Wish me luck, I’m going to try ask my therapist today to stop dismissing my autism symptoms because it “doesn’t actually matter if I’m autistic”

My family gatherings are just an hour straight of me wondering how these people aren’t diagnosed. Doctors ask me do you have history of neurodivergence and mental illness in your family? How the fuck do I say that my family are all 100% neurodivergent but they think psychologists and vaccines will turn you into a robot or some shit. People act surprised when I list of all my diagnosis, I promise you this did not come from nowhere. My family has a very long treaty with the ‘tism.

TW meltdown, self harm (kind of), vent

I think I had an autistic meltdown the other day, I was being screamed at so I kind of ended up on the floor repeatedly rocking back and forth, completely nonverbal and hitting myself repeatedly. It did not feel the same as a tic. My therapist doesn’t want to look into an autism diagnosis for me because she thinks it doesn’t matter, but I don’t know I kind of feel like if I’m going nonverbal it does sort of matter? She also said she “doesn’t believe in autistic burnout”

To the people who see someone with a mobility aid or other accessibility tool and think they can tell if the persons faking, please shut the fuck up. Often these people’s “LOOK THEYRE FAKING” moment is when they see something such a wheelchair stand up or move their leg, they see someone with a cane not using it for a moment or holding it, a deaf person who can speak, a blind person whose eyes don’t “look” blind, someone with a service dog who is not visibly disabled.

The truth is you can’t tell if someone’s faking needing a mobility aid or tool by looking at them, how can you when you don’t know what they use it for?

With my cane some days I rely on it heavily, I use it for every step and cannot walk without it. Some days my body is fully paralysed, numb, weak, fatigued and in pain. However some days I can run and jump and walk just fine. Whenever I’m in public I bring my cane with me for safety, in case I have a sudden issue. If you see me carrying my cane and not using it, that doesn’t mean that I’m faking. If I’m walking through a narrow space and I pick up my cane, that doesn’t mean that I don’t actually need it.

Same goes for any other disability. Tics manifest in different ways, not seeing me tic for a while doesn’t mean I’m faking it. I have tics and not even I could tell if someone’s tics are fake. If I can’t tell then you, a person who knows very little about tics most definitely cannot.

Perhaps you meet autistic person who enjoys social settings or makes eye contact, a person with adhd that seems like they have everything under control, someone with depression who looks “fine”, a person with any neurodivergence who doesn’t act like your mums friends sisters brothers sons hamsters beauticians gynaecologists nephew who also has said diagnosis.

Disabilities affect people in unique ways, you cannot know someone’s experiences and medical history just by looking at them.

Fake claiming is ableism disguised as disability advocacy.

I made a bingo chart, if I'm going to be harassed and not treated as a person I might as well get some amusement out of it!! feel free to join in!

You know those teachers who would have posters in their classrooms like “weird is a superpower” and “in a world where you can be anything, be kind” then would proceed to scream at a neurodivergent child until they cried.

To disabled people: what is the ableist language you encounter most in your life?

• For me the word “special” has always sort of been a thing that people have used to imply insult towards me and others. I’ve also found it particularly demeaning. People often do not respond well to being asked to no longer use such terms.

• For my cane I am frequently called old and compared to an elderly person.

• The word cripple is used startlingly often in conversation. Many people do not realise this is a slur and something to be avoided. As well as handicapped, differently abled and similar words.

• Additionally the use of “super power” when describing disability is one that is “socially acceptable” enough to not be called out, therefore is disturbingly rampant.

• Most often I am called autistic as an insult, people in my generation from my observations will lean towards this option as well as frequent use of the r slur.

(This post is made for disabled people to share their experiences as well as to educate others on outdated ableist language)

Ah yes, when you’re neurodivergent and you go to your friends to figure out what the fuck just happened in a recent social interaction but they’re also neurodivergent so you either leave with a wildly wrong interpretation or you just stare at each other 0-0

So I was diagnosed with “high functioning autism” in the span of two minutes by a psychiatrist (I think that terms a little dated). He asked me a few questions then told me I was autistic. Obviously you’re not supposed to do that. An autism diagnosis should take more time.

I’m confused myself now, I have symptoms of autism but there are also things I lack.

As a child I struggled with social cues and had sensory issues, I was ahead in reading however far behind in other developmental areas.

