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@nonsensethoughtz

。⊹₊°⋆.*all original writing*.⋆°₊⊹。
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she doesn’t like me. she likes the fact that i like her.

she plays with me. flirts with me. and then doesn't text, doesn't call.

she claims she likes me "too much".

that she's emotionally unavailable and wouldn't be a good girlfriend.

that's fine, if that were true.

but the truth is, she just doesn't like me.

she likes how she can make me squirm. how she knows i'll do anything she asks. how powerful i make her feel by being so helplessly obsessed with her.

i just wish she wouldn't lie.

i'd rather hear "i don't like you like that" come from her lips as truth than "i like you" knowing it's a lie.

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this is the first time in a while that i've actually cared. i usually have this protective layer which prevents me from fully caring but also from being hurt. it used to be "you lost feelings? that's fine girl i understand." and now i think it will actually hurt if she decides she doesn't like me anymore. and that's so exciting and scary because i hated how i couldn't fully love before. i always kept myself at a safe distance in case things went poorly. but this time i'm actually scared i'll get hurt. and i'm so happy to know it's a possibility.

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