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Let me carry your story in my heart

@misscrazyfangirl321

▪|Christian|▪|Fangirl|▪|Shorter than Olaf|▪ Nickname: Missy|▪︎|Profile pic by @songsintheattic|▪︎|Fandoms: Sanctuary, Grimm, Haven, Eureka, Timeless, Star Trek TOS, and many more.|▪|Multishipper deluxe.|
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I need to tell y'all about hot chocolate.

For most of my life, when I had hot chocolate, I had the Swiss Miss Dark Chocolate flavor. Well Swiss Miss has, for a few years now, been phasing out their dark chocolate flavor, and none of the local Walmarts carry it any longer. I was dependent on someone else buying it from Publix for me or taking me there, which was burdensome, since I also drink it year round.

And so hot chocolate became a sign between me and God. It's what I drank when times got hard and I needed to prove that I still trusted Him: He would provide replacement hot chocolate for me, since I wasn't in a position to do so. So I would drink a cup.

Things have been rough for my family lately. And tonight I got a nudge to go fix myself a cup of hot chocolate. And it got me thinking - about the time I had the very last packet of my Swiss Miss. Last packet, hard times, and I held it up and went "I trust You to provide me more of this."

He didn't. I don't have any way to acquire it. You know what He did? He led me to a recipe for homemade hot chocolate that I could make in giant batches that I actually prefer. I drink it almost every day, because I can, because it's cheap to make and abundant and I like it.

Hot chocolate is not really the promise that it once was - that I trusted Him to provide more - but it is now, instead, a reminder. That He provides abundantly.

<3

Would you be willing to share the recipe?

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whenever a kid is signing up for a library card and they and their parent have good silly vibes i like to treat it like a knighting ceremony. i'm like "jacob, child of hannah, i bestow unto you this card of great freedom and power. are you prepared to take on the literary responsibility of your very own library card? i believe you are." and it always makes them laugh and feel very important it's so much fun. like yeah we do a little improv at the library we do some bits

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Chuck and Tiffany, "Someone's protective of you."

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"Someone's protective of you."

Tiffany blinks and follows her father's gesture. She catches sight of Chuck watching them warily, arms crossed and scowling.

Something catches in her chest and stings in her eyes; the same way it always does when she is hit, once again, by the knowledge that he cares, that someone, somewhere, actually cares about her.

She swallows hard and clears her throat.

"Yeah, that's what drift partners are for."

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fransher - the king and his assassin, the assassin and her king

franco - halo 2022 // post by @inkstaindusk // madrigal written in winter - pablo neruda // chasing twisters - delta rae //teeth never sleep - angel garcía // descending figure - louise gluck // factories - autoheart // post by @senseofbelief // post by @creativepromptsforwriting // alpha rats nest - mountain goats // vinsher - halo 2022

bonus: too late by christian_latte (me)

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Herm and Newt, "You wrote me a letter?"

