You know the fictional portrayal of a trans character is on-point when their fictional therapy session actually sorta fucking gets to you.
Like yes, maybe I do in part feel compelled to press myself with ever greater fidelity into the mold of an attractive, highly sexual woman to compensate for the inherent feeling of inadequacy in my ability to attain femininity I get from having been AMAB and gone through testosterone puberty. That's a damn good point, fictional therapist in a TV show.
The complicating factor with that though is that it's not that I'm doing something I don't enjoy out of a feeling of obligation; rather, I am fighting to make myself someone I genuinely want to be and to do things I genuinely want to do, I just can't really shake the feeling that I'm always five steps behind everyone else due to the circumstances of my birth and the less mutable ways my body is shaped.
Maybe that does make me want to go further, harder and faster than I might otherwise in order to compensate, but then why shouldn't I, honestly I deserve to feel like I can have what I want instead of being locked out of it.