narutolists reblogged
Etsy Shop!
Hi guys!
I have opened up my Etsy shop and now have a Naruto Akatsuki cloak pin avaliable for preorder!
I would appreciate anyone who preorders one! Thanks! x
Etsy Shop!
Hi guys!
I have opened up my Etsy shop and now have a Naruto Akatsuki cloak pin avaliable for preorder!
I would appreciate anyone who preorders one! Thanks! x
Enamel Pins
Hi guys!
If you collect enamel pins and would be interested in Naruto themed pins, please head on over to my new instagram >> pixelfawnpins << and let me know if you’d be interested in having my Akatsuki cloak design made into a pin! Enough interest will allow me to open preorders to fund it and even create more designs in the future!
This is something I’ve wanted to do for a while and with recent events in my life I’m striving to do things I want to do instead of just saying “maybe another time”.
Have a great week!
-MH
Akatsuki’s Casual Wear
What sort of clothes would the Akatsuki wear if they went casual in a modern AU?
1. Pein
Very plain, simple clothes. Think black straight jeans, black t-shirt, black Vans. Pein doesn’t have time to worry about fashion.
Konan: “Pein! I bought this for you!”
Pein: “.....it’s got more than one colour.”
Konan: “Yeah...and?”
Pein: “I don’t have time to coordinate colours, Konan.”
2. Konan
VERY into fashion, but her style can fluctuate between pretty flowery dresses to crop tops paired with bomber jackets. It really depends on her mood.
Konan: “Pein! Hurry up or we’re gonna be late!”
Pein: “Ripped jeans.....? Weren’t you wearing a pink dress about 10 minutes ago?”
Konan: “Yeah but then you decided to take forever to get ready which annoyed me.”
3. Deidara
As an “”Artist”” Deidara must obviously keep up with what’s in fashion. Very into cuffed jeans and oversized jackets. Occasionally borrows a crop top from Konan.
Pein: “Deidara please stop wearing Konan’s clothes. It’s weird.”
Deidara: “Weird?? What’s weird is YOU judging me about it!”
Pein: “Deidara the closet is starting to smell like your weird cologne please stop.”
4. Sasori
Sasori likes to dress casual but smart. A nice button up shirt. Checker prints take up most of his closet space. NEVER wears shorts, even in summer.
Deidara: “......It’s the middle of summer.”
Sasori: “Yeah.”
Deidara: “Like......almost 40 degrees Celsius.”
Sasori: “Yeah.”
Deidara: “How the fuck are you wearing long sleeves and pants?? You goddamn weirdo.”
Sasori: “I’ve grown completely accustomed to it. I no longer sweat.”
5. Hidan
PUNK. The word that pops into every passerby's head when they see Hidan. Leather jackets with a million pockets, giant black boots, chains everywhere, and at the back of his closet, that dumb coat with the fur hood.
Hidan: “The fuck are you looking at??”
Kakuzu: “A sheep, apparently.”
Hidan: “Fuck you Kakushit you don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
Kakuzu: “Maybe I could use one of the 7 chains on your pants to strangle you to death.”
6. Kakuzu
Kakuzu has no time for clothing genres. Usually can be seen in a plain button up shirt with slacks, or if he’s feeling daring, a polo shirt.
Hidan: “Holy shit.”
Hidan: “What the actual fuck are you.”
Kakuzu: “This is all I could find to wear.”
Hidan: “Like hell it is you dumb old fucking golf-playing looking asshole.”
Kakuzu: “Still pondering on those chains.”
7. Kisame
Gym junkie Kisame lives in board shorts and singlets. You will never see him in anything else, except for in winter when he wears massive comfy sweaters.
Konan: “Kisame...”
Kisame: “Yah Konan?”
Konan: “This sweater you let me borrow. You’re never getting it back. It’s the comfiest thing I think I’ve ever worn.”
Pein: “For the love of....now I have to put up with two different men’s cologne’s stinking out the closet.”
8. Itachi
Much like Pein, but more stylish. He’ll put his own flair on it. Like embroidering his initials on his shirt for some reason. Also like to wear a different hair tie each day.
Kisame: “I have a question Itachi.”
Itachi: “Go for it.”
Kisame: “Everyone knows your name. Everyone knows your first and last name. Why the need to show your initials on every shirt you own?”
Itachi: “In case Sasuke shows up and wonders if it’s actually me or not.”
Kisame: “......Oh Ok.”
9. Tobi/Obito
Tobi likes to wear COLOUR. He doesn’t even care if they don’t coordinate. Neon pink shirts with green jeans? Yeah sure why not. Obito likes to wear suspenders. He thinks he looks dapper in them.
Deidara: “Tobi you look bloody ridiculous.”
Tobi: “I’m expressing myself, Senpai! I think I look super cool!”
Deidara: “Hah, yeah, and I’m a shitty artist. Keep dreaming.”
Obito: “Can’t dream what’s already a reality, you half baked son of a-”
Deidara: “Eh? Did you say something?”
Tobi: “Nnnnnope!!”
