no i posted this as a joke but now i'm actually fucked up thinking about how cratered your self esteem would have to be for this to be true. like the only way any of stede's actions make any sense at all is if he is just totally incapable of imagining the possibility that other people might want him in their lives enough to be hurt by his absence
he's surprised his daughter, whom he clearly did love and spend time with, was angry that he left. the entire time he's in bridgetown he is clearly thinking about ed a whole lot but at no point is there the slightest suggestion that it's occurred to him to worry about how ed is reacting to what he did. that's insane! even when he's talking to the orange it's "how was your day, edward?" not "do you think you'll ever forgive me?" he thinks there's a chance ed had a nice day! he literally does not think ed is going to be upset at all.
it doesn't even come up after he's realized he's in love! and he's not sad or anxious like you'd expect if he thought he was in unrequited love, either, so he either knows ed loves him back or he thinks he might in the future. and yet he has not been able to put together that what ed being in love with him would mean is that he ripped ed's heart out by not showing up.
he knows that ed surrendered to the crown to save his life and said stede made him happy and kissed him and asked him to run away together and looked like he was on the verge of weeping with joy when stede said yes. he knows that he loves ed and that ed might love him back. and he is totally unable to assemble the clues and figure out what's going on for ed right now, not because he's actually dumb or oblivious but because the correct answer is so far outside the realm of possibility as far as he's concerned that it would never even occur to him. he simply cannot concieve of the idea of stede bonnet holding that kind of power over another person's heart.
man i'm not saying anything new here but like. figuring out what he did to ed is going to wreck him