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Originally this was nightmares au, BUT I’m sliding it into ‘newt gets kidnapped by otachi and kept by the precursors for a while so they can figure out what the heck is up with him and then realize ‘whoops! humans are sentient! our bad!’ and eventually they get newt back’. au. which definitely is going to get a better name than that eventually. and kaiju bros, bc I haven’t written them NEARLY enough lately and I’ve been craving their dynamic

~~~

Newton is still in the hospital bed. If it were anyone else, Hermann would be glad of it. But Newton... doesn’t stay in hospital beds. He’s too fidgety. Too full of energy. Too manic. Once, he was found back in the lab, still hooked up to his IV bag, working and dancing around to his awful music. 

Someone’s given him a tablet, so that might be helping. He lazily flicks and pokes at it. 

Hermann watches for a moment, then clears his throat. Newton looks up.

“Oh, hey, man.”

“Good evening, Newton.”

“Is it evening?” Newton rubs his face and sighs softly. He looks exhausted. “Who needs a sense of time, right? Hey, uh-”

“Yes?”

“Did you...Write me a letter?”

The back of Hermann’s neck goes hot, and he straightens as best he can. 

“You checked your email?” Since when does Newton check his emails? Is this 2017? 

“Dude, I’ve been sitting here for weeks. I’ve literally got nothing better to do.”  There’s a spark of mockery in Newton’s face that makes Hermann long for the exhaustion to win out again. Hermann immediately braces himself for the worst, for the most vicious of Newton’s jokes. Surely he’s had time to store them up. 

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Sherry/Nick, "What did you bring me?"

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“What did you bring me?” 

“Lunch.”

“Duh.” 

Nick grabbed for the box, but Sherry quickly pulled it out of his reach. She was cute enough to get away with it, but he still made a noise of general displeasure. 

“No snatching.” She said. “We’re going to eat it together on your lunch break.”

“Just gimmie it. I’ll eat it while I work.”

“Then I won’t get to spend any time with you.” She said, sticking out her lower lip in a dramatic pout. Nick grinned, unable to help it. 

“Stay and talk. Keep me company while I work.” He said, pulling her into the garage. She glanced at the office.

"Fffffiiiiine. If I must.” 

Without any further ado, Nick grinned and leaned down to kiss her. They took a moment to give each other a proper hello, and then she let him snatch the box from her. 

“C’mon.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her over to the car he was working on. After setting his lunch on the nearby workbench, he easily hefted her up by the waist and set her on the hood of the car. Honestly, she should be the one eating the food. She weighed nothing. “Tell me whatcha been up to.”

She obliged, talking cheerfully as he slid back under the car and got to work. 

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Alejo and Isaac, "You should probably eat something."

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"You should probably eat something, Isaac."

"Yeah." Isaac runs a hand down his face and heaves a sigh. "Yeah, probably. I'm just not very hungry right now. Maybe later."

"You've been saying that for three days now."

"Really?" Isaac shoots Alejo a perturbed look. "I'm...Sorry. Sorry, cuz, it's just been a really weird few days."

I'll bet, Alejo thinks, but he just pats Isaac on the shoulder.

Hearing that Doc Newt's ill has taken it's toll on the Gottliebs. Nobody's even seen Dr. Gottlieb since Doc Newt...The details are fuzzy, and top secret, as in Alejo couldn't even find out when he accessed his dad's account, and his dad's been chief j-tech for like, thirty years.

But if there's one thing that Alejo knows, it's PPDC secrets.

He's old enough to remember when 'Doc Newt drifted with a kaiju' was novel knowledge, and concerning, and when he had to make monthly trips to Lightcap's lab for brain scans. Isaac, to an extent, and Fox, moreso, have never even existed in a world where Newt wasn't the guy who drifted with a kaiju.

Not that anyone's said Newt's sick because he drifted with a kaiju, and he never got better, he just didn't die right away, but Alejo can infer.

Instead of saying any of this, though, Alejo just gently loops a hand in the crook of Isaac's elbow and leads him to the mess hall. The least he can do for these poor kids is make sure they don't starve to death while they suffer through the knowledge of knowing that their family is sick and might never get better.

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i think an important distinction between Fox’s relationship with his mom vs his relationship with his dad is that he makes a lot of ‘haha my mom left to get milk and never came back’ jokes because he really doesn’t remember her or care at all that she left, but the moment his dad gets hurt the wound is so severe that he would probably try to punch someone if they made a crack about it.

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no but. srsly. the prg2 kids growing up thinking Newt is ‘the fun adult’ and friendly and fun and funny and he plays games w/ them and stuff. and then theyre adults and theyre like OHHH this man is SOOOO unwell.

prg2 kids, in the infirmary: oh sick an adult came to a board game with me to keep me company as I recover from a minor accident :) its really cool of him to come do this, he’s so nice!!

Newt, in the infirmary: oh sick a lil buddy to play board games with as I wait for the results of my umpteenth brain scan of the year because i’m constantly on the verge of death thanks to drifing with a kaiju!!

dude oh my gosh absolutely. alejo does that a lot, realizing ‘ohhhh these kids. do not understand about this Thing’, that’s such a good observation

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Platonic Newt and Herm, 20 or 21

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20 - Android

LISTEN I LEGIT HAVE AN ANDRIOD NEWT AU FLOATING AROUND SO AHHHH

~~~

"Can you feel that?"

"Nope."

"Fascinating." Hermann murmurs, holding the tiny test prod against the positronic brain. It's humming in response to him, but apparently absolutely painless to the Android.

Who in their right mind would build a robot without pain receptors? Not that it's exactly the same as when a human feels pain, but there should definitely be some kind of automatic response system to allow the robot to understand it is being tampered with.