10. Zetsu
Neither side can agree on what to wear. White Zetsu likes plain shirts while Black Zetsu likes graphic tees. The results are usually odd looking.
Pein: “I’m sorry, everyone. I’m trying to make this meeting sound formal.”
Pein: “But I keep getting distracted by Zetsu changing shirts every couple of minutes.”
White Zetsu: “I’m sorry! I don’t like swear words on my clothes!”
Black Zetsu: “Fucking pansy it’s COOL okay people will think we’re COOL.”
Hidan: “MORE SHIRTS WITH SWEAR WORDS ON THEM!”
Pein: “This is why I dress in all black, Konan.”
Hello! I am back from my very long much needed holiday (that I am already missing). It was such a relief taking time off from work and real life stuff that I was kinda sad to leave (still happy to be home though). Aaaaand straight into the Christmas retail period!
So! A few things to mention. I’ll list ‘em up to make this easier.
1) I got engaged while I was away! So I now have a wedding to plan! 2) We are meant to be receiving the keys to our new house this week! So I’ll be moving out of home soon! 3) We just had our Black Friday sale day (In Australia) and MY GOD was it insane. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a day that busy and hectic since Boxing Day. I cannot start to imagine what it’s like in America
SO due to the first two things I’ve been having a good long think about this blog and what to do with it. I’ve decided to revamp it! It’ll still of course be “Naruto Lists” as I’ll still be writing them. However due to the time it takes me to write them (and post them) I’m going to be adding another feature here which will take me less time to write and will give me something to post in-between lists.
Introducing Headcanons! The basic gist of it is that you guys ask me to write down my headcanons for something (relating to Naruto and it’s characters of course) and I’ll create a short paragraph about them for you.
Example: “Headcanons for Konoha 12 sleeping habits”
These lists will be much shorter than my current ones and therefore won’t take me as long to write. More content for you!
With that being said please give me a while to create the rules, revamp the page and officially announce I’m taking them. Thank you for your patience!
The Akatsuki as high school teachers
What teaching roles would the Akatsuki take on if they were forced to become high school teachers?
1. Pein
Teaches: History. His voice sends people to sleep.
Pein: “And in the Ancient Roman period the life expectancy was only 20 to 30 years. This has many contributing factors. Such as, but not limited to...”
Student: “Oh my god why won’t he talk faster.”
Pein: “No talking in my class. And don’t blaspheme my name like that.”
2. Konan
Teaches: Careers. She’s a little too motherly.
Konan: “And when you finish high school, you can go and do whatever you set your mind to.”
Student: “Can I become a chef?”
Konan: “Of course!”
Student #2: “Can I become a mob boss???”
Konan: “You can do whatever your heart tells you to hun.”
3. Itachi
Teaches: Computing and I.T. Well he tries at least.
Itachi: “Okay.....so today you’ll be using Photoshop to create a website design.”
Student: “You just opened up Microsoft Paint.”
Itachi: “Yes...I meant to do that.....give me a second.”
Student: “Can you even see the screen clearly?”
Itachi: “Honestly? No. I am going blind. Just do whatever.”
4. Kisame
Teaches: Gym. He has a pretty fierce rivalry with the other gym teacher.
Kisame: “Right! Let’s do some good old rope climbing today!”
Student: “Mr Gai had us do that yesterday.”
Kisame: “.....Right. Then we’ll be using the horse vault instead.”
Student: “Also yesterday. He said something about not remembering if there was another gym teacher or not so we just did everything.”
Kisame: “OH FOR FU-”
5. Hidan
Teaches: Religion. Even though he’s just a substitute.
Hidan: “And THAT is why you should hail Lord Jashin as your saviour.”
Student: “Mr Hidan this is an English Literature class.”
Hidan: “Do I give a fuck? No. Shut the fuck up.”
6. Kakuzu
Teaches: Economics. Yes it’s as terrible as you think.
Kakuzu: “Setting up an interest account will not only teach you to save money but will also earn you even MORE money in the long run.”
Student: “Thanks for the advice! But the exam is about taxes so I really think we should be-”
Kakuzu: “Taxes are the devil. I will have no part in teaching it. If you fail then that’s your own problem”
7. Deidara
Teaches: Art. As a substitute. He hates being the substitute.
Deidara: “Alright kiddos get out your clay we’re gonna be making SCULPTURES.”
Student: “But Mr Sasori has been teaching us still life painting so shouldn’t we be continuing that?”
Deidara: “Ha ha, Mr Sasori can suck a dick because he’s an idiot. I said get out your clay.”
8. Sasori
Teaches: Art.
Sasori: “Sorry I was away. I had a nasty head cold and- what the hell are those?”
Student: “Um.....Mr Deidara told us to make clay sculptures yesterday and it was actually really fun! We’re hoping we can finish-”
Sasori: “Throw those hideous things in the trash where they belong.”
9. Tobi/Obito
Teaches: Drama. As two different “brothers”.
Tobi: “Okay! Let’s practise our facial expressions now! Pull the stupidest face you can and your partner has to try not to laugh! Then we’re gonna practise ANIMAL NOISES!”
Student: “Holy shit Mr Uchiha’s brother is on some sort of drug or something.”
Tobi: “What did you say about my brother?? That he’s super handsome?? Yeah I know!”
10. Zetsu
Teaches: Biology. Things tend to go missing.
Zetsu: “Okay. Today we are dissecting frogs.”
Student: “Ewww....cool! Where are they?”
Zetsu: “I.....didn’t eat them. I swear.”
Student: “.....oh.”
Follow my Japan holiday Instagram! Also news about my absence and stuff.
Hey guys!
I’ve been absent for a bit because of life. Just work, getting ready to move, preparing for my holiday etc. Real life sucks sometimes! Adulting is hard.
In saying that, I’ll be going on holiday for 5 weeks as of Sunday. I’ve managed to whip up one list that’ll be posted on Monday evening but unfortunately that’s all I have had time to do. It’s a pretty long list though and I quite enjoyed writing it so! Hopefully you guys like it too, and hopefully it’s enough to satiate you until my return.
Fear not though! I’m not abandoning the blog. I guess it’s called a Hiatus? I’ll be back in the middle of November and back to writing lists whenever I have the time. Obviously once I get back I’ll be moving out and working during the Christmas period so I’ll have to create some sort of schedule. I’m sure I’ll be able to do it, I’m good at that organising stuff. Most of the time.
If anyone is interested I’ll be posting photos of my holiday -->HERE<-- on Instagram so feel free to follow me there! Proof that I’m not dead and am actually going away ahaha. I’ll be posting a bit of anime/video game stuff on there INCLUDING Naruto of course so it’s relevant to this blog!
Hope you all have a great October!
~ MH
If different Naruto characters had their own anime
Requested by maxinesheela!
If characters other than Naruto had a show named after them, taken directly from each characters own ideas, what would they be like?
1. Sasuke
Oh man. Ooooh man. This one is definitely classified as a drama. It’s very dark. Very brooding. Very popular with teenage boys. An orphan sets out to avenge his clan. Along the way he meets a lot of people who just don’t GET him.
The villain turns out to be his older brother who’s actually not a villain. Massive plot twist. More brooding.
Rated: MA
Rating: 6.5/10
2. Killer Bee
An anime about an aspiring musician who travels the world looking for inspiration. The entire anime would be spoken in rhyme. Even the narration. For April Fools day they released an episode with normal speech.
It’s more popular than you would think.
Rated: M
Rating: 7/10
3. Hidan
There is no plot. None. Every episode is just brutal slaughter, gore, and profanity. There was a 15 minute scene in episode 5 about how vegetables aren’t actually good for you.
After episode 7 it got cancelled.
Rated: R-18
Rating: 3/10
4. Kiba
“Hi my name’s Kiba and welcome to DOG WORLD.” The show is actually just about dogs. It’s not even remotely centred on Kiba at all. It’s more of a documentary. Most of it is just him filming Akamaru in his day to day life with dog facts being spoken at the same time.
Actually.....very popular.
Rated: G
Rating: 9/10
5. Itachi
Surprisingly light-hearted. A deeper look into the life of an undercover villain. It’s not just mindless killing. He showcases his friendship with Kisame a lot and mentions it’s not nice to judge people based on appearance. It gets kinda emotional when he talks about the fact he’s going blind and is going to miss seeing his partner every day.
There’s a whole arc dedicated to Sasuke.
Rated: M
Rating: 8/10
6. Pein
A LOT of “Pein/Pain” puns. Every episode a different Path of Pain is the centre character. Seems more like a dumb sitcom than an actual good show.
The first two episodes were kinda okay but it got old after the hundredth “I am god” line. Especially since the dialogue was mostly monotone. It just wasn’t....good. The ratings were the highest when Konan was in an episode.
Rated: PG
Rating: 2/10
7. Gaara
Secret life of a Kazekage! What does he really get up to? The answer? Cacti.
Gaara has a massive cacti collection that he LOVES to showcase. The directors keep trying to direct the show back to his actual day to day life but he always manages to sneak in some cacti somewhere. It became a good pastime to watch episodes and try to find the hidden cacti in camera shots.
Rated: G
Rating: 6/10
8. Kakuzu
The most boring show you will ever watch. Honestly. It’s amazing how it even got onto the air.
Literally an accounting show. How to balance a check book. How to count stacks of money efficiently. There is no music. Just him, in a chair, talking. It’s popular with rich old men but that’s about it.
Rated: M
Rating: 5/10
9. Rock Lee
The most intense work out show you will ever watch. It’s VERY popular with women who want to get fit. The ratings are always incredibly high. The only common complaint is the fact that all members of this show look exactly the same. It’s a little unnerving.
Rated: PG
Rating: 9/10
10. Zetsu
An incredibly weird show that’s only enjoyed by a select few people. On one hand we have some gardening tips, how to grow certain plants properly with the correct care.....and on the other hand we have “how to eat bones without splintering them.” This one doesn’t even have a genre.
It is it’s own genre.
Rated: MA...?
Rating: 4/10
The Akatsuki meet their S/O’s parents for the first time
Requested by anon!
How would the parents of each Akatsuki’s S/O react the first time they meet?
1. Pein
S/O “Mum, dad! This is my boyfriend!”
Parent: “Oh uh....hello.”
Pein: “Do my facial piercings make you nervous? There is no need; they are harmless. Usually.”
S/O: “Isn’t he funny!?”
Parent: “......sure.”
2. Konan
S/O: “Parents. This is my girlfriend.”
S/O: “She is very pretty so please like her.”
Konan “Don’t worry I show a lot more emotion than he does~”
Parent: “Oh thank god.”
Pein: “You’re welcome.”
3. Deidara
S/O: “Mum, this is my boyfriend! He’s an artist!”
Parent: “An artist huh? What kind of art?”
Deidara: “I like um....art of the...large hands on side of things.”
Parent: “Oh? Like sculpting stuff?”
Deidara: “Yeees....?”
S/O: “Deidara likes to set things on fire!”
Parent: “.......what?”
Deidara: “It’s ART dammit!!”
4. Sasori
Parent: “Can I....help you?
Sasori: “I apologise for coming onto your property uninvited. My name is Sasori and I am dating your child now.”
Parent: “......”
Sasori: “I just wanted to assure you there is no need for concern. Every part of my body is artificially made. I will look after them just as well as I look after myself.”
Parent: “I’m....going to call the police if you don’t leave.”
5. Hidan
Parent: “Hello?”
Hidan: “Yeah hi. Just wanted to let you know your spawn is dead.”
Parent: “W-What??”
Hidan: “I mean they were a great sacrifice substitute but I mean kinda shitty at the same time because it was nothing special in the end.”
Parent: “Are you telling me you KILLED my child????”
Hidan: “Technically they killed themselves by showing interest in a follower of Jashin but sure we can put it that way.”
6. Kakuzu
S/O: “Dad, this is Kakuzu. We’re dating!”
Parent: “Dating?? How old is this man??”
Kakuzu: “Excuse you that is a very rude first impression.”
Parent: “Sorry.....I’m just a little shocked.”
S/O: “It’s fine dad! He asked me out so sweetly! Asked me if I’d give him my heart!”
Kakuzu: “We’re still on for doing that tonight right?”
7. Itachi
Parent: “Honey who is this?”
S/O: “This is Itachi! He’s my ....well, new boyfriend I guess!”
Parent: “You guess..?”
S/O: “Well he’s uh....blind? And he kind of stumbled into me and mistook me for someone else so....surprise!”
Itachi: “Are you talking to Kisame?? I’ve been looking for him everywhere!.”
Parent: “Oh dear.”
8. Kisame
Parent: “HOLY SHIT.”
Parent: “I mean uh....sweetie who is this??”
S/O: “This is Kisame mum. He’s my boyfriend.”
Parent: “Honey you are dating a SHARK.”
Kisame: “Half shark actually. On my mothers side. She told me never to judge anyone based on their appearance....as a side note.”
Parent: “That’s a....good lesson to teach.”
9. Tobi
Tobi: “Hi! I’m Tobi! I’m dating your-”
Parent: “Who is this lost child, S/O?”
S/O: “His name is Tobi. I’m going to be dating him from now on~”
Tobi: “Don’t worry! Tobi will look after them and treat them well and buy them stuffed toys and chocolate!”
Parent: “He’s......a bit....”
S/O: “Oh don’t worry, he has a very serious side as well!”
10. Zetsu
White Zetsu: “Why did you have to do that???”
Black Zetsu: “Look I’m sorry okay? I just got kind of hungry and-”
White Zetsu: “You ATE both our S/O AND their parents!! Now we’re alone...again.”
Black Zetsu: “We have each other.”
White Zetsu: “Hooray.”
Hello friends! I realise I have been quiet again. But there is a good reason! You see my partner and I have been building our own house this year! And in the past month all the walls and concrete have been going up so we’ve been busy buying furniture and planning everything for it. It’s incredibly stressful （・□・；）
I also recently got put up to fully full time hours this month at work as well! Which means I get two days of the week off; and one of them goes towards planning house stuff. The other I generally spend cleaning and playing video games to try and wind down ╰(⇀‸↼)╯
I promise I’ll try and get back into the swing of things again. I plan to make a fairly large queue for the month of October as I’ll be going overseas for 5 weeks during this time, so I’ve gotta get back into writing so I’m able to do that ahaha.
As a side note, this is what it feels like whenever I open up this blog. Sorry guys! Real life unfortunately gets in the way sometimes.
Look forward to some new lists soon! They are priority on my to do list tomorrow so hopefully I can smash out 2 or 3 in one go. Have a great weekend guys!
-Mod Hidan x
Naruto is rumoured to be dead!
Requested by thescretblogger!
How would various characters react if they found out that Naruto was supposedly dead? This will be set before the war.
1. Orochimaru
Orochimaru: “.....”
Orochimaru: “Well now we have to rename the show.”
Orochimaru: “I highly suggest it be called “Sasuke” instead!”
