Today's Seal Is: A Feast For The Ages
"I usually demand all payment up front but I'm so desperate for this $30 commission I'll complete half of it first, for this client who for whatever reason refuses to use paypal and says they have 'trust issues'" - The devil whispering in my ear apparently.
In general, it’s important to always remember: the hard times never end, but because they never end, they aren’t really hard times, they’re just times. It’s all just life.
Reading Freddie de Boer trying to be optimistic and uplifting is like the proverbial dancing bear: he does it poorly, but the impressive thing is that he does it at all.
Chicxulub Impact, 65 Million BC
In May 2022, the chief financial officer of Boar’s Head, the processed meat company, was asked a simple question under oath. “Who is the C.E.O. of Boar’s Head?” “I’m not sure,” he replied. “Who do you believe to be the C.E.O. of Boar’s Head?” the lawyer persisted. The executive, Steve Kourelakos, who had worked at the company for more than two decades and was being deposed in a lawsuit between owners, repeated his answer: “I’m not sure.” It is odd, to say the least, when a top executive of a company claims not to know who his boss is. And Boar’s Head is no fly-by-night enterprise. The company is one of the country’s most recognizable deli-meat brands; it generates what employees and others estimate as roughly $3 billion in annual revenue and employs thousands of people.
If only we were a Free Country who could decide this on the basis of rival hit squads by the claimants
It's the boar. It says so right in the name.
Saw a mechanic with a 'Hail Repairs' sign and thought for a sec they meant 'hail' in the 'all hail the king' sense.
Yes Nut Yesvember #positivtyposting
At my fucking limit with this one.
The epistemology crisis has gotten so bad that football coaches are reverting to animist worship of a solar deity.
I wonder exactly which day it was that the amount of time Comedy Central had spent broadcasting The Daily Show finally caught up to the amount of time they had spent broadcasting PCU
This was supposed to be a culture war joke, in fairness on further reflection I was like “yeah but maybe put all the hours of South Park, Tosh.0, and The Man Show on the PCU side too.” Maybe the Kilborn years, even.
Okay, for the benefit of all the followers I’m getting with absurd ages in their profiles, let me explain this one.
When Comedy Central started in the ‘90s, they didn’t have much original programming, and what they did was mostly one-off (but frequently rerun) specials - filmed standup sets, basically.
So what they ran was mostly secondhand content they’d picked up rights to, and what was most common were these two movies, I swear to god I’d seen them run back to back and then over again, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen the same one run twice in a row. One was Throw Momma From The Train, a Danny DeVito comedic riff on Strangers On A Train.
The other was PCU, a campus comedy in the Animal House vein starring a visibly balding Jeremy Piven. It was a lovable frat fighting the dean and his Young Republican lackeys, but (because “boat shoe and dinner jacket-wearing WASPs” were overdone and increasingly anachronistic as villains by then) there was a third faction that took the brunt of the mockery: earnest, censorious social issue activists. Thus the title. The climax involved the activists protesting the big frat party (tagline: “Everyone Gets Laid”), but then realizing “holy shit, we’re against drinking, sex, parties, freedom, and fun, we’re the bad guys” and giving up and chilling out and hooking up with the frat members.
Because obviously you were supposed to see that as the only acceptable position for anyone with any pretensions to being cool and with it. Like I said, ‘60s-derived social liberalism used to offer something for everyone.
And it’s not like oooo, this was acceptable once upon a time, it’s that when I was growing up, this was the official line of media social liberalism. Who was that anon asking about the ‘90s? In the '90s, liberal Hollywood was putting out “message movies” the messages of which were America Is Finally Free, Thanks To Brave Heroes Like Larry Flynt Depicting Women As Violently Degraded Sex Objects, And Thank God For His Heirs Like Howard Stern, Still Fighting The Good Fight.
If you don’t know who Howard Stern is, he was the foremost crude “Morning Zoo” radio DJ in the country.
Like, in the '90s, white, blue collar (or “dudebro”) tits-n-beer vulgarity was plausibly coded left/liberal/Democratic. And that’s a little disorienting to remember.
I mean hell, Benny Hill was aired in part by an official arm of the most socialist Anglosphere government ever. Benny Hill.
If you’ve never seen Benny Hill, it’s from the British “light entertainment” tradition, a little variety but kind of sketch comedy, only a lot of the “comedy” was basically dirty old man leering. Sketch leering. Episodes famously ended with sped up comedic chase scenes where Benny would try to catch and grope some pretty young girls, then turn and run away as they tried to catch and punish him.
Now by the '90s that was already a bit off, but still, it ran in reruns on Comedy Central. It ran on fucking PBS.
If you ever wonder why intelligent educated sensitive me is wary of if not actively hostile to so much of what passes for modern cultural liberalism, it’s because it pattern-matches so closely not only to the apocalypse visions conservatives were warning of when I was growing up, but to the liberals’ versions as well.
Kontextmaschine had a take ready for “zoomer men drifting right”
I’m so sorry has everybody seen this bots of new york
the Master whose oracle is at Delphi does not speak, does not dissimulate; he signifies
Happy birthday Jimmy.
imagine how much more fucked up the history of the world would be if eating someone's brains reliably conferred on you their memory and knowledge
huh. didnt kno u could get that in a can
hey, chatbot, how do i install arch Linux?
chatbot: