i love you 3000

despite everything....

Here's how the Dark Urge currently looks like in my newest run, rocking that headwear ✨

Pop that hip and slay (slays in two ways)

They are his CROCS, Tav

do you guys ever think about how Wyll is introduced as an archetypal fantasy hero, but then it turns out he’s a warlock, who made a pact with a devil. Do you ever think about how Ansur is described as this fantastical dragon of myth, but then when you find him, he’s turned into an undead monstrosity. Do you think about how when Wyll does the right thing, he is punished to become more monstrous. Do you think about how as Wyll’s warlock powers grow, his spells get more horrific. Do you think about how Ansur was killed by his closest friend. Do think about how Wyll was cast out by the most important person in his life. do you guys ever think about Ansur and Wyll.

Shut up

gen z has to reckon with its radicalization problem. you are not a morally pure and superior generation of youth come to save the world, your men and boys are radicalized at an unprecedented level and you ignore it because it’s too hard to address but you have to. these boys are in your classes, they date your friends, you know them and you cannot continue to pretend this is an “old white guy” problem

girls are contributing, too. the coquette aesthetic, the “i don’t want to girlboss i want a man to pay my bills”, girlmath girljob girlmoney. it’s a joke, it’s clothes, it’s whatever, i get it but it is driving a mentality of traditional gender roles and you know you’re joking but your boyfriend doesn’t. your kid brother doesn’t. you have to stop this shit it is a contributing factor

Cats of Baldur's Gate III

“oh i like wyllstarion because they’re narrative foils” “oh i like wyllstarion because they have horrible crushes on each other and it’s so romantic and sweet” “oh i like wyllstarion when they’re divorced”. WRONG. I like wyllstarion because of how much it makes ulder ravengard’s life absolute hell. any iteration is funny but duke wyll trophy wife spawn astarion wyllstarion maybe the funniest. you abandon your son to the wild and the grips of a devil at age 17 and he comes back hero of baldur's gate and you already have to grapple with how the hell you apologize for something like that when the meanest most terrible invested in chaos and ruin VAMPIRE SPAWN in all of baldur's gate has made a home not just in your son's heart but also in YOUR home. AND THEY'RE GETTING MARRIED. AND HE HATES YOU. i'd kill myself

The dark urge and young lady Orin

THAT one's goin on the list too now!

I’m taking his boon every time

Gale: Tara NO Tara: Tara YES

Spawn Batstarion AU

I'm obsessed with how Astation regresses once you enter Baulders Gate.

Specifically, when Tav says "I just want you to be happy." And he basically says "Ah! and letting me trick and kill my fellow spawn would make me so, so happy. You said you wanted me to be happy right? You want this to happen too. This is really for us, you want what's best for us, surly." Its sooo good. I was honestly surprised and very disappointed in him in that scene, but it made so much sense and I love it.

Hes flailing, and terrified and that's when hes his worst self. When hes scared hes ruthless, selfish, mean and manipulative. "I'm not soft, cuddly Astarion! I'm scared! I do bad things! This is how I've made it so far!" Hes back to trying to play you like a fiddle, but Tav can see through it so easily and understand him much better.

Such smart storytelling.

I need someone to do a video essay-length deep dive into how 75% of the BG3 fandom fell so hard for Astarion's manipulative seductor act that they believe that's his actual personality. This man has to practice his lines and still fumbles them constantly. He flat-out says it's all a front because he believes his sex appeal is the only reason anyone would keep him around, which is tragic. When he drops the act, he becomes this kind of silly man rediscovering what it means to be himself, and what it means to both love and be loved. He says "I'm all pointy ears, love." while turning his head to show off those pointy ears. Let him be silly, let him be awkward! It's so much more authentic then him being a walking innuendo.

He has a mid charisma stat with a bonus for deception and rolled a nat 20 on all y'all.

our mildly inconvenienced king