2. Sasuke
Sasuke: “......I kind of feel like my whole defecting from the village thing was for nothing now.”
Orochimaru: “No no this is good! Now the show can focus on you more!”
Sasuke: “Ehhh.....I don’t feel like it.”
3. Sakura
Sakura: “What no.”
Sakura: “No he can’t be dead.”
Sakura: “Naruto you get your sorry ass up from that coffin RIGHT NOW.”
Sakura: “.....please.”
4. Kakashi
Kakashi: “Well shit. There goes any hope we had of beating the Akatsuki.”
Kiba: “Hey! That’s a little insensitive to the rest of us don’t you think?
Kakashi: “Kiba the show is literally named after him. We have no chance.”
5. Hinata
Hinata: “.....”
Hinata: “Naruto.....it can’t be true...”
Hinata: “I never got a chance to confess! Now I’ll be tormented by it for the rest of my life....I can’t do this anymore. I’m out.”
6. Minato
Minato: “He can’t be dead!”
Minato: “If he was dead...he’d be here with us! Right Kushina?”
Kushina: “......”
Minato: “.....R-Right?”
7. Shikamaru
Shikamaru: “Well....that’s it. I give up on life.”
Shikamaru: “I really wanted him to become the Hokage. I was going to make it my life goal.”
Shikamaru: “And now this. I think I’m going to go sleep for a few days.”
8. Iruka
Iruka: “......”
Iruka: “I’m sorry. I won’t believe it. Not until I physically see a body.”
Kakashi: “Iruka....he was-”
Iruka: “SHOW ME THE BODY, KAKASHI.”
9. Kakuzu
Kakuzu: “Yes....I would also like to see....the body....for reasons.”
Iruka: “Either you turn your ass around RIGHT now or I will shove your disgusting tentacle-y fist right up your-”
Kakuzu: “Yeah alright I got it my bad geez.”
10. Pein
Pein: “Good. I was getting sick of this insect beating all of my men.”
Kisame: “He didn’t beat me!”
Deidara: “Or....me....”
Sasori: “I was beaten by Sakura. And my grandma”
Hidan: “FUCK YOU PEIN GET ME OUT OF HERE.”
Pein: “Yes....it was all... Naruto’s fault.”
Neji babysits Boruto and Himawari!
Requested by anon!
In an alternate universe Neji survived the war. And now he’s been asked to babysit Naruto and Hinata’s kids for one reason or another. What would happen??
1. Neji would immediately regret it. Just like the last time. And the time before that.
Naruto: “Thanks again Neji! You guys be good!”
Boruto: “Okay, dad!”
Neji: “So! What do you guys want to do today?”
Boruto: “MUM AND DAD ARE GONE THE HOUSE IS NOW MINE.”
Neji: “BORUTO NO.”
2. He would constantly praise Himawari’s byakugan skills, though.
Every time he babysits them her skills seem to get better. She loves the attention. Boruto gets jealous.
Neji: “You’re getting so good at it, Himawari!”
Boruto: “HEY UNCLE NEJI WATCH ME RUN THROUGH THIS WALL.”
Neji: “BORUTO. NO.”
3. There is yelling. Lots and lots of yelling.
Usually about mess in the playroom. And mess in the bedroom....and in the kitchen.
Neji: “BORUTO STOP THROWING YOUR TOYS EVERYWHERE.”
Neji: “HIMAWARI STOP COPYING HIM.”
Boruto: “YOU’RE NOT OUR DAD! YOU CAN’T TELL US WHAT TO DO!”
Neji: “BORUTO SO HELP ME.”
4. Dinner is always a struggle.
Neji: “I’m going to cook us some katsudon for dinner!”
Himawari: “I love katsudon!”
Boruto: “I don’t want it. I want to have cake for dinner instead!”
Himawari: “I love cake more! Cake for dinner!”
Neji: “N O.”
5. Boruto always ends up missing for an hour or two.
Neji tries to use his byakugan....but....
Himawari: “Byakugan is cheating Uncle Neji!!”
Neji: “But-”
Himawari: “Boruto is playing hide and seek! You can’t cheat!”
Neji: “.......fine.”
He usually ends up in the laundry cupboard.
6. Finger painting is both Neji’s most favourite and least favourite activity.
Neji: “You guys are doing so well! We’ll hang these on the wall after they dry.”
Boruto: “Why hang them on the wall....when they can BE the wall??”
Neji: “Haha that’s....wait, what?”
Boruto: “HIMAWARI LET’S PAINT THE WALL.”
Neji: “B O R U T O .... N O.”
7. Himawari always demands a bedtime story.
The story about the princess and the frog is her favourite.
Neji: “Okay, what book did you want me to read?”
Himawari: “This one!”
Neji: “But....I read this one to you last time! And the time before that!”
Himawari: “I want THIS one!!”
Neji: “......okay.”
8. Neji finally gets some peace after he’s put them to bed....for 10 minutes.
He collapses on the couch. Closes his eyes. Bliss. It doesn’t last long.
Neji: “Finally....I can rest for a bit...”
