being an ace/aro writer in a class of non-ace/aro writers is just a huge reminder than so many people don’t view found family or platonic partnership as something deeply emotional and important. Like I keep getting the question “why does character A care about character B if they aren’t attracted to each other?” or insinuations that romance and sex are the height of love and therefore should be in every story
like I’m tired of hearing “lol I really thought they were gonna get together at the end” just because there are two characters that care deeply for each other. They ARE together dummy, just not romantically or sexually!! There’s so much more to love than those two things.
I m not aro or ace but honestly people put waaaaay too much emphasis on romance. I love romance but it isn't the Only Thing out there
^^
yes!!!! people will talk about ways that two people are devoted to each other as "proof" the feelings are romantic. im not even aro but my platonic relationships are incredibly important to me, and it feels belittling when people try and describe romance as the only form of true and powerful devotion
Ohman. I’ve gotten mad at people arguing ships I support with this kind of ‘no one cares that deeply without romantic motive” bs
I 100% love found family and platonic love stories as much as romantic ones, but I know I am not in the majority. (Also, I’m demi, and survived much of my life due to found family, which probably makes something of a diffference, tbh.) That said, I’d very much like to point out that a lot of the time, if someone thinks that sexually intimate romantic love is the only type that’s important, it’s because that’s how they’ve been socialized/taught. It’s part and parcel of the whole, “Once you’re 18, it’s time to go out and go to college/get a job/become an adult with a ‘real’ life” mindset that’s been entrenched in US society since at least the midcentury years, to the point that Hollywood shows it as the norm. This typically includes finding “the one” you’ll spend the rest of your life with, and once you do, you’re expected to live as a family with that person, and only that person, on your own little island of self-sufficiency. I know that it’s not your job to be understanding and teach them better in the here and now. But I’m looking forward to the days when fiction written by you, and others like you, starts to help people to learn (or re-learn,) about the importance of the other forms of love. (As an aside, I’d also like to see some stories involving romantic love that isn’t sexual in nature. Because I’d love for more people to learn that it’s possible to have a relationship that is romantic, without it having to be sexual.)