"Whatcha doing? Are you done yet?" N3WT asks.

Hermann grimaces and digs the prod in deeper, trying to get some sort of reaction.

"Hermann, buddy?"

"It's Dr. Gottlieb!" Hermann snaps, yanking the prod away. He scowls at the panel, and then snaps it closed, sealing N3WT's head closed once more. "We need to fix that, first of all. I assume that your pain receptors have merely lapsed, or that they put in some other notification system to alert you to..."

"Nope, nothing. Check this out." N3WT spins the chair around to face Hermann, holds up both hands, and then uses one to unclick the other.

"Don't-!" Hermann tries, but it's too late.

"Cool, huh?"

"Of all the unethical, ridiculous-"

"No, man, it's awesome. I can do it with both hands, but, uh, obviously not at the same time, because I need a hand to do it, and-" There's a fizzing sound from his dethatched hand.

"Put it back on before you break something."

Obediently, the android puts his hand back on.

Hermann drags a face over his hand and sighs. This thing is just one problem after another.

"I'll do my best to check your coding for any indication of malfunctioning code, Newt, but if I can't find anything, I'll need to contact the PPADC that-"

"What's that?"

"It's the Pan-Pacific Android Defense Corps, meant to keep things like you from existing." Hermann snaps, irritated at yet another interruption.

Only after several seconds of silence does Hermann realize what he's said. He winces, but before he can amend it, the android says, voice somehow both hesitant and blustering at the same time, "Yeah, well, I'd rather be a glitched, flawed, walking talking malfunction then a loser lame-o human like you."

"That's not what I meant, Newton!" Hermann snaps. "Someone made you so that you can't tell if you're being hurt! Do you have any idea what that means? Someone could be hurting you, damaging you, irreparably, and you might not even notice because you don't have anything to tell you! You wouldn't notice if you have water damage, if you have missing parts, if you're being changed- Someone made you explicitly so they could use you regardless of how it hurt, damaged, or endangered you!"

There's a click and a whir, N3WT's head buzzing away, and Hermann thinks he might finally have gotten the gravity of the situation into it's head.

"Newton, huh?"

"What?"

"You called me Newton. Cuz, like, Newt's the diminutive form of Newton, so of course the leap from Newt to Newton isn't far, and Isaac Newton was a genius, like me, so-"

"That's your take away?!"

"Well...I've dealt with not having pain receptors my entire life, but I've never had a real name before." The android spins his chair in a circle, then stops himself with his feet. "Anyways, who wants to feel pain? I've seen humans in pain before and it looks like it sucks, so you can count me out. Count Newton out."

Hermann manages a soft scoff before he turns away. But the gravity stays with him, at least, twisting and turning his gut as he begins to look into the copy-code he made.

He has a feeling he will, indeed, be going to Pentecost.

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How about... Newt & Hermann, 30?