....
Boruto: “LET’S GET PIZZA.”
Neji: “Why must I suffer.”
9. More yelling.
Neji: “YOU ARE NOT HAVING PIZZA AT THIS TIME OF NIGHT.”
Neji: “I DON’T CARE IF YOU’RE HUNGRY. YOU’VE BRUSHED YOUR TEETH.”
Neji: “NO DON’T EAT THE TOOTHPASTE.”
10. In the end they always end up falling asleep on the couch together.
Naruto and Hinata arrive home blissfully unaware of anything that has happened.
Hinata: “Aww look at that! I don’t want to wake them!”
Naruto: “They get along so well. Let’s ask Neji to babysit more often!”
Konoha men find out their wives are pregnant!
Requested by x-chick303!
How would particular men of Konoha react when their wives tell them they’re pregnant?
1. Naruto
Would freak the hell out.
Naruto would start worrying about EVERYTHING. Is Hinata feeling okay?? What colour clothes would the baby prefer?? Should he paint the room THIS shade of orange or this SLIGHTLY DARKER shade of orange?
Hinata: “Naruto, I’m pregnant again!”
Naruto: “WHAT NO NOW I GOTTA PICK ANOTHER PAINT COLOUR. I mean.....that’s amazing news Honey!!”
2. Minato
Would take a while to react.
When Kushina first tells him it just kind of....goes over his head. He’ll continue to eat his eggs on toast and read the paper in a casual manner. And then when he finally realises....
Kushina: “Minato....I’m um....I’m pregnant!”
Minato: “Oh yeah! Cool!”
Kushina: “......”
Minato: “......”
Minato: “So how did you slee- OH MY GOD WAIT WHAT WE’RE HAVING A BABY???”
3. Sasuke
Would act calm but on the inside he’s freaking out.
It’s Sasuke. He’s going to act calm and aloof and completely and utterly fine with it. Good thing Sakura can’t read minds.
Sakura: “Honey, I’m pregnant!”
Sasuke: “Pregnant? Well that’s.....wonderful news. We’ll finally have a family together. I’m very happy, Sakura.”
Inner Sasuke: “HOW DO YOU CHANGE A DIAPER??? WHATEVER I’LL JUST GO ON ANOTHER TRIP.”
4. Shikamaru
Would think it’s a joke at first.
I mean.....Shikamaru is super lazy. Looking after a kid means not being lazy anymore. Thinking it’s a joke is like a defence mechanism.
Temari: “Oh yeah, by the way. I’m 4 weeks pregnant.”
Shikamaru: “Pregnant? Haha....that’s a good one. I didn’t realise you were such the joker.”
Temari: “I’m not joking you dumb idiot. We’re having a child.”
Shikamaru: “.....Oh......really? I mean that’s GREAT!! Don’t look at me like that!”
5. Sai
Wouldn’t fully understand for a while.
Sai’s never really had any interaction with young children. It would take him a while to understand that HE’S going to have one.
Sai: “So.....tell me again?”
Ino: “We’re having a baby Sai. I’m pregnant with your baby. A child. A kid. A tiny you.”
Sai: “A tiny me.....and it’ll know I’m the dad?”
Ino: “YES, the baby will know you’re the dad. You’re so annoyingly adorable when you’re clueless.”
6. Chouji
Would be overjoyed.
Chouji would start preparing straight away. Getting the room ready, making sure Karui has all the strange food cravings she wants....planning what the child will eat.
Karui: “Are you SURE you don’t think me eating watermelon covered in Nutella is weird?”
Chouji: “Darling we’ve all tried that combination once in our life. And if you have it now then that means the baby will like it in the future too!”
Karui: “I don’t think that’s something I want our baby eating.”
7. Asuma
Would bawl his eyes out.
As soon as Kurenai told him, Asuma just kind of....burst into tears. He didn’t even mean it. He doesn’t know why. But he can’t stop. Good thing it was in private.
Kurenai: “Dear do you need another box of tissues?”
Asuma: “N-No it’s just....s-so....so amazing I mean I can’t believe we’re going to be parents??? I just can’t....I mean...”
Kurenai: “Shhhhh just keep it up with the tissues.”
Konoha 11′s Instagram Feeds (+Sasuke & Sai)
Requested by anon!
I’ve previously touched on the Akatsuki’s Instagram Feeds. Now what would the Konoha 11′s look like? Plus Sasuke and Sai of course! This will be post war!
1. Naruto
Very lifestyle oriented. Photos of his friends, the scenery around Konoha and of the food he eats. Every second photo is probably of ramen. His most liked photo is of Kurama attempting to eat a normal sized bowl of ramen. He still can’t figure out why.
Currently has: 7100 Followers
2. Sakura
Sakura posts her training regime. She posts a full body shot in the mirror every day to track her progress. Many people have said they inspire her. The words “beautiful strong woman” have been posted a few times in her comments. She also likes to make call out posts about gross commenters.
Currently has: 101k Followers
3. Kiba
Literally just photos of Akamaru. His instagram name and bio are him pretending to be Akamaru. He is very popular.
