Murex Dibromoindigo

If you’re LGBT reblog and tag with your opinion on beer.

some sobriety ideas

I have an experiment to recommend to people who have a hard time coming up with sober things to do in their time off.

Just start picking random clubs, classes, events, etc. Once day off per week, experiment with these activities stone cold sober. For every two things you dislike about it, take a minute to observe one thing that is okay or even a positive. Carry on the rest of your week as usual, rinse, repeat. Once a month, sit down and look back on your pro/“I like this bit” lists from the month and pick your next activities by looking for things more like the stuff that was okay or fun. Rinse and repeat.

Eventually you will have a list of qualities to social activities that you know you enjoy REGARDLESS of whether or not you drink. Try to incorporate as many things as you want in your life that have these qualities. Maintain an “every other time” drinking dynamic where if you drank at one thing, you’re sober at the next thing. Start to learn what things you genuinely enjoy more when able to drink [or whatever else it is that usually helps you relax] and what things are just as good for you or maybe even better when you’re sober. Begin to incorporate this understanding of your relationship with joy and fun vs substance support. Congratulations on developing a functional relationship with substance support and organic satisfaction, reflect and adjust as desired going forward.

I don’t drink alcohol and I’ve found that an important part of it is considering your social circle. If the people around you are only hanging out in the context of partying/drinking/getting intoxicated, see if you can coax them into doing other activities every now and again. And if you can’t, it’s time to find a new social circle

For me personally, I have no issue being around other people drinking (but that is just me and does not mean that everyone should be ok with it!!) and I don’t mind going out to bars with friends, so long as the drinking itself is not the Main Activity™️. I go to a bar with friends weekly for a trivia night, and because trivia is the main focus I don’t feel out of place hanging out.

Also, mocktails! It can sometimes suck going out with friends where everyone is ordering alcohol and you’re just drinking water or soda. A mocktail usually makes me feel more included and also signals to me that the space I’m in is accessible and welcoming of people who don’t drink for whatever reason. (You can also just order virgin versions of most cocktails and if the bar isn’t shitty they will happily make one for you)

And btw, there are sooooo many reasons why someone might not drink. Maybe they’re in recovery. Maybe they’re a devout Muslim. Maybe they just dislike the taste. Maybe they’re on medication that can’t be taken with alcohol. Maybe they’re pregnant or breastfeeding. Or maybe they just don’t enjoy drinking. Whatever reason it is, it is nobody’s business but theirs. If someone tries to make you feel shitty about not drinking or gives you a hard time about it or demands an explanation, that’s not a person worth hanging out with.

When I was in rehab I had a roommate who was this little old black lady and she was completely blind. And I saw that and was like “anybody gonna be this lady’s guide?” And didn’t wait for an answer. I actually got in trouble for “perpetuating lesbianism” BECAUSE I WOULD LEAD HER BY THE FUCKIN HAND. And that was “”too gay for the program”” so I had to make sure she held my elbow instead and like. What really pissed me off is that she was not given aid whatsoever for her disability. It was fucking me doing her paperwork. I was able to help her sign her own name but I had to fill out all of her intake stuff and ask all these invasive ass demographic questions like don’t you motherfuckers have a guy for that??? I’m here trying to fucking recover too, not interrogate this poor woman with questions about whether or not she’s ever been raped or abused or whatever

I remember one night early on, neither of us could sleep so we were just talking about anything and everything and she eventually asked “why’s a nice little white girl like you taking care of me like this?” (For context I was in detox with her, and you’re not the best version of yourself in detox by far, and we had both said some pretty rude things to each other) and I didn’t really know how to answer other than say “because… it’s the right thing to do?” And she got quiet and said softly “you’ll change when you’re older. The world is a cruel place for addicts” and I said “so why not take care of each other? Why not be the one source of compassion in a cruel world?” And she got quiet again and eventually gave a sad sigh and said “I pray the world doesn’t beat that kindness out of you… because it sure will try”

i love you sober friendly spaces i love you restaurants w mocktails on the menu i love you social events not hosted at bars i love you bringing non-alcoholic drinks to parties i love you shamelessly being sober so people know it’s accepted i love you not making fun of ppl who don’t drink i love you still inviting people who don’t drink to social events where ppl are drinking if u know they’re comfortable w it i love you normalizing not drinking

my step mom was asking me more questions about the nonbinary thing and after talking to me for a bit, she said "oh, so youre a rosé! not a chardonnay transitioning to a merlot, just your own unique type" which was such a middle aged white woman way to frame it, but i cannot lie gang. it did make me want to cry

Summer Solstice Lavender & Mint Lemonade with Wildflower Honey by Moody Moons

Chieko Terasawa

CREATURE????

just when you think it couldn’t be worse, you have to battle a creature

I’m choosing to believe him because I think there should still be mystery and adventure in the world

Okay I looked this one up. He said he talked to God, made up some songs, and lost nine kilos during his 20ish hours in the water. He was also completely nude when he was rescued.

hero’s journey

and this man? Odysseus

he also ate some kind of stick

I’ve never understood live fast and die young mentalities. Mostly because I’ve met a bunch of old people who never stopped living fast.

Why try to die young when you can be an old man at a rave?

The world needs more old women in denim dresses doing shots at the family picnic. You’d deprive us all of that? You’d just let your chaotic personality go to waste? I just can’t wrap my head around that.

You’ve gotta think long term. When I’m a fat old man I’m gonna start wearing a wizard hat and collect vaguely orb shaped paperweights.

Live fast die old surrounded by weird stuff from the experiences that brought you joy

i don't know what younger person needs to hear this, but it is so valid to not want to drink alcohol at all, or to only want to drink very rarely. don't let others pressure you into joining in with those societal rituals. it is an outrage how normalized drinking alcohol is, to the point that those who choose to abstain are constantly forced to justify their private choices, be publicly questioned about what led to these choices or excluded from activities altogether. you do not ever need to justify your reasons for this. there are absolutely valid and important reasons to not drink, and nobody has a right to know your personal reasonings.

"I have two literature degrees and no words. This is fucked up."

We took the drunk train home.

They were all absolutely infatuated with him and whispering about how much they wanted to pet him and then shushing each other saying “no that’s rude you can’t! just leave him alone!” so I told them they can pet him if they want and they were absolutely overwhelmed with happiness, while simultaneously being very concerned for his well-being, continually asking if I was very sure that it was okay and that I should please please tell them if I need them to leave him alone.

Basically, it was a great ending to a VERY long day. Sometimes people are really great.

the composition here is honestly close enough to a medieval painting, and just fuckin beautiful in 2138908 ways, that i think we can go ahead and hang this in a museum, thanks

need a full body massage a margarita 400mg of ibuprofen a plate of brownies at least an hour in a jacuzzi and 20,000 dollars cash

[Image ID: a screenshot of tags on this post reading: #the mouse after you give him a cookie /End ID]

Postcards, ca. 1908 

Yes

[Image ID: screenshot of a tweet by twitter user DanceSafe (@DanceSafe) reading: This is probably a good time to remind everyone that if you buy someone a drink you're buying them a drink. You're not buying a conversation. Or a kiss. Or sex. Viewing intimacy as a transaction is predatory behavior. /End ID]

Okay but imagine you’re a tiny lizard living your humble & scaly life well hidden inside tomato leaves and then one day God starts leaving hills of brownies and avocado toasts three times the size of your head right by your front door.

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