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hhHHHHHH

30: evil

~~~

When Hermann stands up from the chair in front of Alice, Newton knows immediately that it's worked.

His brain is fizzling, crackling, popping, with their joy of victory, because-

Herrmann is infected.

As the apple the snake gave unto Eve is this drift system. It promised knowledge without sacrifice, but it's become torment, a hell of his own making, and there is no redemption.

Hermann moves slowly, jerkily, his face twisted in pain, and stares at Newt.

They have a stranglehold on him. There will be no slow, slippery descent. There will be no temptation, no giving in, no compromise, the way Newton went. For Hermann, there will only be the crushing knowledge that he is no longer his own.

And it's Newton's fault.

Both times, he was the one who played with fire, and this time, Hermann is burning.

"I'm sorry." Newton whispers. They allow it, because it makes no difference. Newton can say whatever he wants. His hands, his feet, his brain, they're not his own and he can't damage their plans by apologizing to a man they've already twisted twisted twisted and bent until the cracking of a sudden break can be heard in the near future.

"I'm so sorry."

"You will be." They say, with Hermann's mouth, and then Newt is jerked back from his own body and buried in regret.

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Newt and Herm friendship, Star Wars AU, "Exactly how is that going to help the Rebellion?"

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“Hey, Hermann! Nice to see you awake!” Newt calls through the open doorway, past something he’s got in his hands. 

“Hello, Newton. Aren’t you supposed to be doing something productive?”

“Yup. That’s what I’m doing.” He starts trying to cram the machine into the room, despite the fact that the doorway doesn’t seem to be wide enough. It would be an amusing sight if Hermann were in the mood for comedy - but given that he’s still recovering from what was apparently quite the complex surgery, he’s most definitely not in the mood for it. 

"And exactly how is that going to help the Rebellion?" He asks. 

Newt stops pushing the wonky looking machine machine through the room to catch his breath and shoots a glance at Hermann. He looks a mess, and Hermann grimaces. If he tracks mud in here again...

"Well, it's actually for you." Newt says, and then cringes. He slams his shoulder into it and manages to force it through. "I mean, it's so you can keep getting your work done. Because you gotta- You know. Keep...Doing your thing. While you're cooped up in here recovering."

He opens it out into a sort of stand with a floating desk computer attached to it. 

Hermann contemplates letting him fluster his way through another few sentences, but decides to take mercy on him. It was, after all, a very welcome gesture of goodwill.

"I suppose since I have nothing else to do, it'll keep me occupied." Hermann says, ironically. He tries to smile - to let Newton know its a joke.

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"Help's on the way. You just have to hold on a little longer." For the Twisted AU?

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“Help’s on the way. You just have to hold on a little longer.”

Newt knows he’s dreaming. Because the precursors would never let him be so still in real life, not with people around him. These days it’s all ‘blaaaahh we’re gonna rip out your throats if you come in arms’ reach!’ with those guys. So, this can’t be real. 

And it’s so quiet

Nobody else in his head. That’s another tip off that this isn’t real, because for years and years and years he’s had things crawling around his head. That’s real. Quiet isn’t real. 

“Newton, stay awake!” Clammy hands touch his cheek, but they don’t feel cold like they normally do.

“I know you’re setting me up.” Newt mumbles to the Precursors.

“What?” 

“You can’t trick me. It’s a dream.”

“This is not a dream.”

“Sounds like something nightmare Hermann would say.” Newt forces his eyes to open. “All that’s left is for your eyes to roll back in your head and-”

“He’s delirious.”  Hermann says, looking to the side. “I told you destroying the center hivemind would hurt him!”

“I’m not in pain.” Newt’s eyes close of their own accord, and his head lolls, threatening to fall off the nice soft thing it’s resting on. “You forgot that part.”

“...”

“The part where you hurt me?”

“I...”

“Come on, dudes, like, at least try to stay accurate in the sims! W-we’ve- Uh, you’ve...You gotta stay accurate if you wanna keep the suspension of disbelief...Suspended?” He’s so tired. Words aren’t working so well, so he gives ‘em up. They can dig around in his head if they want to figure out what he means. 

“No, no, Newton.” Fake-Hermann is shaking him, but it doesn’t stop him from slipping into blessed darkness. 

Weird. They haven’t let him fall unconscious before. 

They’ve gotta be getting more realistic with their simulations. 

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GIRL HELPI GOT LAST NAMES MIXED UP, I've been picturing Herm's family for the Geizlerfam. Sdjdjdjd ANYWAY RS, "I can't believe you'd do something like that! ... Without me."

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GFGBG its fine. it still works xD

~~~

"I can't believe you would do that. Without me." Newt's voice echoes from the kitchen to the dining room, where Herman sits, fiddling with his notebook. He's supposed to be working right now - Difficult, with Newt yelling at him. 

"It was hardly a pleasure trip." Herman grumbles. He slips his pen in the spiral and curls his fingers around his cane.

"Still, you go all the way to Germany, stay there for a week, and come back home, like it's nothing. You don't even tell me. I thought we were friends, bro."

"Fine, Newton. I am sorry that I didn't tell you, but I was busy. I hardly had time to think about you, let alone keep you updated on everything I was doing."

"Busy with with what?"

Hermann grimaces. He debates, briefly, not telling. But then Newt comes into the dinning room, slouches against the doorjam. He's eating ramen out of a baking bowl, wearing a three day old band shirt he got in collage, and still has some soap in his hair from washing his kids up.

He is so utterly alien to the Gottliebs's idea of dignity and propriety and judgement that it's almost comical. Hermann's shoulders relax.

"My father wants me to return to Germany." He admits.

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