Currently has: 500k Followers.
4. Hinata
Hinata doesn’t post much. She posts even less of herself. Her photos are more of her cooking, or the sunset over Hokage Rock. She always comments on Naruto’s photos with a single emoji. Sometimes two if she’s feeling daring.
Currently has: 300 Followers
5. Shino
Shino has only posted a grand total of 4 photos. All of them are close ups of his bugs. He received a few nasty comments and decided to give up.
Currently has: 10 Followers
6. Shikamaru
Obviously being too lazy to post often, Shikamaru doesn’t have any sort of posting schedule. It could be days between photos or it could be weeks. A few of them are of food. A couple of shadow art. One is of Temari. That’s his most liked.
Currently has: 280 Followers.
7. Chouji
Quite obviously a food poster. Except he’s a massive spammer. He posts multiple photos within an hour; each of the same food dish but at different angles. His followers keep fluctuating because people get sick of the spam.
Currently has: 4900 Followers.
8. Ino
Enjoys showing off her flower arrangements. It’s a great way to promote the business. And it worked. She’s had a few people from different lands travel all the way to Konoha just to visit her shop.
Currently has: 200k Followers
9. Neji
Obviously hasn’t posted in a while. His last photo uploaded was of him and Lee post workout. Lee forced him to post it. He’s screen-shotted and saved it to his camera roll.
Currently has: 28 Followers.
10. Rock Lee
Hardly posts photos; instead he posts videos of himself working out. You can often hear Gai yelling encouragement in the background. He’s surprisingly quite popular with all the other workout blogs.
Currently has: 8000 Followers
11. TenTen
Enjoys uploading close up photos of her menagerie of weapons. She explains the background and history of each on each photo she posts. It’s oddly quite aesthetically pleasing.
Currently has: 9600 Followers.
12. Sai
His instagram is actually quite....well, artistic. He posts his artwork; but arranges it in such a way that each photo looks like it flows into the other while you scroll through his page. Quite beautiful to look at. Ino is very proud of him.
Currently has: 90k Followers.
13. Sasuke
Posts scenery from his travels. Instead of a caption he comments with an emoji to match whatever he’s posted. He doesn’t admit it, but he secretly does it so he can show Sakura where he is at the time. He doesn’t want her to worry. Naruto comments “WHEN ARE YOU BACK??” on every photo, though.
Currently has: 7000 Followers.
Konoha 11 (+ Sasuke and Sai) run for Hokage
Requested by anon!
What reasons would the Konoha 11, Sasuke and Sai have if they ran for Hokage? Naruto will not be included but he will be commenting!
1. Sakura
Sakura: “I guess I’d say to prove that a woman can be in power....but Tsunade-sama already did that.”
Sakura: “So maybe to prove that TWO women can be in power!”
Naruto: “Honestly that sounds kind of scary.”
Sakura: “Shut up!”
2. Shikamaru
Shikamaru: “Honestly running for Hokage sounds like so...so much work.”
Shikamaru: “But I mean if I HAD to run....to approve more public holidays off maybe?”
Shikamaru: “Maybe I’d ban paperwork and just have everyone play Shogi.”
Naruto: “Maybe just stick to helping me become it.”
3. Chouji
Chouji: “Oh! I’d definitely introduce a food festival!”
Chouji: “Yeah...a festival specifically celebrating all kinds of food around the world.”
Chouji: “Of course, the Hokage would be able to try everything at this festival for free. Obviously.”
Naruto: “That’s just an excuse for you to get free food!”
4. Ino
Ino: “I’ve never really had the goal of becoming Hokage. I think it’d be boring.”
Ino: “But if I did.....I’d get to tell everyone what to do right?”
Ino: “I wouldn’t want to wear that ugly hat though...hm. Dilemmas.”
Naruto: “Your dilemma is literally over whether you would want to wear a hat or not? I don’t think the hat matters too much in the bigger picture!”
5. Kiba
Kiba: “OBVIOUSLY so that I can make a national holiday for dogs!”
Kiba: “All the dogs in Konoha need to be thanked for all their hard work.”
Naruto: “Akamaru just vomited on my shoes.”
Kiba: “ALL their hard work.”
6. Hinata
Hinata: “Oh I wouldn’t run for Hokage ever! I couldn’t! Even if you bribed me!”
Hinata: “That’s Naruto’s dream and I wouldn’t want to damage that in any way!”
Naruto: “Aw Hinata that’s so sweet! The kind of answer I like to hear!”
7. Shino
Shino: “Running for Hokage? Maybe people would notice me for once.”
Shino: “I’d force people to appreciate the beauty of insects.”
Naruto: “Please never run for Hokage.”
Shino: “Your words hurt me more than any weapon ever could.”
8. Rock Lee
Rock Lee: “HA! If I became Hokage no one would be able to keep up!”
Rock Lee: “I think I’d like to introduce more sports festivals...marathons...boot camps!”
Rock Lee: “Can you image if the whole village trained all at once??”
Naruto: “You’re tiring me out and I’m not even doing anything.”
