For Geralt/Jaskier, the ‘people don’t realise they’re together’ trope is a bummer in canon because of witcher racism, but you could have a blast with it in an AU, though, like,
Jaskier is a folk artist, popular but either still up-and-coming or without a huge online presence; I’m feeling, like, self-titled album era Hozier. Anyway, his agents get him a slot on a Graham Norton to perform and promote his new single, and he joins the rest of the guests on the sofa at the end.
“Now, I don’t know if you know this but besides the new song, you’ve actually been trending on social media recently.”
Jaskier blinks. “No, no I didn’t know that, really?”
“Yes, yes of course. Twitter has been obsessed this week with your bodyguard, the rather dashing one with the man bun. It’s like the thing with the Fiji Water Girl all over again, only this time he looks like he could benchpress a horse.”
On the sofa next to him, Cameron Diaz giggles into her wine. Jaskier, who has a feeling he knows where this is going, does the same, letting out an enquiring hmmm? over the rim of the glass.
“I believe the most popular hashtag was,” Graham squints at the queue cards in his hand, “#BardsBootyguard. Do we - ah, yes, we have a picture, here we go.”
Up on the screen flashes a image, and the audience laughs. It’s a collage of paparazzi photographs and candids pulled off social media. In all of them, though Jaskier is at the forefront of the shot, never too far behind is a tall, broad man with a shock of silver-bleached hair. In a few of the pictures, he’s obviously mid-action of opening a door, or flagging down a taxi, or lifting an instrument case. In that last one, Jaskier is quite clearly and expressively protesting that he can do himself. The other man, by comparison, looks entirely unmoved. They really are a study in contrasts.
Eventually the audience quietens, awaiting his response, and Graham looks to him eagerly.
“Do you… do you mean my husband?”
