF THE BED HELP HELP HELP HELP

🐭 m4m4_p0ssum Follow

WHY ARE YOU POSTING ON PLUSHBLR INSTEAD OF KEEPING WATCH FOR MONSTERS THATS YOUR HUMANS ROOM

990 notes

🐭 plushiepolls Follow

🐉shinyscales Follow

lets not spread body dysmorphia on plushblr guys

🧑 thatoneweirdhumanplushie Follow

op casually ignoring stuffed animals with different colored fabric for eyes

▶️ stuffedyoutooz Follow

some of us dont even have eyes!

13k notes

🐶 newdogtoy22 Follow

i know animals are allowed to see normal plushies moving and talking but whats the rule for dog toys.

▶️ stuffedyoutooz Follow

what breed of dog op

🐶 newdogtoy22 Follow

poodle? does it matter?

▶️ stuffedyoutooz Follow

no i just wanted to remind you your lifespan can be measured in days

🐶 newdogtoy22 Follow

man come on

20 notes

I was a pretty sickly kid. I'm a pretty sickly adult too I guess. But one of the issues I had was constant ear infections. I almost went deaf because I just had near continuous swelling and inflammation going on. I had tubes in my ears twice because they fell out the first time.

If you're unfamiliar that's where they put a tiny gauge in your inner ear to help force it open. It's meant to stop water getting trapped back there. I had to put wax in my ears before contact with pools, baths, showers, anything, for years, to prevent water from slinking through that narrow channel and festering long enough to spawn bacteria.

It was miserable. To this day my inner ear is blighted with so much scar tissue that every single ear exam the doctor goes, "Woah." You never want to hear a doctor say woah. It's never good.

Eventually my constant rounds of antibiotics and misery was pinned on my tonsils. A doctor declared there was just too much ick hiding out in there and they had to go. I was about five or six at the time. Having surgery as a little kid is already pretty scary but I was determined to be brave. I'd already had vacuum suction tools used on my inner ear weekly a practice so painful it's banned now. I was also promised a coveted troll dinosaur for good behavior.

So I walked tremulously into the hospital to have an organ removed. By all accounts I comported myself admirably. Afterward I was coming out of anesthesia quite slowly. The nurse was carrying me back to my parents when I rasped a whispery, "Knock knock," at her.

She paused and looked down at me, "What?"

A little stronger I repeated, "Knock knock."

She was shocked her tiny patient was trying to tell a joke while higher than a kite but dutifully said, "Who's there?"

"Adam," I said in a wavery little voice.

She leaned closer to hear me, "Adam who?"

I bellowed through my raw throat, still freshly bleeding from surgery, "Adam my way, I'm gettin' outta here!"

The nurse had to stop she was laughing so hard and she was in hysterics when she delivered me back to me parents, repeating the whole episode to them, turning their anxiety into delight that their doped up child was a comedy genius.

No one knew where I'd learned the joke, but it was a staple story throughout my childhood.