9. Neji
Neji: “I’d run things smoothly.”
Neji: “Not that I could ever been Hokage.”
Neji: “You know. That curse I have. Kind of ruins every chance I’ve got.”
Naruto: “.....Yeah I’m going to get rid of that curse once I become Hokage.”
10. TenTen
TenTen: “I think I’d make a great Hokage!”
TenTen: “I don’t have any weird reasons for it. Just think I’d be a great leader!”
Naruto: “That’s surprisingly accurate......I kind of see it as a threat.”
TenTen: “Maybe you should!”
11. Sai
Sai: “I’m still not that great at conveying emotions perfectly...but as a Hokage it wouldn’t really matter.”
Sai: “If something terrible happened I’d be able to handle it calmly. I think I’d be fine! Do you not agree, Naruto?”
Naruto: “Sai we’ve talked about this whole touching when we’re talking thing.”
Sai: “Sorry! Just getting into the moment!”
12. Sasuke
Sasuke: “One word.”
Sasuke: “Revolution.”
Naruto: “.......”
Naruto: “Yeah no that’s not going to go down well.”
Sasuke: “You’ll see.”
Naruto: “NO ONE WILL VOTE FOR YOU.”
Naruto has gotten amnesia!
Requested by anon!
Naruto hit his head too hard one day and got amnesia as a result. What do various characters tell him to try and help??
1. Sakura
Sakura: “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
Sakura: “It’s okay guys I’ve got this. This one is easy.”
Sakura: “Naruto.....remember how we got Sasuke back?”
Naruto: “Who the hell is Sasuke?”
Sakura: “Oh god it’s hopeless.”
2. Kakashi
Kakashi: “C’mon Naruto, snap out of it. You’re upsetting Kurama.”
Naruto: “Ku...rama? What are you talking about?”
Kakashi: “You know. The demon fox inside you.”
Naruto: “The WHAT inside of me?? WHAT DEMON FOX? THERE’S A DEMON INSIDE ME??”
Kurama: “Maybe not the best idea.”
3. Gaara
Gaara: “Oh....this isn’t very preferable now is it.”
Gaara: “I can’t lose Naruto as a friend. Naruto, look me in the eyes and tell me you remember everything we’ve been through.”
Naruto: “You.....have very bad dark circles. Maybe you should get some more sleep?”
Temari: “Gaara no don’t cry please it’s okay it’s fine!”
4. Kurama
Kurama: “Look Naruto, this is probably gonna freak you out but you’ve got to listen to me.”
Kurama: “You are a Jinchuuriki. That means you have a tailed beast inside you. I am the tailed beast. I’m a Kyuubi.”
Naruto: *Incoherent screaming* “GET OUT OF ME.”
Kurama: “NO STOP BEING A BABY.”
5. Hinata
Hinata: “H-He’s lost his memory?? Of everything??”
Hinata: “Naruto please don’t tell me you’ve forgotten me! We’re getting married in a few months!”
Naruto: “Well I mean.....I don’t know who you are but I wouldn’t mind marrying someone as pretty as you!”
Hinata: “I...I....I don’t know how to respond to that!”
6. Konohamaru
Konohamaru: “Waaah? You’ve lost your memory??”
Konohamaru: “But....but surely you couldn’t have forgotten the most important jutsu of all!?”
Naruto: “Which....would be...?”
Konohamaru: “Your sexy jutsu!!”
Naruto: “My wha-? That sounds stupid.”
Konohamaru: “BLASPHEMER!”
7. Sasuke
Sasuke: “Ridiculous. There is no possible way he could of forgotten every damn thing over the past few years.”
Sasuke: “Naruto, if you don’t snap out of it I’m going to ram this chidori into your chest. Got that?”
Naruto: “Your.....your fist is filled with lightning!”
Sasuke: “Ten seconds and counting.”
8. Tsunade
Tsunade: “Brat. Do you want to be Hokage or not?”
Naruto: “What’s a Hokage?”
Tsunade: “It’s what YOU’VE wanted to be your whole goddamn life! You idiot! Now stop acting like a fool!”
Naruto: “I’m sorry maam but your chest is distracting me.”
Tsunade: “Sakura baby hold me back ‘cause I’m about to punch this sucker into next week.”
9. Iruka
Iruka: “Guys, guys! I’ve got this! Just let me handle it.”
Iruka: “Naruto; come with me.”
Naruto: “Where are we going, stranger I’ve never met until now?”
Iruka: “You’ll see.”
10. Ichiraku Ramen Guy
Ichiraku Ramen Guy: “Naruto! The usual I assume?”
Iruka: “He’s lost his memory. Can you restore it?”
Ichiraku Ramen Guy: “One large miso ramen with extra pork coming up!”
Naruto: “This is....amazing! It’s almost like....oh my god, Iruka Sensei? What happened??”
Iruka: “You’re the hero we’ve always needed, Teuchi.”
Memories
The final prize for danceofthebloodypetals as part of my follower giveaway. They requested a short written prompt of Naruto looking back to his past and feeling grateful. Hope you enjoy!