@northisnotup / northisnotup.tumblr.com
truly one of the funniest things about lotr to me is how much hostility the hobbits, a race of cheerful, fun-loving farm people, bear towards gandalf for absolutely NO reason except that he kills their chill vibe
the hobbits of the shire whenever they hear gandalf is in town:
more sad insecure Nori things, in which he pushes Dwalin away and Dwalin doesn’t know what to do anymore or why it’s like this or what he did to get that reaction (he didn’t do anything really)
The house is quiet by the time Dwalin comes home. The nurse is gone as well, when he checks. Nori has been sending her away early more and more often lately, but she’s told Dwalin that’s normal at this point.
He goes to the nursery first, but the cot is empty. Curious, he goes to their bedroom next, and there he finds Falin, lying beside Nori, sound asleep. Nori is rubbing Falin’s belly softly, humming to him. The sight of them causes a glow in his chest, and he comes closer, admiring the fall of Nori’s hair around his shoulders and curling on the bed. He’s always loved Nori’s hair.
Nori used to let Dwalin brush and braid it. He hasn’t had that privilege in an age though, not since before Falin was born. Nori looks peaceful now though, more himself. Maybe Dwalin can ask tonight.
“How was he, today?” Dwalin asks, seeming to startle Nori. Had he not noticed Dwalin coming in?
“His stomach was hurting him,” Nori replies, still rubbing Falin’s belly. “I just now got him to sleep.” Falin sniffles, and smacks his lips a little, but doesn’t open his eyes or stir.
Dwalin waits for more, but when nothing comes, he prompts Nori for more. “Did he lift his head any, today?”
Nori glances at Dwalin over his shoulder, but doesn’t really look at him, his eyes on the dressing table. “Quite a bit today, actually. The nurse thinks he might start to roll soon. She says he’s strong.”
“That’s my lad,” Dwalin praises, careful to keep his voice down. “Durin’s line makes strong Dwarves. He’ll be swinging an axe before we know it.” Nori sighs, and turns away from Dwalin, confusing him. “Or, maybe knives. Or a mace.” He names Nori’s chosen weapons brightly, hoping to appease him. Maybe he thinks Dwalin is going to force Falin to the axe, as Fundin had tried to force the sword on Dwalin. “Maybe no weapon at all.”
It doesn’t seem to help, so Dwalin covers his shoulder with his hand, working his thumb in, before combing his fingers through Nori’s hair, winding it around his fingers. He kisses the lock, coming closer in the bed, determined to have Nori in his arms at least once today.
“Stop,” Nori demands waspishly, all but yanking away from Dwalin. “Falin is sleeping.”
Nori’s been cold as of late, but he’s never outright rejected Dwalin’s touch like this. “I only meant…” he tries, swallowing heavily. “I just wanted to hold you.” It sounds foolish, out loud. Worse, it sounds like begging. “Nothing else.” Does Nori really think so little of Dwalin? Since when? What has Dwalin done to deserve that?
“Falin’s been fussy today. I’m tired.” He says it like an accusation, not an excuse.
“I’m sorry,” Dwalin apologises any way. Nori does get snappish when he’s tired, always has. Falin must be exhausting, especially if he’s been unwell. “Go to sleep, my love.” He starts to disrobe himself, intending to lie down beside him.
Only then Nori says, “He’s going to wake up tonight, and you have the morning shift. You should sleep in the other room.”
Dwalin thinks Nori could have put one of his knives in Dwalin’s chest, and it would hurt less than this, as he stares down at his husband’s back. “I don’t mind,” he tries.
“Your guards will,” Nori says more firmly.
He doesn’t want Dwalin in their bed.
Some part of him wants to climb into bed and force Nori against his chest, make him tell Dwalin why he didn’t want Dwalin any more, why he didn’t seem to love Dwalin any more. But most of him doesn’t want to feel Nori struggle against his hold, doesn’t want to hear Nori actually say the words.
“You’re likely right,” he concedes. “Sleep well, my love.” He reaches around Nori, and strokes Falin’s cheek. “And you, my lad.”
Once he’s in the other room, in the bed meant for guests, he lies there, awake, for far too long. Every time he closes his eyes, he feels Nori’s rejection, feels the chill in their marriage. He had thought Nori loved him. He’d seemed to love him, in the beginning. He’d been happy when he found out he was bearing, and Dwalin had thought that meant Nori wanted him forever.
Now he’s not even wanted in their bed. His chest clenches painfully as the old doubts start to resurface. Nori is far cleverer than Dwalin will ever be, and even Thorin had wondered how he got a pretty ‘Ri. They were married because Nori had been bearing. But what if that was now the only reason for Nori?
Through the wall, Dwalin hears the silence. Falin sleeps through the night.
I hate you both right now. ;___;
AND NOW WE BROKE PARIAH
We are bad people, Sparkle. Bad people.
That said, jesus, Pariah, gorgeous as always.
#THIS FATE COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED IF BILBO HAD HAD A SASSY GAY FRIEND #WHAT WHAT WHAT ARE YOU DOING BILBO? #OH WE’RE PICKING JEWELRY UP OFF THE GROUND NOW ARE WE? #PUT THE RING DOWN #LEAVE IT #IT’S TACKY #IT’S BEEN WORN BY A FIVE HUNDRED-YEAR-OLD HALF-DEAD HOUSE-ELF #YOU DON’T KNOW WHERE HE’S BEEN STICKING IT #BILBO YOU STUPID BITCH
