My head is always in the clouds.

I have miles and miles of proof that I’ve only ever been used for sex.

I’ve gotten layers of ‘compliments’ calling me sexy, and hot, but very rarely am I told I’m beautiful. I’ve been told I have amazing blow job eyes and soft lips, but no one ever notices the scar under my eyebrow, or how my cheek dimples when I smile. I’ve been overly sexualized since the age of 14 years old; ever since I grew tits, I’ve been called jailbait. My skin is soft, but it grows harder and tougher every time a man asks me “your place or mine?” As if I’m not deserving enough to take out on a date. As if I’m not good enough as a person to be cared about and held; as if my hopes and dreams mean little to nothing to anyone but myself.

I shutter at the thought of one night stands, and hooking up with people who don’t give a damn about who I am, who I want to be.

Sex is great, but what is it worth if I feel empty inside, when their fingers feel like knives across my skin?