This came to me suddenly and I just had to make it

i have to say it is funny that of all the reasons you shouldn't let cats roam around outside unattended the only one that outdoor cat owners care about is the possibility that someone could steal your cat and keep it inside. literally this

This is because snow doesn't bounce sound waves like concrete does. When the world is like this it's LITERALLY quieter. The snow muffles sound

let’s pour one out for all the janitors who clean and never get enough appreciation

Don’t they gotta clean up what we pour out

fuck stop it everyone the post is cancelled everyone please stop fuck what have I done

that's me

girl help i've trapped myself into a self-fulfilling prophecy of loneliness and isolation

Hana-Rawhiti Kareariki Maipi-Clarke, the youngest MP in Aotearoa, starts a haka to protest the first vote on a bill reinterpreting the 1840 Treaty of Waitangi

More context from Instagram, for the non NZs out there.

I'm obsessed

local woman who claimed she will "cross that bridge when she comes to it" arrives at said bridge

reports are coming in that she is now burning said bridge

maybe if you bundled yourself up and went for a walk out in the cold then came back inside with rosy cheeks and cool skin and warmed yourself up with a nice warm cup of herbal tea with honey maybe then you'd calm down

If you're ever worried about whether your writing is too self indulgent, I just want you to remember that Sharknado had 5 sequels. I'm only partway through watching Sharknado 6: It's About Time, but already they've traveled through time and ridden a pteronadon into a Sharknado so they could use the magic teleportation portal inside of it to travel forward in time to King Arthur's time, where they are currently battling a Sharknado full of fire-breathing dragon sharks with Excalibur, which is a chainsaw sword that calls lightning. You're fine. In fact, be a little more self indulgent if anything.

daily affirmations:

if I got carried away by the harpies I would accept my fate because I respect women