Sometimes l'm late because I sit like this for a long time

i had a dream that time travel was invented and too many people choose to travel back in time to save the titanic from sinking (the question of whether unsinking of the titanic deserved so much attention in the face of human history was the subject of both heavy academic and online discourse), which caused a rift in the space-time-continuum that led to the titanic showing up indiscriminately all over the world’s oceans and sea in various states of sinking.

this caused a lot of issues both in terms of fixing said space-time-continuum and in terms of nautical navigation, and after a long and heavy battle in the international maritime organization it was decided that the bureaucratic burden of dealing with this was to be upon Ireland, much to their dismay. the Irish Government then released an app for all sailors and seafarers so they could report titanic sightings during their journeys, even though they heavily dissuaded you from reporting them given the paperwork it caused.

anyway i woke up with a clear image of the app in my head and needed to recreate it for all of you:

no you don't understand. i do international regulation of emerging technologies for a living. this WAS me stress dreaming about work

himbo this, bimbo that. in my day there was mambo, and there were five of them.

kitten i'll be honest daddy isn't sure he's cut out for full time employment

the father the son and the holy spirit

approaching the wip carefully from the side like a skittish animal. speaking in a low, gentle voice so it doesn’t run away

i always think abt my cousin in greece who's like obsessed with american culture, bc ill say that im going to a barbecue and she'll be like "wow.... a real life american barbecue... will there be red cups?" you bet your ass there'll be red cups. take my hand. have a hot dog. all your dreams can come true here at the real life american barbecue

Inspired by my coworkers being baffled at me getting up 2 and a half hours before I come in despite living 20 mins away

(Add reasons why you do or don't get up early in the tags if ya want)

can't say enough positive things about the humble square bracket in a writing draft. [place name] [adjective] [description of x] you have saved me from staring at a poorly crafted sentence for hours more times than you could ever know,

im developing cataracts in my right eye and ill be getting surgery for it on sunday so art might be paused for a bit next week ...

to help OP out for each day it is healing I will invent a new minion hybrid.

day 1: if a minion and shrek had sex that produced viable offspring

that's okay. you dont need to do that actually

I can’t believe they’re making me do my degree I signed up for

love it when a nondog baby animal is called a pup anyway

hi dogys

wuppies ☝️

Every time I see the S4 TUA image on the Netflix idle screen I take psychic damage and have war flashbacks to August 8th

anon please respond i need to know more we can have our enemies to lovers arc