is being into coffee an older sibling thing bc everyone i know who loves coffee is the oldest child
like every oldest child ik loves coffee, the middle child hates it/prefers tea, and the youngest will drink it but only if its super sweet n has a ton of milk
rb w/ if ur oldest, middle, or youngest child and how u feel about coffee
me, acting suspiciously Functional™️: i can’t believe i’ve faked a mental illness for the last decade
!!!
I don’t trust Maroon 5
why
Well first of all there’s 7 band members, not 5. That’s not why I don’t trust them, I just think it’s weird.
Now getting to the point, do you know how many top 100 hits Maroon 5 has had? A lot. They’re even on billboards top 100 artists of all time (ALL TIME). And it’s understandable, because pretty much every song they put out is fucking awesome. Sugar, Don’t Wanna Know, Moves Like Jagger, Payphone, This Love, She Will Be Loved, Cold, Animals, Maps, Misery, Harder to Breathe, Never Gonna Leave This Bed… to name a FEW.
These shitheads have been popping out jams since I was a little kid. Well over a decade worth of killer music. Every other song I hear on the radio is Maroon 5. It’s always Maroon 5. And I fucking love it. I love all their songs. Everyone does, they’re awesome.
But here’s the thing. They’re never the top selling artists. On the top 100 list, they’re only in the 40s. They very rarely have a number 1 hit. They’re considered good, I suppose….. but not great. Not the best.
How many people have you heard say Maroon 5 is their favorite band? For me it’s zero. For many of you, it’s zero. If you’re thinking to yourself “what? No I love them, they’re my fave!” Are you sure? Are you really sure? They’re your absolute complete FAVORITE band ever??? I doubt it. You’re just saying that because the band is on your mind now. If I asked you your fave band any other time you’d come up with another answer. Everyone always does.
But they SHOULD be everyone favorites. Look at all of those songs. They’ve got so many top hits. Everyone loves their music. Everyone sings along and knows the songs. They should be my favorite band, I think I like more of their songs than of my actual favorite artist. But they are not my favorite. They are no ones favorite.
I think they made a deal with someone. Satan? God? A dude down an alleyway? Who knows. But I believe they made a deal to ensure everyone would love their music. And we do. It’s great music.
But the twist is that they’ll never truly be recognized as one of the best. Sure, their songs will play on the radio and everyone will sing along. They’ll have sold out concerts. Plenty of fans. But not enough. They’ll be just good. Never great. Never the best. Even if they should be our favorite, they never will be. They’ll never sell enough albums or have their songs reach as high on the billboards as they should. Everyone loves their music, per the agreement. But no one loves them.
I hope Adam Levine knows I’m on to him. I know what he did.
IT IS BACK
Thor ‘i don’t know what to do’ Odinson
i hate him so much
*googles number i dont recognize calling me instead of answering*
Auntie Hella checking on the Papillon puppies… she never had a litter of her own so she always cared for all the pups born here at #tantezampekennel
imagine having such a beautiful fairy godmother
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you… Lord of Thunder. Watch out for his fingers. They make sparks.
over the course of their life time, an average melbournian will spend twenty five years sleeping, forty thousand dollars on coffee, and at least eight hundred years sitting on an unmoving train between fucking flinders street and the previous fucking station
nobody likes the “bad boys” who insult and degrade their partners while wearing pastel polos with popped collars, people like REAL bad boys who wear leather jackets and take a lot of care in how they shape their pompadour and carry around stiletto switchblades and care about their communities and ride a motorcycle and rebel against the government and says stuff like “NOBODY insults my gal” and gets in fistfights with dudes who catcall their girlfriends. THOSE bad boys are the guys everyone wants.
Jolene by Dolly Parton except it’s playing downstairs while you’re laying up in the loft of a cabin listening to the thunder and rain hitting the roof tiles above you
My boyfriend just woke up, mostly still asleep and told me “don’t worry, it’s getting better” in a heavy, American accent, which is unusual for an Australian man.
“Why are you American?” I asked, to which I got:
“Sorry, it’s getting better” in a stereotypical posh English accent.
“Why are you English?” I asked, amused.
“What is he normally?” He managed to ask.
“He? You’re not anyone else, you’re you.”
“Ugh, me” was the last thing he said, in a right proper Aussie accent before he fell back into proper sleep.
Bitch just thwarted a ghost possession by judging his accents
My boyfriend would be gettin’ hit with the baseball bat beside our bed if he ever woke up and said, “What is he normally?” about himself.
Then you would NOT have liked the time he pointed to a corner of our room while he was sleeping and said “they share a dimension with Earth and they take cats to eat them”.
I absolutely do not like that.
when the months keep passing by even though you’re not in the head space to emotionally process them and you realize it is impossible to escape the passage of time
I literally can’t get myself to sit through movies that don’t have women. I’m like where the fuck are the women? Why are there so many men? This is boring as fuck goodbye
Even if it’s historically accurate?
as everyone knows, women were invented in 1990
All the notes of “women weren’t on old time battlefields” are wrong. There were more prostitutes and merchant women than there were soldiers in most every encampment. They followed the armies, marching alongside them, and notably ran the camps.
Many more women dressed as men to fight.
Long before female nurses were officially considered to be a part of the military, they were already on the battlefield. They merely didn’t get written into official reports because they were “invisible women”, “not supposed to be there”. Usually they would be local women running a makeshift care center out of their homes.
Movies involving ancient societies? Guess how many had female fighters?
Spies? Mostly female. Yeah, only the men were caught, usually (because nobody suspected the servant woman), but historians believe most cases had more women spies than men. Most cases meaning across time and continents.
Giving me a movie on samurai? Women were trained as well to avoid being captured and raped, and often fought just as hard as men. One woman notably survived multiple battles, and became a hero alongside her sisters after taking out 7 men before dying in her last fight (usually in sword fighting you’d be lucky to take out 2 enemy soldiers. 7 is fucking insane, but because she was a woman it was shoved under the records how the lord managed to survive).
Women have ALWAYS been on battlefields. Women have an intense history in driving victories and losses alike. They were supply runners, fighters, spies, assassins, prostitutes (look up how prostitutes essentially ran the western world, or even the social status of harem members. They literally fucking ruled), even underground activists.
The only time there weren’t many women were with cowboys. Actual western cowboys tended to be both POC and gay. In fact, any time women didn’t have a near equal or greater presence, there was a LOT of gay men.
History: either 80% female or 100% gay. And it’s 95% POC.
“Capitalism made your-”
No. LABOUR made it. LABOUR made my phone, my laptop, the internet, this website, my clothing, my house, all social media, and everything else. LABOUR makes things, Capitalism doesn’t because economic systems don’t ‘make’ anything, they just determine who gets paid for making things.