As of now I don’t really think I’m autistic? I have this sort of algorithm thing I apply to social situations so most of the time I know what people are feeling just not what they’re trying to say. Often I do misinterpret things, miss the punchline of jokes and not notice when people are attempting to be nasty. Usually I have to repeat social interactions to others to figure out what was going on. I think it’s like this for most people though? I don’t know I’m very confused. My therapist doesn’t see any need to look into the diagnosis further saying that it’s just giftedness and general neurodivergence, doesn’t really matter whether I’m autistic or not, etc.

People often assume I am autistic and I do have some symptoms. I’m just very confused as of now. Perhaps I should just leave things where they are and forget about this.

Everyone always assumes I’m on drugs but I am NOT on drugs in fact!!! this is just my personality or neurodivergence. Probably both. Now I’m curious what I would be like high.

Any other neurodivergents who love yapping about their special interests but have issues with speech so they can’t actually communicate what they’re trying to say. I promise I do know of what I am speaking, my brain just cannot coordinate bodily functions. Tis so frustrating because I am so exited to talk about these things but for whatever reason I cannot!!!

To disabled people, you have a right to support, you have a right to exist.

We must end this idea of “disabled enough” so many of us deny ourselves or have been denied accomodations and support due to this idea. If you benefit from a cane then you have a right to use a cane. You are not taking away resources from others who “actually need it” if it helps you go about your life with greater ease then you are who it was made for. You have a right to use facilities such as priority seats. You have the right to rest. I promise you my dear that does not make you lazy in the slightest. You have a right to ask when you need support you are not being needy or demanding. If you struggle with urgency issues, you have a right to use the disabled bathroom, if you benefit from it then you have a right to use it. If digit toys help you, then you should be able to carry a fidget toy. If you need more time for certain tasks, you have the right to be given such. I cannot stress this enough, this does not make you lazy. Asking for support does not make you selfish.

You have a right to call others out on their ableism. You are not “too sensitive”, having a disability does not mean you always have to be in good humour about your condition, it does not mean you have to take whatever comes your way. If you are being treated cruelly, if you are being dismissed, demeaned, insulted and talked down upon you have a right to address this.

If you benefit from pre-prepared meals, use them!! It does not make you lazy. All I want you to focus on is that you are keeping yourself as well fed as you can. Reduce your struggle wherever possible! What abled people often consider laziness often is in fact rather how a person with a disability is able to assist themself in their daily life. You are allowed to make things easier for you, in fact I ask that you do.

You are allowed to use mobility aids in public, glucose monitors, nasal cannulas or any other devices that keep you safe and healthy. It does not make you look worse, it is not an eyesore or something that must be hidden. Your disability does not make you unpresentable, you have a right to be in public if your disability affects the way you look, if you make noise or you drool. Your disability does not make you unworthy of being seen.

Your disability doesn’t make you “stupid”. Not scoring well in school does not make you stupid, difficulty with reading or speaking does not make you stupid. Inability to work does not make you a burden. Not contributing to capitalism does not mean your life has no value.

Just because your disability is not as severe as that of others does not mean you shouldn’t be given support. The same goes for if you don’t “look” disabled. You do not owe explanations to others, you should not force yourself to do the same things in the same ways as those without your disability. You are going to do things differently and there are going to be things you can’t do. That does not make you lazy.

I tell you this with all the sincerity in my heart, the only person when it comes to your disability you owe anything to is yourself. You have a right to put yourself first. You have a right to rest. You have a right to exist as you are, a person with a disability.

Not only do I have to live with ocd but I also have to suffer through Sheldon cooper comparisons. If you have been compared to Sheldon Cooper at some point in your life you might eligible for financial compensation—

To people with disabilities, neurodivergences or mental illnesses, what is something/s that people who able bodied/non disabled/neurotypical people do that you wish they wouldn’t. I’ll go first:

• for ocd: guilting people into reblogging by saying stuff like “reblog or you’re a terrible person” “everyone needs to reblog” “reblog or you’ll have bad luck for three years” “like and subscribeif you care about your family” “don’t scroll this is a message from *insert deity*”

• misusing terminology such as intrusive thoughts and delusions.

• mimicking my tics

• teachers and parents describing adhd symptoms as just “laziness”