@our-future-is-up-to-us-2 / our-future-is-up-to-us-2.tumblr.com
Oh no! The ice cream is too hard to scoop! How can we solve this issue?
Jaskier: gets geralt to do it for him
Eskel: waits patiently for ice cream to melt a little, then scoops
Geralt: uses his Witcher strength and forces the spoon through the ice cream. (Yes it bends in half a dozen times, yes he gets frustrated, no he doesn't stop)
Lambert: microwaves the spoon
I imagine the equivalent of Kaer Morhen in a Modern AU being that all the Witchers are flatmates, living next door, all in the same unit/apartment etc.
With that in mind...
Jaskier one day just realising how hopelessly in love with Geralt he is. Imagine he lives opposite the hall from Geralt, and it’s the early hours of the morning. The Witcher’s got his head smashed into his pillow, fast asleep, snoring loudly.
The bard thinks of nothing better than to come over to Geralt’s unit, storm straight in, and start jamming on the lute and screaming:
“BUT MAMA I’M IN LOVE WITH A CRIMINAL!”
Geralt, waking up in a shock and daze: JASKIER WHERE’S THE CRIMINAL?! I WILL FIGHT THEM- *obviously far too tired to move* If there’s no one here, what are you doing-?
Jaskier, awkwardly stepping back out: *whispering* And this type of love isn’t rational, it’s physical-
Bacon wrapped everything is the reason jaskier wins over all the wolf witchers.
He's on permanent kitchen duty
The first time Lambert had bacon wrapped bacon. He LOST HIS SHIT
The next week, Jaskier deep fries the bacon wrapped bacon.
Lambert and eskel propose to him.
(Cue geralt screaming in the background)
Lambert: scooby doo lived in a van and he turned out fine!
Papa vesemir: *exhausted sigh*
Eskel: no no, he’s got a point
The wolves being covered in tattoos. Sleeves, across their chests and backs, some sneaking up their necks etc.
They fuss over how brave jaskier was when he got his ankle tattoo.
(Its super tiny and he needed to hold someone's hand the entire time. He's super proud of it)
Baby ciri and jaskier doing a "concert" for the wolves. They call out for their favorite songs, and cheer on the duo.
Lambert ruins it by trying to crowd surf.
Tries to dive into the crowd of four. Eskel, Geralt and Vesemir all take a step away as soon as he’s midair, leaving him to bellyflop poor Aiden.
Ok, I’m sorry, but now I’m just imagining Aiden catching him and it’s just the lift from dirty dancing.
Fortunately, Jaskier is On It, and segues into The Time of My Life
This is how everyone learns that Lambart and Aiden have that whole dance routine memorized and perfected
