when I was drowning I thought about the light instead of the water, the accident instead of the ache.
— Yves Olade
#i found this quote from reading a httyd fic that wasnt even that long. maybe 5k words. and i cried FOUR FUCKING TIMES DURING IT#anyway. ive been stuck on this fucking quote for them ever since#I KNEW I COULDNT KEEP YOU FROM THE START. WHAT IF I THROW UP.#bbc merlin#merthur#merlinedit#‘happy’ 11 years I GUESS. fuck my life man